Sightings

This Is The Last Time You’ll See Jessica Simpson Looking ‘Fat,’ According To Jessica Simpson

By: The Superficial / April 10, 2012
Last month, we saw a pregnant Jessica Simpson posing nude for the April issue of Elle which apparently hit newsstands because here she is pimping the issue on Twitter while making the most ridiculous statement she'll ever make in her life. And, yes, that's counting the time she asked if the … More »

Here’s Tim Tebow Getting A Mani/Pedi

By: The Superficial / April 5, 2012
Above is former Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow getting a mani/pedi in West Hollywood on Tuesday. Below are three beautiful women he chose not to have sex with. I'm sure it's just a coincidence. Photo: Courtesy of TMZ.com … More »

Laurie From ‘That 70s Show’ Says She Was Framed

By: The Superficial / April 4, 2012
After being arrested for spousal abuse over the weekend, That 70s Show actress Lisa Robin Kelly is now claiming she was set up by her male roommate who beat the shit out of himself just to get her arrested, so have I mentioned these people are drug addicts? These people are drug addicts. More »

Country Music’s Mad At Ashton Kutcher

By: The Superficial / April 3, 2012
For some reason, somebody thought it'd be a great idea to invite Ashton Kutcher, the guy who fucked over Demi Moore by banging 23-year-olds on their wedding anniversary, to Sunday's American Country Music Awards to present Female Vocalist of the Year to Miranda Lambert which he did, but only after showing … More »

Chris Brown Tweets Support For Trayvon Martin. Oh, Goddammit…

By: The Superficial / March 30, 2012
Spike Lee being a fucking idiot aside, things were starting to turn around in the Trayvon Martin case. ABC News obtained footage that showed a clearly non-injured George Zimmerman despite conveniently leaked police reports claiming he was punched repeatedly and his skull bashed against the curb. From there, … More »

Octomom Finally Did Porn To Keep Her House

By: The Superficial / March 27, 2012
When Octomom fired 14 children out of her vagina, she just assume the TV money would come rolling in and she could simply pay an army of nannies to raise her uterus droppings army she only squeezed out to get all that TV money. Except Octomom failed to factor in America's amazing capacity to … More »

George Clooney Got Arrested

By: The Superficial / March 16, 2012
George Clooney was arrested in Washington, DC today for protesting outside the Sudanese embassy, except none of that's even scandalous at all because he wanted to get arrested to bring exposure to his cause and was smiling the whole time. But what is important is that I've discovered George Clooney testifying to … More »

Peter Dinklage Is The Best At What He Does, But What He Does Isn’t Very Nice

By: The Superficial / March 12, 2012
I want to eff the Internet so hard right now... [Ed. Note: Quick bit of site news that none of you will read because why the hell would you ever stop looking at the top pic. (No, really, what are you doing down here?) I'm without a Photo Boy this week, yet as this post … More »

JUSTIN BIEBER IS CHEATING ON SELENA GOMEZ WITH TAYLOR SWIFT!! OMGZ!!!!

By: The Superficial / March 9, 2012
There are two simple rules to the gossip racket: 1. If a woman retains more than .5 oz of water, she's pregnant. 2. If two famous people stand next to each other, they fucked. So with that in mind and armed with the information that reports of his $10.8 million bang-mansion were … More »

Jessica Simpson Posed Nude For ‘Elle.’ Pregnant.

By: The Superficial / March 7, 2012
Here's a pregnant Jessica Simpson posing nude (Full shot here.) for the April issue of Elle if posing nude means they de-jowled her head and slapped it on Demi Moore's body because it was cheaper than airbrushing out nacho cheese burns. Regardless, Jessica confirms she's having a girl, but more … More »

And Here’s The Snooki’s Pregnant Cover

By: The Superficial / March 7, 2012
Like clockwork here's the Us Weekly cover confirming Snooki's pregnancy and engagement even though she basically already did that by walking around with a giant rock on her finger Monday night. At any rate, here's how Snooki plans to shat out her fur-baby and spend its first moments of life. More »

Paula Deen Wanted To Dress Up ‘N-ggers’ And Make Them Tap Dance Like Shirley Temple. Allegedly.

By: The Superficial / March 6, 2012
"Is that a negro? Bring it here. I desire jazz hands." Paula Deen and her brother Bubba Hiers (This story's great already, I know.) are currently being sued for sexual harrasment by Lisa Jackson the former general manager of their jointly-owned restaurant Uncle Bubba's Oyster House. Along with claims that Bubba openly watched porn … More »

Thank You, Ralph McQuarrie (1929 – 2012)

By: The Superficial / March 5, 2012
Ralph McQuarrie, the legendary science-fiction concept artist who gave George Lucas' original Star Wars trilogy its iconic, timeless look, died Saturday at 82. And for those of you who haven't spent 98% of your life obsessed with Star Wars like I still am (Did you know they made McQuarrie concept figures?! … More »

Andrew Breitbart & Anthony Weiner Were Going To Do A CNN Show Together. Come Again?

By: The Superficial / March 2, 2012
If this thing wasn't going to be called "CrossStream," we're truly lost as a nation. Just so a certain segment of The Superficial's audience believes this, here's a report from FOX Nation: The Network Jesus Would Watch that says Andrew Breitbart and Anthony Weiner, the Democratic congressman he brought down by … More »

Good Morning, Kate Upton and Other News

By: Photo Boy / March 2, 2012
Posted by Photo Boy - Alex Rodriguez has a Latina option now. [theCHIVE] - Jon Hamm tells AMC executives to eat a dick. [Huffington Post] - Jennifer Aniston says she doesn't need kids to be happy, which you're supposed to interpret as 'I'm still in love with Brad.' [Dlisted] … More »

Chris Brown’s Mom Is Tired Of His Bullsh*t

By: The Superficial / February 16, 2012
In the immediate aftermath of his attack on Rihanna, Chris Brown's mom Joyce Hawkins, herself a victim of domestic abuse, basically held his hand through the whole ordeal and told everyone how he's such a good kid so go easy on him. Surprisingly, this turned Chris into an even bigger spoiled brat … More »

Alexander Skarsgard Went To Toy Fair. Why Not?

By: The Superficial / February 14, 2012
"If I drive for you, you get your money. You tell me where we start, where we're going, where we're going afterwards. I give you five minutes when we get there. Anything happens in that five minutes and I'm yours. No matter what. Anything a minute on either side of that and you're on your … More »

Adele Looks Different

By: The Superficial / February 14, 2012
Here's Adele on the March cover of Vogue where you'll be surprised to learn she's a svelte, thin-faced, large-breasted model unlike whoever the hell this impostor is at the Grammys. Nice try, pregnant Gillian Anderson. Photos: Vogue, INFdaily, Getty, WENN … More »

Ke$ha’s Just Your Average, Everyday, Penis Costume-Loving Praying Mantis

By: The Superficial / February 8, 2012
And Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs. Did I not mention that? I entirely forgot Ke$ha was still a thing, but apparently Glamour didn't because here she is talking to them about devouring men after she mates and/or making them wear giant cock costumes for her amusement. So basically she's a … More »

Jesus Looks Like This Now and Other News

By: Photo Boy / February 8, 2012
Posted by Photo Boy - Rosie Huntington-Whiteley doesn't want you to forget Valentine's Day. [theCHIVE] - Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke knows that Sparkledick > Terrible Plot. [Huffington Post] - Jennifer Aniston is so annoyed by the Brangelina feud rumors that she brought them up again in an interview. [Dlisted] … More »

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