This guy has got to stop hanging out with David Beckham

Did we finally ship him to Australia like they used to do with criminals?

I bet his cock speaks with a lisp.

He should have gotten that Jesus tat on his fist so he could say, “Don’t blame me bitch, JESUS is the one hitting you.”

“You do feel a bit of a pinch when a seagull tries to blow you.”

See, these are my balls. They’re what I have when my bodyguards are nearby or I’m fighting a tiny woman.

I thought this was Justin Bieber from the thumbnail. Dumb hats + skinny jeans = contagion.

“Help! He beats me!”

Not pictured: The black microphone.

Tattooed up like the piece of shit criminal that he is.

So now that he’s shown the world what an awesome human being he is, he’s about to tackle penis ventriloquism.

Stay classy…douche.

He looks like the textbook definition of someone who takes it up the ass.

WTF happened to Popeye’s dad? Did Bluto do that to him?

He might be the biggest badass West Hollywood has ever seen

If you zoom in on his shoulder tat, instead of “What would Jesus do?”, you’ll read “Who would Jesus punch?”.

Chris Brown’s concerts don’t seem to be doing as well since he went to a 2 hour cover of “Smack my bitch up.”

T-W-I-T-!-!-!

He has nice teef. Too bad about the rest of him.

Sounds of pissing are easier on the ears.

Yeah, lemme know when you actually find a pair, you fucking coward.

Pulling a Kardashian? You’re doing it wrong, dickface.

And by “Chris Brown performs” I’m assuming you mean Chris Brown holds his dick again.

Do you think he could get arrested for beating himself?