Red Carpet

Mariah Carey’s Cleavage Is For The Children Or Something

By: Photo Boy / May 30, 2014
Posted by Photo Boy So remember earlier when Fish posted this great video of super talented actors doing funny impressions of each other, because they're beloved and humble people, whose impromptu moments during what is surely a grueling press tour provide a little insight that they aren't complete dicks or egomaniacs on the inside? More »

Uma Thurman’s Toes Are Quentin Tarantino’s Now

By: The Superficial / May 29, 2014
Uma Thurman is barefoot in these photos which is exactly all the evidence I need to believe she's rebounded with Quentin Tarantino after leaving French financier Arpad Busson last month. You could've shown me footage of Quentin's penis visibly in Uma's vagina, and I still… More »

Gwyneth Paltrow: ‘Reading Mean Internet Comments Is Just Like War’

By: The Superficial / May 29, 2014
(l to r) 1. Private Witherspoon, a 20-year-veteran who survived several online jokes about her chin, but in body only. Her family says she's never been the same person since and often suffers from night terrors and alcohol abuse. 2. A pretentious cunt. In my haste to slap together a link post this morning, I… More »

Brad Pitt Got Punched In The Face

By: The Superficial / May 29, 2014
Vitalii Sediuk is a Ukrainian comedian who over the past few years has managed to kiss Will Smith, crash Adele's Grammy speech, bury his face in Leonardo DiCaprio's crotch and not even two weeks ago he shoved his head up Ugly Betty's dress. And so… More »

Toni Braxton Thinks God Gave Her Son Autism Because She Had An Abortion? Holy Shit

By: The Superficial / May 22, 2014
Originally, this was supposed to be a post about Phil Robertson preaching more homophobic bullshit on Easter Sunday, but then I found this Toni Braxton item which is way more ridiculous than some Duck Dynasty idiot knowing he has a blank check from the Redneck… More »

Angelina Jolie Just Pissed In Gwyneth Paltrow’s Organic Quinoa Cereal

By: The Superficial / May 22, 2014
Back in March, Gwyneth Paltrow complained about her plight as a working mother because one time she had to go to Wisconsin for a week and you have no idea how that hard that is. Although, in her defense, she did attempt to walk back those comments albeit while simultaneously dubbing… More »

Jessica Chastain: Your New ‘True Detective’ Lady?

By: The Superficial / May 21, 2014
According to Nerdist, Jessica Chastain has been offered the lead role in season two of True Detective, but has yet to accept, so just assume she's making sure her character says awesome shit like, "A man's game costs a man's price," and/or makes bitching beer can figures: Recent rumors have stated… More »

Lindsay Lohan’s Miscarriage Excuse Worked, It Actually Worked

By: The Superficial / May 20, 2014
If Lindsay Lohan were you or I, she would've lied about having a miscarriage in court documents and subsequently found herself guilty of perjury. Instead, she was handed $150,000 and sent packing to Cannes because God is dead. TMZ reports: According to new legal docs,… More »

The 2014 Billboard Music Awards

By: The Superficial / May 19, 2014
Everyone that's anyone (Read: Blake Lively's breasts) is at Cannes right now, but then again, timing isn't exactly this year's Billboard Music Awards' strong suit. So here's some barely interesting people on the red carpet who didn't get their own post by surprisingly not having… More »

Kesha Looks Remarkably Un-Kesha-Like

By: The Superficial / May 19, 2014
Originally, the title of this post was going to be, "STFU, That's Not Kesha," because for the most part, Kesha (The dollar sign's where demons hide and won't let you eat.) looked almost nothing like Kesha. But then as you progress through the gallery, the gold tooth… More »

Jesus Christ Legs, Blake Lively

By: The Superficial / May 16, 2014
Here's Blake Lively continuing to own the shit out of Cannes after being locked in a closet by Ryan Reynolds all these months. Which is why I have to violate this restraining order and rescue her now that she's free. The judge will under- *gets tackled by PreCrime unit*… More »

Zac Efron Might Be Your New Marvel Person

By: The Superficial / May 15, 2014
Last year, Latino Review reported that Zac Efron and Ryan Gosling were up for the roles of Han Solo and/or Luke Skywalker's son(s) which did not happen at all. But this time, they're super serious that Zac Efron has met with Marvel about playing.. something. Unleash The Speculator! We… More »

And Now For The Part Where I Completely Lose My Shit Over Blake Lively

By: The Superficial / May 15, 2014
This woman gives me a fucking boner. I don't know how any of you have managed to live your lives without that knowledge, but let it be a testament to your fortitude and sheer grit. Unless you're Hilary Duff, in which, case I've never seen Blake Lively before in my life. More »

Chris Martin Is Banging Alexa Chung Already

By: The Superficial / May 14, 2014
Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin announced their conscious uncoupling barely two months ago, so that's more than enough time for him to start up showing up at bars with Alexa Chung. Radar reports: An eyewitness noticed the Brits together in a New York City bar on May… More »

Ellen Page Really Knows How To Make Bryan Singer Sound Innocent

By: The Superficial / May 12, 2014
In a new profile for The Hollywood Reporter, Ellen Page opens up about her decision to come out of the closet and reinventing her acting career after spending the past few years battling depression. She also inexplicably - and candidly - answers a question about the Bryan Singer rape accusations instead… More »

Jennifer Lawrence Won The ‘X-Men: Days of Future Past’ Premiere

By: The Superficial / May 12, 2014
While X-Men: First Class was probably the best of the franchise (so far), almost every single line Jennifer Lawrence said was god fucking awful. However, after seeing literally everything else she's been in, it became pretty evident that it was either the script or the director's fault who may or may… More »

Don’t Ask Reese Witherspoon To Pronounce Your Stupid French Last Name

By: The Superficial / May 8, 2014
Sometime during Rihanna's MET Gala after party, a possibly drunk Reese Witherspoon found herself in an elevator with Kate Upton, Zooey Deschanel and an iPhone-wielding Cara Delevingne who was given specific instructions to not make Reese pronounce her "fucking name" because it's "that stupid French."… More »

Willow Smith & Moises Arias Photo Was An ‘Expression of Art,’ You Projecting Pedophiles

By: The Superficial / May 8, 2014
Yesterday, the Internet lost its shit after 20-year-old actor Moises Arias posted a shirtless photo of himself on a bed with 13-year-old Willow Smith to his Instagram then quickly deleted it presumably after hearing the words, "Take a seat right over there," whispered from the shadows. (Although,… More »

Angelina Jolie’s New Boobs Are Set To ‘Promote’

By: The Superficial / May 7, 2014
Here's Angelina Jolie's new boobs at the Paris photo call for Maleficent, a movie I haven't paid much attention to because it looks a helluva lot like Snow White And The Huntsman, but without the chances of Kristen Stewart getting her… More »

Seth Rogen Hates The Shit Out of Justin Bieber

By: The Superficial / May 6, 2014
Now that we've spent almost the entire day looking at beautiful rich people in expensive designer clothes that doesn't even cover their butt cracks, here's Seth Rogen explaining to Howard Stern just how deep and palpable his hatred of Justin Bieber is. Via… More »

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