{{{Face melts off… a la Raiders of the Lost Arc}}}

Somebody please explain to me what the fuck I am looking at

ahhh fuck no, dude. fuck no.

“I saw her bend over to start taking of her clothes, and I instantly knew this was going to be the worst life drawing class I had ever attended.”

At first I was all, “WTF is that?!?!”

Then I saw the title and I was all, “Oh, that makes sense.”

Look, I get it.. Canada sent us Bieber but let’s put some proportionality back into our response…

Still, you can’t help thinking how much better she’d be without oxygen

It’s nice when she shows the audience her ‘good side’.

Old woman, get off the stage!

I just hope she’ll know when to “retire gracefully.”

Oh geez, you can see all the way up to where her ovaries used to be.

That’s what they say–”When you get old, the right buttock is always the first to go….”

Harryhausen’s Cyclops was WAY more realistic.

Well, that’s fucking distressing.

She needs to stop. She is not sexy anymore. She is not young anymore. She needs to accept the hard facts. She got old and this makes her look like an idiot. Nothing nice about it.

Great! Now I’m a pillar of salt!

Beauty’s where you find it–not, evidently, where she bumps and grinds it.

Ooof!

Madame Tussauds wax figure of Madonna melted again.

Nice perfume. What’s it called, Eau de Mothballs?

She’s getting a job at the new Hooters for old men. It’s caled Cooters.

That just looks bizarre. Is that a butt prosthetic or something? Weird.

It’s like watching people put away a hot air balloon.

Why is it lopsided? Why is it lumpy? WHY AM I LOOKING AT IT???

Cannot be unseen. :-(

Gaze into the face of God and despair!

If I can’t see the arms I’m happy.

So that’s why the city stank so badly that day.

“Beauty lies in the eye of th-GAHD WHAT THE NOOO, MAKE IT GO AWAY, FIRE, FIRE, KILL IT NOW!!!!”

Blame it on global warming

it’s all bad fishnets and weird camera angles…..

Well, that’s ruined cheerleader outfits for me.

Get the wench some pantaloons.

And then Gallagher hit it with a sledgehammer, much to the distress of the first three rows.

ay yi yi. Stephen King wrote this storyline.

Looks like the puppet from Saw found a mate.

I understand she lip-synced the entire show In this position.

She’s just doing a tribute to Señor Wences.

Candice Swanepoel would look good in that pose.

I guess I just don’t understand showbiz. how is this considered “performing?”

GOBBLE, GOBBLE!

[img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/14/letogobble-340_453.jpg[/img]

Completely uncalled for.

Christ, the back of her knees somehow look like the front of her knees.
I can’t actually bring myself to look any higher than that :(

“That’s no moon, it’s a space station”
“It’s too big to be a space station”

…when she turned back around, the audience was gone and all the straight men turned gay.

Doesn’t Cher have to approve all photos of Madonna before they’re posted here?

This is how NOT to age gracefully.

Wait. When she stands up, how far down will the end of her ass go?

Bend at the knees, grandma. Bend at the knees.

OHHH FUCK MEEEE… I fucking looked. Someone call 9-1-1. Medic! I need a Medic!