“I have given a name to my pain, and it is Batman.”

I know I left my career around here somewhere.

Looks legit.

“Gee your plastic surgery looks terrific.”

Goot efening.

It’s only a matter of time before Melanie Griffith’s plastic surgeon eventually kills someone.

Her plastic surgery has no made it so that she can only eat if people throw pieces of day-old bread at her duck face.

Looking good! Only two more surgeries and she’ll look just like Susan Boyle.

Holy shit, I’m gonna have to beat off to Baby’s Day Out again to unsee this! -did I say that out loud

Poster girl for plastic surgery fail.

“Fuck. Got rained on again.”

Janice Dickenson isn’t looking so bad now that I see what this chick has done to herself. DAMN.

Geriatric bloat?

Lara Flynn Boyled Meat.

Mickey Rourke is looking good… Wait a minute…

Isn’t this the one who said she would rather drink bleach than be a commoner? This woman makes me so grateful for my commoner face and commoner body.

AFLAC!!!

She was once the sexiest hollywood woman! It’s so hard to imagine now. She is like the female version of a once handsome Mickey Rourke.

I have always wondered what Lando Calrissian’s co-pilot has been up to since The Empire Strikes Back.

Did this happen just from rubbing up against Jack Nicholson?

No! Why is Liv Tyler melting?! Oh…oh good, it’s just Lara. Whew.

I want to tear a duck crossing sign out of the ground and follow her around it. 50 pounds of concrete and all.

Now here’s a woman who hasn’t survived the Hollyweird machine intact.

There was a time when I would have loved for Lara to Boyle my prick, but now I wouldn’t touch her with a fork!

That’s just fucking sad.

Why the long face?

Damn, Lindsay stole her colagen again!

Jesus Christ.. She used to be so freaking hot.. WTF