1. Man, I gotta start writing ballads. I actually got one started:

    Baby, baby, baby,
    I make you wet,
    as we watch Lifetime on the couch,
    with your pet.

    Then I light candles in the bathroom,
    scented of spices and lavender,
    And I lick off all your clothes,
    So you——FUCK!!!! What rhymes with lavender!?

    Damn, this shit’s harder than I thought.

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