Not pictured: 100 black horses pulling on the strings to tighten that dress….

She’s been pilfering her wardrobe from Gina Lee

Now if they just made Transitions lenses that covered the whole face!

Congratulations Mary Carey…you finally won!

wow, mariah got so hungry she ate the bottom half of her sunglasses. a girl’s gotta eat

Why is she wearing Nick Cannon’s pubes around her neck?

With those frickin glasses, she looks like Lew Wasserman.

Oink Oink

And Jessica Simpson says: “damned skinny bitch!”.

This is the look of a woman holding in a fart.

I prefer Mary Carey. Not only is Mary more intelligent but she’s more interesting.

I don’t know why, but I’ve always been obsessed with her breasts. Don’t really give two shits about the rest of her, but those tits have me hooked.

Yeah, sure black is slimming.

I’d motorboat those tits and spray her face.

Introducing Goodyear’s new steel-belted radial dress. Rated to 60 psi.

When did eyebrows and foreheads start needing sunglasses?