1. “Listen bitch. When Mama Kris says you marry another basketball player by 2014, she means it.”

  2. Somewhere right now Rihanna’s panties grow inexplicably damp…

  3. I see someone’s been reading Melissa Gorga’s book.

  4. Dox

    Nothing says I love and respect my spouse as much as grabbing them like a naughty dog in front of the entire world, and having it immortalized in the national media.

    Coming up next… Chris Brown’s Marriage Counseling Hour….

  5. JimBB

    Russians make such respectful and sensitive boyfriends.

  6. “C’mon, one last time….AHHHHHHH…fuck, paps”

  7. Keeping squeezing… a litte harder.

  8. Odbarc

    I find your lack of faith disturbing…

  9. cc

    You ate the last piece of Hubba Bubba?! Give it to me! GIVE IT TO ME!

  10. “Come here! I’m gonna feed you like a baby bird!”

  11. BlackManUSAonTwitter

    “Sure…when you read it in that Grey book, it gets you wet. When I do it in real life, you call it ‘creepy’. “

  12. “SShhh… sshhhhh… it’s almost over.”

  13. Paully Boston Baby!

    You know, you can really tell when it’s like a playful thing or not. And I’m telling you this chic is getting her azz whooped tonight. Pretty sad, but obvi she’s with some rich middle eastern fuck of a man who beats women to control them and shit. Nice going Kyle! I’m sure we’ll see a domestic abuse story on TMZ in the next few days.

  14. donkeylicks

    Quick I need a “silverstone” !

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