“Anyone seen Nick Nolte?”

Dr Who and the Technicolor Dreamcoat

He’s trying to remember how many concealed weapons he’s carrying, in case they ask.

“Dude, where’s my car?”

The wrinkled old white guy with the bull-dyke looking wife saying it all with his thumb…

They let this guy fly?

“Why am I traveling with Philip Seymour Hoffman?”

Layers.

He’s just walking around with our nation’s nuclear launch codes. No need to panic.

“I’ve been standing here for three days and I still can’t find out which gate the space shuttle is departing from.”

Tango and Smashed.

gary busey dont need a plane.
gary busey just needs a runway.

You just know the only thing in that secure briefcase is a flask of his own urine.

Shit, he’s coming here. Seriously. For a Buddy Holly tribute. Maybe they’ll persuade him to take Holly’s plane home.

“now where is that latin american fellow that told me to transport this 30lb suitcase in exchange for free subway?”

so that’s how he gets his face to do that face

LAX?! I was supposed to get off at JFK!

Dazed and confused, the golden years.