Red Carpet

Comic-Con Day 2: I’m In Love With A Giant

By: The Superficial / July 26, 2014

Welcome to Day Two of our Comic-Con coverage which I’m telling myself will justify beefing this Friday to go see Guardians of The Galaxy and spending way too long writing a dick-joke laden review of it. Lies are fun. Anyway, let’s get to it. I’ve still got Most Important People to put up when I… More »


Comic-Con Day 1: Hope You Like Chins

By: The Superficial / July 25, 2014

Comic-Con officially started yesterday, and the excitement was palpable provided your idea of excitement is looking at chins because literally two of the biggest stories are chin hair-based. I’m not even joking. So here’s a quick rundown of Day 1, and all the lower portion of the face information that dwells within:… More »


Blake Lively GOOPed Early

By: The Superficial / July 22, 2014

If I had to list Blake Lively‘s accomplishments in order, they’d be the following:… More »


Where’d Selena Gomez’s Implants Go?

By: The Superficial / July 21, 2014

Because people like me will never understand how breasts work (Chlorophyll?), there’s been a lot of talk recently about Selena Gomez getting implants. Except here she is over the weekend looking noticeably less chestier which means she probably didn’t get new boobs. Unless… she forgot to do that thing where she sticks her thumb i… More »


Gwyneth Paltrow Has A Boyfriend? Okay…

By: The Superficial / July 17, 2014

It’s no secret that Gwyneth Paltrow had tons of affairs while surreptitiously monogamous, but that was before she was locked in a battle to see who can be the most courteous separatist and still have sex with other people because it’s important to prove she lives on transcendental plane of conscious that extends far beyond… More »


Selena Gomez Got A New Tattoo

By: The Superficial / July 17, 2014

If there’s one thing that sticks it to your ex while he plows his way through aquatic ass-beasts, it’s a new tattoo, so here’s Selena Gomez showing off hers on Instagram. It apparently translates to “Love Yourself First” which is incredible because that’s literally all I do in the sack. It’s practically my signature move,… More »


Chrissy Teigen Is All You Need To Know About The ESPYs And Other News

By: The Superficial / July 16, 2014

- I already went nerd crazy with Lady Thor, so here’s a whole bunch of Avengers 2 info/pics. [Lainey Gossip]

- Lana Del Rey doesn’t want anyone to listen to her music now. Done. [Dlisted]

– Wait, the butt makes coffee, too? [theCHIVE]

- Rose McGowan knows Michael JacksonMore »


Christian Author Farrah Abraham Wants You To Buy Her Pocket Pussy

By: The Superficial / July 14, 2014

You probably know Farrah Abraham from her upcoming book on Christian parenting, so you shouldn’t be surprised to learn that like most Christ-loving authors, she also has a line of erotic sex toys which she launched over the weekend by licking them right in the rubber vulva. A move she learned from none other tha… More »


It’s Safe To Ask Katherine Heigl If She’s Difficult Now, She Can’t Do Anything

By: The Superficial / July 14, 2014

For those of you don’t remember Katherine Heigl – which is understandable – she was once an aspiring actress who catapulted to fame by starring in Knocked Up and the ABC drama Grey’s Anatomy only to publicly shit on both projects before starring in a series of repetitive romantic comedies with each one tanking harder… More »


Did Shia LaBeouf Know Too Much?

By: The Superficial / July 8, 2014

Now that Shia LaBeouf has been effectively discredited thanks to a month of terrorizing New York with piss and butt-grabbing, it’s time to ask the hard questions about how he’s definitely a victim of MK Ultra. It’s totally obvious. Which brings us to Vigilant Citizen, a blog dedicated to pointing out how every single music… More »


Lindsay Lohan Made It To 28

By: The Superficial / July 2, 2014

This right here. This is what I’m talking about. No one could survive that.

Because God looked down upon the cockroach and said, “Lo, shall you persevere against insurmountable odds and spread blowjays across the earth for all eternity as penance for your bespeckled form which is a blight upon my eyes,” LindsayMore »


What Amy Adams Did Was Classy As Balls No Matter How You Feel About The War(s)

By: The Superficial / June 30, 2014

On Friday, Amy Adams tried to quietly pull a super classy move by giving a soldier her first class seat on a flight from Detroit to Los Angeles. She discreetly arranged it with the flight crew and almost got away with it except ESPN2’s Jemele Hill happened to also be in first class and immediately… More »


Angel Haze On Ireland Baldwin: ‘We F*ck’

By: The Superficial / June 27, 2014

Ever since breaking up with Slater Trout (actual name), Ireland Baldwin has been constantly seen on Instagram with rapper Angel Haze who just confirmed to The Independent that the two fuck which just saved me from writing a post about Shia LaBeouf terrorizing a homeless guy before his arrest. Then again, that story is also… More »


Jenny McCarthy’s Acting Like She Quit ‘The View’

By: The Superficial / June 27, 2014

Earlier in the week, I posted that Jenny McCarthy was getting fired from The View because, well, she’s Jenny McCarthy. And that’s exactly what happened yesterday because apparently everyone but Whoopi Goldberg was let go. Except if you follow Jenny on Twitter, she’d have you believe she quit out of solidarity with Sherri Shepherd who’… More »


Jenny McCarthy’s Getting Fired From ‘The View’

By: The Superficial / June 25, 2014

Earlier this month, a New York federal judge ruled that parents can no longer send their unvaccinated kids to public school claiming a “religious exemption” – Which needs to start happening in more states, Pennsylvania. – and now comes word that Jenny McCarthy‘s getting kicked off The View after a year, so it’s been a… More »


Hope Solo Seems Fun

By: The Superficial / June 24, 2014

For those of you who don’t know, soccer star Hope Solo was arrested over the weekend for domestic violence after she allegedly attacked her sister and 17-year-old nephew while drunk off her ass because she missed a flight. (I wonder how.) Her nephew even pulled a gun on her – albeit a BB gun -… More »


There Was A #FreeTheNipple Fundraiser, Of Course

By: The Superficial / June 20, 2014

A few weeks ago, Scout Willis walked around New York City topless because Instagram doesn’t allow nipples or something. The important thing is that it’s a very serious issue that required very serious celebrity activism instead of, oh I dunno, say childhood obesity, education, hunger, poverty, unemployment, domestic abuse, fracking, gun control, climate change, or… More »


Hot Donna’s Xenu-Boobs And The Rest of The Critics’ Choice Awards

By: The Superficial / June 20, 2014

Here’s Laura Prepon at last night’s Critics’ Choice Awards where her breasts looked the biggest, so she gets her own gallery because we’re serious journalists. From there, you’ll find Tatiana Maslany below because Orphan Black is the shit along with Keri Russell who’s a goddamn machine on The Americans (Fuck Fargo.) followed by Emmy RossumMore »


Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin Are Probably Back Together Already

By: The Superficial / June 19, 2014

While your pedestrian separation was a pauper’s poorbox that ended with your husband realizing he’d rather live in a one bedroom efficiency that smells of various beefs and jerkies than spend another minute with you, Gwyneth Paltrow‘s conscious uncoupling has poured rose-hued, spiritually rejuvenating tea into the Croatian hand cups of her marriage, according to… More »


Heidi Klum & Seal Might Get Back Together

By: The Superficial / June 19, 2014

“Oh, how I’ve missed your space boob…”
“Mind-bone me, Norrin Seal!”

According to In Touch Weekly, Heidi Klum and Seal might be getting back together after spending two years banging other people. So I’m just going to assume that was a simple matter of her agreeing to stay out of his cameraMore »


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