Sightings

Justin Bieber Made Rob Ford Relapse

Photo Boy / May 1, 2014

Posted by Photo Boy

When Justin Bieber decides to be a colossal shithead, he really doesn’t pull punches, and it seems there was no exception when he decided to taunt Toronto Mayor Rob Ford for his hilarious and not-at-all tragic to an entire city of anguished citizens drug habit.
Not long after,… More »


George Clooney Got Engaged

Photo Boy / April 28, 2014

“Mr. Clooney, you’re aware that marriage means no new vagina, correct?
“I’m sorry, you said what now?”
Posted by Photo Boy
I guess today is going to just be crazy old white guys be crazy day with the news that George Clooney got engaged to Amal Alamuddin. Here’s as close to a confirmation that’s out… More »


Katy Perry Did Jewface

Photo Boy / April 25, 2014

Posted by Photo Boy

If you’re like me, and you’ve always wondered what would happen if the creators of Jackass got drunk, had unprotected sex with the creators of Punk’d, then decided to abort the hellspawn they produced, then you’re in luck, because Katy Perry’s new video for her song ‘Birthday’ is that… More »


Lindsay Lohan Is Broke (Again)

The Superficial / April 2, 2014

Back in July, Oprah paid Lindsay Lohan $2 million to appear on a reality show that accurately portrays her as the fuck up she is. So the fact that I’m writing this post almost nine months later instead of the very next day is a miracle in and of itself. I’m man enough to admit… More »


Here’s What People In ‘The Avengers: Age of Ultron’ Might Look Like And/Or Punch

The Superficial / March 19, 2014

Makes you wonder how much faster her sisters could’ve killed Heath Ledger with all that power, doesn’t it? I know.
When you own an entire network like Disney does, you can use it whenever you want to shamelessly pimp your products however and whenever you want. Which is exactly what Disney did last night by… More »


Our Long National Lena Dunham Naked Nightmare Might Be Over

The Superficial / March 11, 2014

“Wait. Did a bounty hunter just pull a thermal detonator on someone who wouldn’t pay 50,000 for a Wookiee? If so, I’m gonna queef.”
Because sometimes it’s fun to dress The Penquin in fancy dresses and take his picture, Lena Dunham is the cover interview for the April issue of Glamour where she drops the… More »


Vadgity Chipmunk’s Hee-Haw Hootenanny!

The Superficial / January 30, 2014

Because it apparently takes 24 hours to edit Miley Cyrus twerking on a horse, here’s her MTV Unplugged performance with Madonna that aired last night. And if anyone wants to start throwing around the word “demonic,” maybe start here because as soon as I finished watching this, a faceless baby floated in front of me… More »


Aw, Shit, Here Comes The Hardest Motherf*cker On The Planet

The Superficial / January 23, 2014

When you hire a lawyer like Roy Black who famously helped William Kennedy Smith duck rape charges in 1991, so I have no idea why Justin Bieber would have his number on hand, none at all, you should probably be very concerned if he doesn’t tell you to roll down your fucking sleeves and sto… More »


Miley Cyrus Is Going To Stick To This Vagina Thing, See Where It Goes

The Superficial / January 8, 2014

In case you were wondering how Miley Cyrus is going to change things up in 2014, she’s not unless you count seeing how far up her vulva she can wedge her leotard without splitting herself into two. Which, now that I think about it, is why Justin Bieber exists, so forget I spoke. Anyway, I… More »


Tila Tequila Has A New Sex Tape Coming Out, Is A Marketing Genius

The Superficial / December 16, 2013

Up until last week it seemed like Tila Tequila had fallen off the face of the earth if not returned to Smurf Village where Papa Smurf had to answer some tough questions about his time in Nam. But then she claimed the Jews killed Paul Walker with their Illuminati powers and suddenly she was the… More »


Katy Perry Almost Committed Suicide Because of Russell Brand Divorce

The Superficial / October 1, 2013

In a new interview with Billboard, Katy Perry admits she contemplated suicide after her divorce from Russell Brand. And if you’re wondering if she could seriously be that stupid, in the next paragraph she calls John Mayer a genius, so yes. Yes, she could.
Elsewhere, Perry pointedly confronts her turbulent recent history. The line “You… More »


Sydney Leathers Giving Myla Sinanaj A Lapdance Is Now Part Of Your Consciousness Forever

Photo Boy / September 17, 2013

Posted by Photo Boy
While Fish is off exploring the new maps (That’s a thing I’ve heard people who play games excitedly talk about, so I chose to reference it in an attempt to seem savvy.) in Grand Theft Auto V, I decided to destroy a piece of, if not your entire soul with these… More »


Ben Affleck’s Getting A Divorce

Photo Boy / September 17, 2013

Posted by Photo Boy
So not only is Ben Affleck goddamn Batman now, he’s also just been cast opposite Emily Ratajkowski in the adaptation of Gillian Flynn’s novel ‘Gone Girl.’ E! News reports:
Ratajkowski will play Andie, a beautiful college student who Nick Dunne (Ben Affleck) has an affair with before choosing to help hi… More »


Courtney Stodden Got Evicted From ‘Celebrity Big Brother,’ God Save The Queen

The Superficial / September 12, 2013

Courtney Stodden got evicted from Celebrity Big Brother last night. And since I don’t know what any of that means or if matters to a single person, I posted pics of her big fake breasts anyway and will simply assume this is all some sort of British Parliamentary procedure where Baby Prince George Alexander Chrysanthemum… More »


There Are Demi Lovato Nude Photos. Yay?

The Superficial / August 20, 2013

Someone is reportedly trying to sell over 20 nude photos of Demi Lovato in “compromising positions,” according to Radar who apparently talks like Downtown Abbey now:
Radar has been unable to verify the breast-baring images are authentic, however the woman in the images has some tell-tale signs suggesting it is indeed the ex-Sonny with a… More »


If I Could Ask God One Question, It’s Why The Hell Did You Let Justin Bieber Have Sex With This?

The Superficial / August 16, 2013

Here’s Selena Gomez performing in Vancouver last night where apparently she added sexy rope shit to her show just in case everyone wasn’t sure how awesome her body is and that Justin Bieber had absolutely no fucking business going near it. Except, wait, hold on. I’ve just been handed new information that makes me regret… More »


Marky Mark Wants To Be Iron Man

The Superficial / August 16, 2013

“Hey, Jahvis. Wanna know why my ahms shoot freakin’ laser beams?
Because I don’t masturbate.” *skreeeeee-BOOOSH*
In a recent interview, Mark Wahlberg revealed that he’d love to be the next Iron Man which is, of course, ridiculous on its face because Tony Stahk ain’t no freakin’ Southie. Even more ridiculous is why Marky Mark believe… More »


Prince Is On Twitter

The Superficial / August 14, 2013

During the 2010 release of Prince’s album 20TEN, he explained to the Mirror that the Internet was over which was for the best because it was just filling our heads with numbers. These were actual words that Prince spoke which makes it all the more amazing that the same person is not only tweeting now,… More »


Chris Brown Had A Seizure Because Y’All Be Hatin’

The Superficial / August 12, 2013

Chris Brown’s suffered from seizures ever since he was a small boy which technically is something one should be sympathetic to, but hoping he ironically bit his tongue off is a valid response, too. (You can’t see it because you have sin in your heart, but Jesus is nodding in agreement right now. And dunking… More »


Bruce Willis Called ‘Lazy And Greedy’ By Man Starting Production On His 11th Sequel

Photo Boy / August 7, 2013

“Vhy are you not speaking to Bruce? Did he vuck your maid, too?”
Posted by Photo Boy
Full Disclosure: Having recently declared A Good Day To Die Hard as the death knell to my man love for Bruce Willis, I have to go on record here to say that Sylvester Stallone calling anyone “greedy” or… More »


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