Red Carpet

Jennifer Lawrence Is Banging Chris Martin, Gwyneth Paltrow’s Chris Martin

The Superficial | August 15, 2014 - 6:27 pm

“Who’s gettin’ GOOPed now, bitch? WHA?”

Gwyneth Paltrow is a wound tight, meticulous of curator macrobiotic living filtered through a sexy, breezy pashmina that only costs $25,000, so any single, working mom can afford it. Jennifer Lawrence… well, Jennifer Lawrence doesn’t give a fuck. She’ll fart, burp, make a demon face on the… More »

Carmen Electra’s Breasts Are A Happy Post

The Superficial | August 12, 2014 - 1:33 pm

The last few posts have been about suicide, child molestation and sexual assault, but since the night is always darkest just before the dawn, here are Carmen Electra’s breasts at The Expendables 3 premiere because I’ll never forsake you. Unless it’d be really funny then I won’t even hesitate. You’ll be like “Ah, shit!”
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The 2014 Teen Choice Awards

The Superficial | August 11, 2014 - 11:01 am

Someone just spotted Kim Kardashian.

I’ve grown old enough where I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be a teenager and now hate them for their youthful vigor and freedom to make stupid choices with abandon. Case in point: I once drove an hour to the nearest Best Buy to buy Limp Bizkit’s SignificantMore »

Guys, I’m Pretty Sure Megan Fox Wants To Bang Shia LaBeouf Again

The Superficial | August 8, 2014 - 11:14 am

Earlier in the week, Megan Fox made it a point to let the world know she’s not having sex with Brian Austin Green. On top of that, she made a passive aggressive jab that he wants more kids because “he doesn’t have to do any of the work” and then followed that up by naming… More »

Megan Fox Tells Moviegoers To ‘F*ck Off’

The Superficial | August 4, 2014 - 12:35 pm

Back in her Transformers heyday, Megan Fox had a small problem with opening her mouth and letting words come out of it. Words like “Hitler” and, well, basically any thought in her head. But, now that she’s humbled herself and crawled back to Michael Bay, she’s been a tame, cooperative actress who isn’t already openly… More »

Megan Fox Isn’t George Zimmerman

The Superficial | July 30, 2014 - 2:45 pm

Because you don’t come to this site to read about how small your dick is for cowering like a pussy behind guns, here’s Megan Fox at the Mexico City premiere of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles where I’ll assume the promotional poster featured the Turtles chopping off the heads of their enemies. Or they’re just… More »

How Hot Did Selena Gomez Look While Justin Bieber Got Punched In The Face?

The Superficial | July 30, 2014 - 12:33 pm

Chipmunk hooker hot? I’m going with chipmunk hooker hot.

Photos: Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Ivon Miguel/AKM-GSI, Pacific Coast News, Splash NewsMore »

Beyonce’s Moving Out

The Superficial | July 29, 2014 - 11:32 am

Yesterday, we found out that Jay Z cheated on Beyonce with Rihanna which was also the reason for Solange’s elevator attack if we’re all going to start believing lizard people talking points now. Why make them go through the trouble of secretly putting mind control in our water? That’s my motto. Anyway, now comes word… More »

Comic-Con: ‘Avengers: Age of Ultron,’ And Oh Yeah, ‘Ant-Man,’ I Guess

The Superficial | July 28, 2014 - 11:42 am

Considering they have no less than 20 movies coming out at a time, Marvel gets the prime time-slot in Comic-Con’s Hall H where this year they wheeled out the entire cast of The Avengers: Age of Ultron – minus pregnant ScarJo – after an awkwardly brief Ant-Man panel. And if you’re wondering how to tell… More »

Comic-Con: ‘Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice’

The Superficial | July 28, 2014 - 10:56 am

Despite a release date that’s almost two years from now, DC Comics had to have something to show at Comic-Con or Marvel would walk right over them even more than they already are, so Zack Snyder showed up on Saturday and amazingly put up a fight by dropping an official photo of Wonder Woman’s costumeMore »

Lindsay Lohan Actually Looks Good? WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE! And Other News

The Superficial | July 27, 2014 - 9:57 pm

- Jennifer Lawrence might be single again. [Lainey Gossip]

- Aretha Franklin will eat her goddamn burger wherever she wants, Johnny Rockets. [Dlisted]

– So the axe goes up her butt? Is that what I’m supposed to take away from this? [Fishwrapper]

- Sunday Is A Good Day ForMore »

Comic-Con Day 2: I’m In Love With A Giant

The Superficial | July 26, 2014 - 12:38 pm

Welcome to Day Two of our Comic-Con coverage which I’m telling myself will justify beefing this Friday to go see Guardians of The Galaxy and spending way too long writing a dick-joke laden review of it. Lies are fun. Anyway, let’s get to it. I’ve still got Most Important People to put up when I… More »

Comic-Con Day 1: Hope You Like Chins

The Superficial | July 25, 2014 - 8:55 am

Comic-Con officially started yesterday, and the excitement was palpable provided your idea of excitement is looking at chins because literally two of the biggest stories are chin hair-based. I’m not even joking. So here’s a quick rundown of Day 1, and all the lower portion of the face information that dwells within:

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Blake Lively GOOPed Early

The Superficial | July 22, 2014 - 2:21 pm

If I had to list Blake Lively’s accomplishments in order, they’d be the following: … More »

Where’d Selena Gomez’s Implants Go?

The Superficial | July 21, 2014 - 2:31 pm

Because people like me will never understand how breasts work (Chlorophyll?), there’s been a lot of talk recently about Selena Gomez getting implants. Except here she is over the weekend looking noticeably less chestier which means she probably didn’t get new boobs. Unless… she forgot to do that thing where she sticks her thumb in… More »

Gwyneth Paltrow Has A Boyfriend? Okay…

The Superficial | July 17, 2014 - 2:05 pm

It’s no secret that Gwyneth Paltrow had tons of affairs while surreptitiously monogamous, but that was before she was locked in a battle to see who can be the most courteous separatist and still have sex with other people because it’s important to prove she lives on transcendental plane of conscious that extends far beyond… More »

Selena Gomez Got A New Tattoo

The Superficial | July 17, 2014 - 11:27 am

If there’s one thing that sticks it to your ex while he plows his way through aquatic ass-beasts, it’s a new tattoo, so here’s Selena Gomez showing off hers on Instagram. It apparently translates to “Love Yourself First” which is incredible because that’s literally all I do in the sack. It’s practically my signature move,… More »

Chrissy Teigen Is All You Need To Know About The ESPYs And Other News

The Superficial | July 16, 2014 - 11:04 pm

- I already went nerd crazy with Lady Thor, so here’s a whole bunch of Avengers 2 info/pics. [Lainey Gossip]

- Lana Del Rey doesn’t want anyone to listen to her music now. Done. [Dlisted]

– Wait, the butt makes coffee, too? [theCHIVE]

- Rose McGowan knows Michael JacksonMore »

Christian Author Farrah Abraham Wants You To Buy Her Pocket Pussy

The Superficial | July 14, 2014 - 2:18 pm

You probably know Farrah Abraham from her upcoming book on Christian parenting, so you shouldn’t be surprised to learn that like most Christ-loving authors, she also has a line of erotic sex toys which she launched over the weekend by licking them right in the rubber vulva. A move she learned from none other than… More »

It’s Safe To Ask Katherine Heigl If She’s Difficult Now, She Can’t Do Anything

The Superficial | July 14, 2014 - 12:43 pm

For those of you don’t remember Katherine Heigl – which is understandable – she was once an aspiring actress who catapulted to fame by starring in Knocked Up and the ABC drama Grey’s Anatomy only to publicly shit on both projects before starring in a series of repetitive romantic comedies with each one tanking harder… More »

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