superficial

  1. Yeah, this is her father.
    No, I can’t get you a date with her…
    I barely speak to her myself…

  2. Contusion

    Even Mitt’s phone banks look like it’s 1963.

  3. USDA Prime McBeef

    “Is this really Jon Voight?!? The famous actor? Wow!!”

    “Yes, I’m really Jon Voight”

    “Holy shit! Well this is my goddamn cell phone asshole, take me off your goddamn list and quit fucking calling”

  4. Happy_Evil_Dude

    Yes I will give you Angie’s phone number if you vote Romney

  5. “This is serious shit. If you don’t vote for Romney, you could end up with ethnic grand children too!”

  6. 1NDUN

    “It’s not legitimate unless they squeal like a pig.”

  7. bigalkie

    This pic just garnered Obama another hundred thousand undecideds

  8. C’mon Angelyne, if you can just get half of your kids to vote for him, we can turn this country around!

  9. Contusion

    Hi, I’m calling voters in the New York area letting you know not to worry…as long as the hurricane hits prior to the election you’ll still be able to collect aid from FEMA. Now…if Romney wins, that shit’s off the table you moocher!

  10. Bionic_Crouton

    “What am I wearing?…. Depends.”

  11. Photo Boy, you misspelled “Romney”! Why do you hate Amercia?

  12. EricLR

    Finally putting his right purty mouth to some use.

  13. Why am I not surprised that this old asshole would be supporting Romney? Because old assholes are Romney’s base.

  14. Porkpie

    “Please, Angie, let me molest you one more time for old-time’s sake!”

  15. Vlad

    Now why is it the only time you call me is for another damn treasure hunt?

    No, I’m not doing it Nick, not this time…you and your bad hair piece are on your own.

    Oh, and can I interest you in voting for Mitt?

    Son of a bitch hung up on me!

  16. cc

    At least someone is getting good use out of the desk I tossed out when I graduated college.

  17. “Yeah, Quizno’s? We’d like to order your sub platter. White bread only.”

  18. It’s time to throw in the towel when the world’s foremost deadbeat dad becomes a selling point to your campaign.

  19. Brit

    Yessir, I sincerely believe that Russia is our number one enemy, Obama is a Kenyan muslim socialist and that liberals hate America. Thank you for helping us keep government hands off our Medicare.

  20. “If you vote for Obama, I swear I will come to your house, snap your neck, smother your children and piss on your corpse! Now it’s been nice talking to you Angie, but put Brad on the phone…I wanna talk to him about that Chanel #5 ad”

  21. “dee-de-dit-dit-dee-dit-de-dit-dit…Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. America and all the ships at sea. This Just In…!!!
    Separated at birth: Jon Voight and Donald Trump. Film at eleven!

  22. Martina

    “This is John Voight and we’re raising bail money for Mel Gibson, and … ” {{{click}}}

  23. Ripley's Believe It Or Not

    “Hello? Hello. What? You have proof Obama wasn’t born in America?” *points to phone as face turns an urgent red* SOMEONE TRACE THIS CALL. TRACE. THIS . CALL!

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