superficial

  1. Andy

    “Don’t lie to me. You were the one who whispered “saggy boobs.” Now tell us all what you meant.”

  2. Mission Impossible 5: Try Not to Be Gay

  3. Say what you want, the dude makes good movies. All the MI movies apart from 2 have been very good. “Edge of Tomorrow” was excellent.

    • Yeah I think Tom gets a bad rap. He’s awesome and has been entertaining us for decades.

    • itz

      I think most of his movies suck balls – but EoT redeems them all. It was a freakin’ awesome movie, one of the best, most intelligent actioners of the last 25 years. The fact that it made about 10% of what Transformers 4 did is another testament to our stupidity as a species.

      • Short Round

        Loved EoT. First film since Collateral I truly enjoyed. But I always wondered about the generic title. From the start I thought ‘Live Die Repeat’ would have been much better. Glad to hear the DVD release wil basically rename the film as such.

  4. Marketing Mike

    I love Tom Cruise (of course not in “his” way)
    But dude really needs a bra for those man-boobs.

  5. Short Round

    Let me guess, he’ll be hanging from somewhere, run like a stabbed rat, and he’ll be betrayed by someone at some point.

  6. Kieth

    Pec implants.

  7. “These pecs aren’t bad, but can I get a Bruce Jenner instead?”

  8. cajunhawk

    I should be running…

  9. His sweat says he’s been running, but his eyes say the gay thoughts caught up

  10. Eejut

    Mission Impossible 5: Vagina

  11. Brucer Jenner has better tits than this bitch…

  12. Mission Impossible 5
    Heterosexuality 0

  13. fred

    Director: So Tom, in this next scene you will be climbing the top of the highest building in the world with nothing but fishing wire as a safety.

    Tom: Jesus Christ, how much more of this crap do I have to put up with until I reach Level 19 and can leave this shithole with Xenu.

  14. ToyBoxOfGuns

    “I wonder what Xenu’s doing now?”

  15. Your mission if you choose to accept it is to find a male brassiere that lifts and separates.

  16. ThrewUpInMyMouth

    Mission Impossible 5: Hot Flashes

  17. Ripley's Believe It Or Not

    Tom has that look on his face that says he knows his next mission IS impossible: proving Xenu is real.

  18. Deva

    “Ok, stop looking at my tits.”

  19. tlmck

    Mission Impossible 6: Risky Business

  20. “My eyes are down here.”

  21. “I thought we had an agreement – no women on the set”

  22. The aging process is going to be so hilariously cringe-inducing on this one.

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