Red Carpet

The 2015 Golden Globe Awards

By: The Superficial / January 12, 2015

I probably should’ve checked if there are any more awards show this month because here’s the rest of The 2015 Golden Globes that we may or may not have blown 75% of our photo budget on already. In our defense, it has boobs in it, and a Ruth Wilson pic that justifies whatever it i… More »


Golden Globes: Good God, Jessica Chastain

By: The Superficial / January 12, 2015

Here’s Jessica Chastain looking on point at last night’s Golden Globes after spending the week talking about how difficult high school was for her and sharing an old high school photo to inspire others. Which was a powerful message to young girls that anyone’s dreams can come true provided you’re already a beautiful redhead your… More »


Golden Globes: Kate Hudson Gets Her Own Post

By: The Superficial / January 12, 2015

Most of you don’t come to this site to hear moving, “totally unprepared” acceptance speeches – We cry about those after hours. (OMG, Amy Adams, you guys.) – so here’s Kate Hudson looking goddamn fantastic at the Golden Globes last night because she’s single now and famous penises aren’t going to just fall right into… More »


Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Pregnant Again

By: Photo Boy / January 8, 2015

Posted by Photo Boy

For most of her life, Jennifer Love Hewitt had a singular purpose. A purpose that made her believe telling guys she preselected three engagement rings for them to choose from wouldn’t send them sprinting back to exes who have drug problems. But through the magic of struggling actors who’ll… More »


Giada De Laurentiis Denies Banging Every Guy She’s Ever Been On TV With

By: Photo Boy / January 8, 2015

Posted by Photo Boy

Star magazine would publish a cover photo of you in a coffin if they thought you’d buy it, so it’s not a stretch to think when they heard Giada De Laurentiis‘ was getting divorced they went “Okay, let’s start with ‘she fucked everyone,’ then work our way backwards from… More »


Blake Lively Gave Birth

By: Photo Boy / January 6, 2015

“You’re gonna be skinny again now, right baby?”
“You’re gonna make a movie that doesn’t tank now, right baby?”

Posted by Photo Boy

I’ll admit I’ve never been as preoccupied with Blake Lively as Fish so terrifyingly is, but she shat out Ryan Reynolds‘ kid over the holidays and I… More »


Charli XCX’s Breasts Are Back

By: The Superficial / December 19, 2014

I still don’t know who or what a Charli XCX is, or why her name is a Bratz doll, but I do know you people will click the hell out of her breasts, so here they are at the Jingle Ball in Chicago last night because I show you the occasional boob, and then you… More »


Kate Upton Wins ‘Sexiest Woman’ At PEOPLE Awards

By: The Superficial / December 19, 2014

Kate Upton won the PEOPLE Magazine Award for Sexiest Woman last night and couldn’t look more boring doing it, but you’ll notice that didn’t stop me from posting about it, or PEOPLE from finding literally anybody else, because we both bow at the altar of SEO. It is the one true God. *slices open palm,More »


Jennifer Aniston Doesn’t Get Why Everyone’s Obsessed With Her Body

By: Photo Boy / December 16, 2014

Posted by Photo Boy

Fish and I have historically¹ held differing opinions on Jennifer Aniston. I find her attractive, while he prefers the company of his illustrated books and his things. *watches him rearrange figurines on his desk for Tuesday positioning* What we both agree on, however, is that it’s kind of ridiculou… More »


What The Hell Is A Charli XCX?

By: The Superficial / December 16, 2014

I have no idea who or what a Charli XCX is, but everybody apparently lost their shit yesterday over her outfits for the Billboard Women In Music Luncheon and Jingle Ball So here are those for you to potentially misplace your own shit over and then maybe have a little treasure hunt trying to find… More »


A Child Has Shed Its Hayden Panettiere Cocoon

By: The Superficial / December 15, 2014

Fun Fact: This pic is from August. Four months ago August. She’s dead. She died.

In defiance of the laws of physics, Hayden Panettiere gave birth to a baby girl, Kaya Evdokia, last Tuesday, according to PEOPLE, who spoke very little about Hayden’s current state because housewives don’t want to read about a… More »


Here’s Kim Kardashian’s Naked Butt Painted By A Man’s Penis

By: The Superficial / December 12, 2014

Kim Kardashian‘s naked butt on the cover of Paper Magazine will forever be an iconic image of our generation (and the harbinger of its destruction), so why wouldn’t it be immortalized in art? Which brings us to Danish artist Uwe Max Jensen who painted Kim’s now infamous cover using his penis as the brush. Yup. More »


Ariana Grande Makes People Carry Her Like A Baby

By: The Superficial / December 11, 2014

Ariana Grande‘s reputation for being a tiny Mariah Carey is no secret except now’s the part where the rumors of her demands have reached almost Tracy Jordan-like levels. And I believe every single one of them. Life & Style reports:

“Her new rule is that she has to be carried — literally carried… More »


Angelina Jolie Is A ‘Minimally Talented Spoiled Brat': The Sony Emails

By: The Superficial / December 10, 2014

I work in the media, so it’s easy to forget that people actually live rich, full lives (Sometimes even outdoors. The actual outside!) where they don’t obsess over the tiniest minutiae like studio infighting and how badly Aaron Sorkin wants to feel Tom Cruise shove an iPhone 6 up his ass. Which brings me to… More »


The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 12.9.14

By: Photo Boy / December 9, 2014

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which leads with Charlotte McKinney again, this time on the set of Joe Dirt 2, which you can either take as a not-very-subtle indictment of Hollywood’s inability to produce anything original, or just boobs. We’ve also got Sam Micelli because I know most of you don’t really care… More »


Taylor Swift Made Out With Karlie Kloss ‘Allegedly’

By: The Superficial / December 8, 2014

While I was too busy covering real stories like how Hilary Duff‘s body’s going to be found in a wedding gown beneath Aaron Carter‘s shed, the Internet was losing its shit over a photo of Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss making out (below) even though they basically got married during the Victoria’s Secret Fashion ShowMore »


Miley Cyrus Made Out With Paris Hilton

By: The Superficial / December 8, 2014

Miley Cyrus is always looking for some stupid, new edgy shit to do, and what’s more stupid and edgy than sticking your tongue in a petri dish of death and disease? Which is probably the nicest thing I’ll ever say about Paris Hilton‘s mouth. The holidays just bring it out of me. Page Six reports:… More »


Krysten Ritter Is Your New Marvel Person

By: The Superficial / December 5, 2014

After confirming Benedict Cumberbatch as Doctor Strange, Marvel announced that Krysten Ritter landed the title role of Jessica Jones for its upcoming Netflix series. I should probably mention Alexandra Daddario was also up the part, but mostly so I can link to her nude scene in True Detective because the SEO game don’t sleep, son. More »


The 2014 American Music Awards

By: The Superficial / November 24, 2014

Now that we’ve seen Nakedsaurus, Rise of The Sasquatch Nip Guardians, Cry For Me, Justintina, and BUTTFORCE 9000, here’s the rest of The 2014 American Music Awards which you’ll probably notice contains a disproportionate amount of Kate Beckinsale pics even though she’s not a musical artist. Like anyone else there was. Check your privilege. More »


AMAs: Selena Gomez Didn’t Wear A Bra

By: The Superficial / November 24, 2014

I wasn’t joking about gunning through these, so here’s Selena Gomez at the AMAs where she wore a braless dress and cry-sang about Justin Bieber because 22-year-olds are dumb. Congratulations, you are now the foremost expert on all things Selena Gomez and may now demand the severed, gilded hands of your co-workers’ children as tribute. More »


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