Up…you know, like the direction my nipples are pointing.
Why are completely unknown people writing books and who in God’s name is actually buying them?
She starred in a show called “The Only Way is Essex” for sixty-five episodes, she has the Katie Price-esque glamour model look down pat, and she went through personal struggles.
Roll all of that together and you’ve got yourself a book deal.
Why is there an attractive women pictured on the cover of her autobiography?
I think photoshoppers call it artistic license.
Why don’t I have a book?
_FUCKING_ YES! You and me both, McBeef. You and me both :/
Also, said it before but, NO ONE does skanky as well as the Brits do.
[cough] Courtney Stodden [cough]
You know you’ve gone overboard with the photoshop when the coverphoto looks nothing like you.
It might be time to turn the heat up at that bookstore. Or not.
“The only way is up”? That’s a funny title for a book written by someone who got to where she is on her back.
To be fair to her, when she’s on her back she is looking up.
Her book!!!! WTF
Original title: ‘The Only Way To Look Like Me Is An Uppercut’
She’s holding the wrong book…her book is actually ‘A Night at the Wax Museum’
That’s one busted up face.
Heinous jewelry; busted face.
Is the top rubber?
She doesn’t look like she has ever read a book much less wrote one.
*written but yeah.
Who goes to a plastic surgeon and says “Make me look like a Bratz Doll”?
If you think those are two different people up there—and for the life of me, one of them looks black—let me show you a third version of this example of Whorus britannicus, this one in a more natural state:
HOLY SHIT! What’s going on here?
A bad case of Frankenface!
Easily confused with Bethany Frankelface.
This is what I picture the result of being hit in the face with a frying pan would look like.
Her chin is the opposite of Rumors chin.
“Oh, hello, Chloe. I’m busy now. Just leave your nipples on the table and run along like a good lass…there ya go!”
Is it ever a good idea to pose next to a Photoshopped photo of yourself? Particularly when you are this broad?
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Chloe Simms signing copies of her book in Liverpool, UK. (November 10, 2012) -Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN