1. Colin

    WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE OUT OF GIN!?

  2. JC

    “Look at that awful mother over there! She’s barely exploiting her children!”

  3. YoMamma

    Has her face always looked so smashed in? Wonky eye?

  4. kill it with fire!

  5. I read about close encounters of the third kind but this scared the shit out of me!

  6. Damn it! Who fed Gizmo after midnight?

  7. Senor Trout

    ‘It costs how much extra to dye the eyebrows?…Fuck that, noone will notice.’

  8. Just spotted her next John.

  9. EricLr

    Get ready to run Allie, I think I smell a producer!

  10. Kate Gosslin circa. 30 minutes from now.

  11. ♫ Sactus!! ♪
    ♪DOMINUS!!♫

  12. Elaine

    You know that video of the guy getting hit in the face with a water balloon in slow motion? Her face looks like that’s always happening to her.

  13. Jade

    I thought Michael Jackson was dead?

  14. El Jefe

    Was it a 2 for 1 deal on the shitty blonde straw hair?

  15. Do_Freebird

    Wow, her looks aer going FAST. Not that she was much to look at to begin with.

  16. EmmaWatson's Vagina

    so Lindsay Lohan has a daughter

  17. Frank Burns

    “You mean exploiting your drug addicted child isn’t the key to an eternally youthful appearance? Aww, dangit!”

  18. vgirl

    Where did her nose go?

    • Jezebel

      Cocaine is eating her face, and leaving no scraps for little Ali to munch on.

    • Sliver

      This is what happens when you stare in the mirror for too long…certain things start looking too big and need to be tweaked. Advice….don’t be so vain.

  19. Truly, the succubi walk among us. Except this one sucks the life out of her kids.

  20. What the fuck, I thought dead people were supposed to be laid horizontally…wait…WHAT?…she’s not? Goddamnit, there goes the weekend.

  21. “And, you know, the thing about a shark… she’s got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll’s eyes. When she comes at ya, doesn’t seem to be living… until she bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then… ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin”.

  22. Rob

    She’s got a dent in her face. Someone should hammer those out.

  23. tlmck

    “Dammit Lindsay! You cannot get glowing reports from the judge! The tabloids will not pay for that kind of story!”

  24. Swearin

    “Nobody drink, her vision is based on gin!”

  25. kuhkuhkuh

    “dammit Crunk! We’ll never kill the emperor at this rate”

  26. Jack Ketch

    Blonde hair extensions look awful on someone of this age, and how many nosejobs has she had ?? I’d say at least 3, gah.

  27. Perry Tyler

    What in the fuck, shoot it before it breeds.

  28. She looks like a Skeksis.

  29. Your Momma's Valtrex

    Kim Kardashian’s ass crack in the background.

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