1. Govt. Cheese

    Kelly Clarkson = The definition of Lower Body Obesity!

    • Lower body? I think she is the poster child for just plain ole’ obesity.

      • Gil

        When Kelly won American Idol, and was featured in People Magazine, she was quoted as saying “I won’t starve to be a star.” Someone needs to tell her that not only is she absolutely in no danger of starving, but there is a significant difference between not starving, and being obese

  2. Frank Burns

    The music video must be a remake of her prior song, now titled “Miss Independent of Dietary Restrictions”.

  3. I never thought I’d have to visualize what it would look like if someone inflated Hillary Duff…

  4. kec232

    Wow Kelly Clarkson’s midget impersonator is spot on.

  5. Bonky

    Cut, cut. I can’t go on. Where the hell is the fucking food truck already ?

  6. Deacon Jones

    Alright God. Enough with turning up the gravity dial!

  7. Why do I get the feeling her new “music video” is going to be very abstract, and not a lot of dance moves.

  8. dotmatrix

    Get the plunger ready!

  9. BlackAndWhiteMinstrel

    Oesophagus Now!

  10. slippinx12

    She did a cover of Baby Got Snacks?

  11. Who knew “Since You’ve Been Gone” was about cupcakes?

  12. Venom

    Kelly, call Weight Watchers ASAP.

  13. Depeche Mode’s “I JUST CAN’T GET ENOUGH.”
    When I’m hungry, I go out of my head
    I just can’t eat enough, I just can’t eat enough
    In the morning, she comes in a puffin
    she wants that egg mcmuffin, she wants that egg mcmuffin’
    she reaches in for the superfries
    and she pulls herself out two blueberry pies……

  14. I think she is so pretty, but she dresses so badly for her body. I saw her in concert and her wardrobe was upsetting. Skinny jeans do her no favors!!!!!

  15. Perplexity

    Kelly, fleeing the scene after committing several crimes, including destruction of public property, causing public panic, and illegally dumping of toxic waste – when she dropped a mega-duece at the restroom at the Baldwin Park In & Out Burger.

  16. kimmykimkim

    Oh, Kelly. For the love of all things decent in this world, get a personal trainer. You’d have the money for one if you’d just cut your fried chicken budget. Completely.

  17. Ma! The meatloaf! Fuck!

  18. gigi - perplexed

    still don’t know why black guys like this sort of thing…

  19. cp3

    Black is slimming but it’s not a fuckin miracle worker.

  20. rando-calrissian

    I guess eating everything in sight can help your music career *Ahem* #JessicaSimpson.

  21. Evil Dick Tater

    I’m certain that video will be an ass-ault on the senses.

  22. Fester

    I read somewhere that when she got her labia pierced gravy came out.

  23. All hands on deck – the gravy boat captain is finally here!

  24. juaqin ingles

    What? Hahaha wow she put that on fast.

  25. cc

    The song presumably is ‘Hot Crisco’.

  26. kankles

    Not pictured-her black boyfriend waiting in the car so they can go get some fried chicken.

  27. Straight Guy

    I still would ;-)…

  28. Misana

    Black makes you look slimmer.

  29. mike

    she’s on her way to meet molly ringwald for breakfast

  30. TetterkeT

    Is her new single called “From The Waist Up?”

  31. Racer X

    I’d hit it.

  32. Mr. Creosote

    id hit it.

  33. Weebles wobble, but they don’t fall down.

  34. duddlyDOwrong


  35. riptide

    Crap! I thought that was a very pregnant Hilary Duff.

  36. This is what happens when attractive women are single too long.
    Jennifer Love Hewitt proves this daily.

  37. Every time I see that car ad with her and Boomer I think ‘wow he lost 40 pounds and Kelly Clarkson found them’

    Oh and “My Life Would Suck Without Food’

  38. licialicia

    For some reason I think Kelly knows exactly how big she is and doesn’t give a fuck what you people say.

  39. She is indeed a “large” girl, but she’s a very sexy “large” girl.

  40. SIN

    Don’t care, don’t care, don’t care. I would really love to be with her.

  41. fattymcgee

    I’m starting to think that some of her publicity photos have been photo shopped.

  42. Violet

    I foresee a cover of ‘Baby Got Back’.

  43. Hugh Johnson

    Gimme some of that.

  44. That humongous ass looks like it’s about to break-away.

  45. Steelerchick

    She’s either getting shorter or fatter. Either way I think it’s some kind of an optical illusion.

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