superficial

  1. That’s the same look both his face and his nipple give to Ryan Seacrest…

  2. joe

    Three women, eight tits.

  3. Nannynannybooboo

    So who has bigger implants? Simon or Carmen?

  4. biff

    Moooooooooobs.

  5. Pictured: All six prostitutes Simon hired that evening.

  6. Contusion

    Does this count as a “see-through?”

  7. He really needs to invest in a decent bra. If he keeps letting them hang like that, he’s going to end up with some wicked back problems.

  8. Cock Dr

    I sense that he actually wants us all to see those moobs, and that’s just another reason to hate his guts.

  9. Why is Kate Middleton in the audience?

  10. Thin wool shirt + some well-timed camera flashes + the right angle = too much sexy

  11. Yeah, I’ve got man boobs, and I’m fucking Carmen Electra. Jealous?”

  12. “Okay… one… two… say cheese!

    Thanks, kids! Thanks, Bitchtits!”

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