superficial

  1. dontkillthemessenger

    Cruise sideboob, Asian awkwardness, and black unimpressed-ness…. what more can a picture have?

  2. The guy in the Puma shirt. That’s the same look Elliot Rodger had in every single social situation he’s ever been in.

  3. dennis

    I think that Asian dude just heard his girlfriend agree to go to the scientologist gangbang, er, orientation.

  4. George P Burdell

    Ahhhh..Ching-Chong Ding-Dong

  5. Ronaldo

    Puma Shirt guy heard the ultimate Scientology pickup line.

  6. “What do you mean your son isn’t gay, Ms Wang?? Do you know how rich I am?”

  7. Tom Cruise is the Hulk now? Goddamnit, Joss Whedon…

  8. Mista Snazzy

    Tom: “So, you’re saying if I sign this autograph for you, I get to have your young, handsome brother in the blue Puma shirt for at least 3 days?”

    Young Asian girl: “Oh hell ya, Mr. Cruise. He’s all yours!”

    Young Asian boy in Puma shirt who knows he’s about to get anally popped: “Oh Shit. I didn’t sign up for this crap!!”

  9. Yup, just wear a shirt two sizes too small.
    That’s the ticket.
    Only people who know how full of shit you are, will care.
    Not that I think he’s full of shit.
    Just sayin’.

  10. Eejut

    Automobile???

  11. “You…made…Cruise…MAD! Now Cruise SMASH!!!”

  12. I’ve never seen someone say “TCLTC” with his eyes before. Well done, kid.

  13. Donald Sterling

    See, here’s a picture of you when you could still wear that shirt without any danger of a blowout.

  14. I don’t enjoy being hit on by the gays either..

  15. j/k

    Does your brother want go for a ride on my jet?

  16. rican

    Puma shirt guy, nor the black guy, were really down with the ass sale transaction puma shirt sister was making on behalf of puma shirt guy.

  17. Nbrein

    That is the look of someone that saw through the busting buttons and caught a glimpse of Tom cruise’s under-thetan. Now wishing he could vomit the memory.

  18. Bonky

    Imagine the shock Dong felt, after traveling all the way from Japan
    to meet his life long movie hero, that Tom Cruise was really no bigger
    than anyone else in his home prefecture.

  19. Blob

    Crint Eastrood

  20. “Now I’m in the mood for some young guy!”
    “Help!”
    “First, Show me the money!”

  21. Don’t make Tom Cruise horny. You wouldn’t like him when he’s horny.

  22. Ugh, that shirt. At this point I hope Tom Cruise isn’t gay, because he’s so bad at it.

  23. In every picture like this there is a black guy thinking “dyam that Asian just stole that, ‘In every picture like this there is a black…’ meme from us”

  24. Skeezix

    Puma boy does not show proper reverence for Mr Cruise…hand of L Ron Hubbard reaches out to steal his mortal soul…

  25. cc

    Someone said ‘Hey, Long Duk Dong!’.,..it was the first time in years he’d been recognized.

  26. All you want for an autograph is my brother’s anal virginity? Deal.

  27. Skel

    It was at that moment Hoang realized it wasn’t his girlfriend Tom Cruise wasn’t speaking about when he said “I’m down for some Asian.”

    • Skel

      It was at that moment Hoang realized it wasn’t his girlfriend Tom Cruise was speaking about when he said “I’m down for some Asian.

  28. Nick Nolte's Foot Callus

    Orientals are everywhere!

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