1. “Is this the Kim Kardashian? Am I doing it right?”

  2. Where did he get hair??

  3. CrashHell

    “Yeah, I’m a great quitter. It’s one of the few things I do well. I come from a long line of quitters. My father was a quitter, my grandfather was a quitter… I was raised to give up.”

  4. TooCoo

    Lucite (in)

  5. Darth Mung

    “Lupus? Is it lupus?”

  6. Vlad

    And now my hairpiece would like to make a statement…

  7. “This reminds me of the time I ran into Kobe Bryant in the Lakers locker room.”

  8. Raaaaaaaa

    Loop…as in loop pile carpet? He’s getting an award based on the pile of his hair rug, isn’t he

  9. KC

    I accept this award for “best rug” on behalf Mr. Shatner and the Hair Club for Men.

  10. “I don’t know exactly what happened. I just woke up one morning and there was a black vine growing out of my forehead.”

  11. Pine Table Fever

    George, it’s cool you were here to accept the award and everything, but you could have left your glass dildo at home or at least under the table.

  12. One of the first signs of lupus is talking out of your forehead.

  13. He’s obviously talking through his third inner eye. What a mystic!

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