1. Man, the mall cop exam keeps getting less and less strict every year…

  2. The Pope

    *no caption needed*

  3. it had to be said

    You know how they say the Internet makes it hard to detect sarcasm? Let’s see: what a cool guy.

  4. Beefarino

    Hickory Dickory Dock. My Career Sucks Cock.

  5. Buddy the Elf

    Ya know what makes the outfit?
    The Nintendo Power Glove he’s rocking on the left arm.

    Pure Gold.

  6. The Dice man cometh…for your trash, it’s Monday afternoon. WHOA!!

  7. Perplexity

    T.J. Getmeahooker – ohhh!

  8. Perplexity

    The lost member of the Village People resurfaces for a tribute tour.

  9. Rough? Not for sale!

    Fox and Friends? So, he’s not on the set of Escape from NY, like it was understood?

  10. To say anything validates his presence.

  11. g-moonie

    I’m going to immediately start a vitamin regimen so I can live long enough to witness the Situation turn into this.

  12. Judge Dredd: The Later Years.

  13. Aud

    Bucket list: threesome with Andrew Dice Clay and Mickey Rourke. Enough man meat to last me 6 winters.

  14. cc

    He’s waiting for his twink, by the looks of it.

  15. Lolli-Pop

    Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, my head looks like an old guy’s dick! Oahhh!

  16. Matty

    “I am a douchebag sent back from the future to bone Sarah Connor”

  17. Hey diddle, diddle
    Hey, as long as she’s got a good fake ID!

  18. I did not think it was possible to look like a douchebag without wearing a wife beater..yet here we are.

  19. UncleDenial

    Steven Segal: Lawman Tanks vs Dogs

  20. You’re trying too hard, Larry King.

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