Crap We Missed - Page 16

Real Clowns Are Pissed At Stephen King… I Wonder Why

Hearing a bunch of clowns complaining that Stephen King’s It is causing them to lose business makes me want to honk a bycicle horn and drive off a cliff in a tiny car. More »

Victoria Secret’s Fallen Angels Bring 1,000 Years of Darkness Upon NYC

The Dark Lord Hadid has summoned her minions to assemble and fulfill the prophecy!! More »

Bring Your Nipples To Work Day: Bella Hadid

Since she doesn’t have a kid and I doubt anybody would trust her with a dog, Bella just has to make the best of it. More »

Let’s Check In With Justin Bieber’s Balls Real Quick

A lawsuit between a hospital and a former staffer has raised new questions about the status of Justin Bieber’s testicles… This is the kind of hard-hitting journalism that illuminates the whole North Korea thing for the puff piece it is. More »

Joel Osteen is Probably Matthew McConaughey’s Evil Twin Brother

He doesn’t need these soggy Houston flood victims tracking mud all over God’s carpet until Jesus gives him the go ahead. More »

Rachel McCord Hitchhiking Sorta Naked And Other News

You know, if I were to stand on the side of a busy street wearing this and waving my finger around I’d probably wind up at a very different party than the one she’s probably going to… More »

Taylor Swift Is Taking Her Album To Browntown

Nothing is more rock n’ roll than an endorsement from the United Parcel Service. More »

Just Kidding Heidi Klum Actually Won All The VMA’s

Heidi Klum’s breast lumps won all the awards last night, sorry Kendrick… More »

The VMA’s Were Last Night And Things Happened

Katy Perry hosted so let’s just say the things that happened weren’t necessarily outstanding… More »

I Think Kourtney Kardashian Just Realized She’s Dating A Child

These pictures of Younes Bendjima bolting out of a car because he smells french fries make me very happy. More »

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