William Shatner in Los Angeles. (September 26, 2013) -Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Denny Crane, motherfuckers. Denny Crane.
No, I am not Kaley’s real father and no, I will not give you her phone number.
“I’m telling you, pure raccoon fur. Even got it myself. Ask me how much I saved!”
First a girdle and now a murse? Shatner? More like Shatthebed.
Where the hell did Shatner get real hair? I thought he was a wigger.
Well, my father told me that William Shatner was never going to die, and now I know it’s true: he’s aging in reverse.
“It’s not a PURSE! I call it a ShatBag. On second thought after hearing that out loud, I’m cool with purse”
I said WARP SPEED! Or I’ll fucking bash you with my purse!
“It’s not a purse, it’s a SATCHEL!”
“Shatner will not be trifled with. Stop wasting Shatner’s time and retrieve the car. And make sure it is stalked with a 32 ounce big gulp, a 4×4 from In-N-Out, a fifth of Jack, two (I SAID TWO DAMN IT) copies of the Wall Street Journal, a mixed tape of N-Sync, a 24 inch flat screen (I know it’s an odd size-special order it), and a bottle of Axe body spray.
Shatner gets what Shatner wants. Leave me.”
Jer-RY! Jer-RY! Jer…oh, sorry Mister Shatner…
it’s not a purse!! it’s EUROPEAN!
“One lesbian to beam up.”
“90% of communication is body language and I speaking the language of oral love.”
“Warp speed, Mr….heyyyy, you’re not Mr. Sulu.”
“I’m a Rock-It Man”
“CHURROS! That is all you will find in my bag my good man!…CHURROS!”
“That TSA agent just went where no man has gone before !”
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