Collective blood alcohol concentration > collective IQ.

“I tell ya Gerri, you can’t throw a stone around here without hitting a jew, queer or nig***…”

Well I didn’t hear about any big fires down in Miami so I guess Mel found some female companionship.

“So three Jews walk into an oven…..”

“…sure are a lot of jews around here”

Didn’t know they opened up a Scotchbucks in Miami.

The jovial discussion of which accessories suit a man better, necklaces or bracelets, later escalated into a whiskey-fueled brawl, and then passionate albeit clumsy lovemaking by the two chums, with matching pear necklaces ultimately resolving the question.

“….so I blacked out and never remembered fucking her….she told the tabloids and everything…it was crazy. What about yours?”

“That’s bush league shit, bro. I straight up kill women.”

“I always use a coffee cup and that way, people think I’m on the wagon.”

“…So if I kill you, eat your heart and put you in the ground, legend has it that I will become you.”

“It’s like that chick says in Goodfellas—Miami’s nice, but it’s like you died and woke up in Jew heaven.”

“No, no, you gotta go to Thailand for that. The Brazilian ones look okay in, like, when you see them on the internet or whatever, but in person they’re like six feet tall and have these weird voices.”

“Is it ‘two in the pink’ or ‘two in the stink?’”

what the fuck are they doing together?

“What do you mean: I’m three years and a couple of racist comments away from being you?”