At a restaurant, you autograph the menu. At a bathhouse, the towel.
Indiana Jones,”Short Round where the fuck are you?”
“So basically, you take a white sheet like this and you cut a hole in it at crotch level. Then you just put it up in your entrance, leave the door unlocked, get down on your knees and wait for the magic to happen.”
I guess it could be called a “Glory Apron.”
“Uh, Mr. Cruise . . . What you’ve got there, it’s . . . uh, it’s not a dumpling.”
“I know, just enjoy it.”
He’s big in China
Tom Cruise is smiling because in Taipei they really know how to handle a man’s dumplings.
First, you pound it into submission with your hands, then you take out your long wood shaft and work it until it’s as flat as this table… What? Dumplings?! I thought you were talking about my ass.
Is that Vince Masuka on the right?
Din Tai Fung is one of my favorite restaurants, even though Tom Cruise is trying his very best to ruin it for me and everyone else now …
Quick question: Why does this Web site no longer function properly?
And a follow-up: Is anyone going to bother to fix it?
How many of those rice steamers is he standing on??
also, I think the website is broken…I keep clicking “view full size” and the picture stays the same
Isn’t this how the viral outbreak in Contagion began?
That stool gives you considerable height, Mr. Cruise.
I know, stop staring and drawing attention to it.
It’s cute how he puts a little heart above the “i”.
Tom Cruise is as happy as a pup with two tails because for once in his life he won the size comparison.
oh, and in case I wasn’t clear enough: penis. that’s what I’m talking about
How much is the food at that restaurant that this tightwad signs an apron to pay for his food instead of giving them money?
gotta keep an eye on his other hand…you never know where it might end up
AHAHA! For a second or two, I was honestly puzzled over what appeared to be ‘Homo Cruise’ scrawled on his apron, figured it must be a joke, and laughed pretty hard! Then I realized it was his signature, and laughed harder.
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