Randy is starting to swell out like a woman… Dude, get to the gym…
“You feel tense, Randy! Let me show you some massage techniques I learned during a long, hot summer as John Travolta’s cabana boy.”
Remember the scene from Spaceballs when they accidentally beam President Scroob to the other room and his head is on backwards? “Why didn’t somebody tell me my ass was so big!”
Clearly, Kim Kardashian’s parts are interchangeable with Randy’s. They’re like Mr. and Mrs Potatohead.
“If your hands are there, whose hands are in my pockets?”
I think someone just made a huge Al Roker in his pants.
Poor Julianne Hough. Even Randy gets more action from Seacrest than she does.
Tired of being constantly molested by Seacrest, Jackson decided enough was enough and put on his spiky leather jacket to deter him. Unfortunately, it only turned on Seacrest to the max, afterall, he is a 50 Shades fan.
If Jonah Hill were black.
“You are going to feel a little prick…”
Wait, that doesn’t work if his ass is on backwards.
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Randy Jackson and Ryan Seacrest at the 39th Annual People's Choice Awards in Los Angeles. (January 9, 2013) -Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN