1. “No, my wife ordered a BLACK guy!”

  2. cc

    ‘I’m telling you, this fuckin’ latino looking guy is telling me I’m his long lost son.’

  3. Where's Dildo

    “Listen, Damn it! I’m Larry King! I’ve got a wax wife standing next to me and a brown kid from one of those sand countries to shake my penis. You’ll do what I say!”

    “Mr. King, you’re speaking into your collar.”

    “We’ll be right back after this diaper change…”

  4. Senor Trout

    “DEPENDS! Can’t you fucking hear? I’m asking if you carry DEPENDS!?’

  5. “Mr. King! My great great great great grandfather is on the phone and he says he went to school with you. Say hi to him!”

  6. dontkillthemessenger

    She doesn’t have the heart to tell Larry he’s talking into a garage door opener.

  7. She’s 54 and yum. That is all.

  8. I ain’t saying she a golddigger…
    wait, yes I am. She is a gold digging whore.

  9. Vlad

    How YOU doin’?

  10. Schadenfreude

    Bravo’s newest TV series : Real Housewives of the Walking Dead.

  11. Son of Flubber

    “Hello? CNN? I’m I on the air? BABA BOOEY BABA BOOEY BABA BOOEY!!”

  12. “Hey, Seymour, there’s a tall, beautiful blonde standing here next to me saying she’s my wife. Can I fuck her?”

  13. I Love It

    I’ll bet she only lets him climb on once a year.

  14. “Siri! How do I keep all these guys from hitting on my wife?”
    *beep beep* “Divorce her.”

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