“Oh! I think they’re dropping!”

“If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands!”

(I can’t believe these assholes circumsized me last night. What’s WITH these people?)

“And I was like dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, oh
Like dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, no
Like dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, oh
I thought you’d always be mine, mine.”

Protection against the random bris. Safety first!

Such a spiritual young man. Is this his Sermon on the Mount?

A sequined hanky in his back pocket. Is that the new signal for ‘I’m a twink’?

“Damn! I told that boy to stay the hell out of my closet.” says Usher somewhere backstage.

Is it possible for anyone to do a live show without grabbing their crotch!!!???

Usher makes him wear a ball gag now?

How much money does it take to erase embarrassment?

Life’s all about freedom, y’all. And being true to thine own self. You can quote me on that.

Look out, backup singer! You’re about to stumble over Usher’s cock!

I touched myself, Usher! I’m a man now! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

WTF is up with all the stupid, talentless little pipsqueaks grabbing their crotches all the time???? It wasn’t sexy when Michael Jackson did it a quarter of a century ago and it is even less so now with the mindless copycats who can’t stand on their own talent. F*ck the music industry and these pathetic manufactured pop stars!!!!!!

“I’m going to grab it, all right! I just have to find it first.”

“I just want to wank where Jesus wanked, can’t you leave me alone?!”

Hey Doofus, 1985 called and they want their high-top tennis shoes back!

Awww, he spent so much time bedazzling his little sneakers he forgot to go take a tinkle before he had to go on stage.

He’s like a little Liberace Jesus. Now could someone PLEASE nail him to a cross!

I’m going to file this under ‘conspiracy to commit infanticide’.

Vagisil

For the Lord himself will come down from Canada, with the voice of a castrati and with the sequin handkerchief of justice. And the teen girls will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up with them in the clouds of glitter to meet the Lord in the air. But we will not reach him, for we do not have a G-5. So it has been written.

So Jesus grabbed his balls, ate pringles and wore a ball gag?

Jesus told him to wear the sparkly cape.

one would think the Deity would have better taste in clothes.

Don’t worry about that, it’s just reflex. He does that every time there’s a black guy behind him.

Mouth open, hand on crotch, other hand on ass…looks like the Bieber love-doll that Usher had custom-built is finally ready.

…And this is where my penis should be. If I had one.