Credit where credit’s due, she doesn’t seem to have suffered any of the usual psych med side effects, like weight gain and bloating, and…oh, Christ, she’s not on any medication, is she?
Oh well. If you want to pee in a butt, sometimes you have to let the young lady cover your windows with aluminum foil and destroy all of your smoke detectors. That’s how most of my dates go, anyway.
I still would. Just for nostalgia’s sake. She still looks pretty good.
Yes, but since she’s no longer crazy, she wouldn’t. And even in her crazy days she wasn’t *that* crazy.
You sure about that? No woman can resist Don Zaloog, especially when I refer to myself in the 3rd person. I’ve got it all. You won’t find a manlier man than Don Zaloog.
*hides my collection of Yu-Gi-Oh cards, my Wii U and 3DS and vast array of pornographic DVDs*
You call out your own name during sex, don’t you?
Well, that makes sense, since you’re by yourself when it happens.
Can you blame me? When you’re as sexy as I am, you don’t need a partner.
You could help me rectify that situation. What are you doing later?
I’m handing out groceries to the needy. Line forms on the left.
Oh, I don’t need any groceries. Why don’t you swing by my place later? Say 8ish. You know that red and black lace number that I like? I’ll be wearing that when you get here.
You mean your Tickle Me Elmo t-shirt? It needs washing.
I like it dirty, girl.
Veronika and Don, i thank you both for the laugh. Good comedy.
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Amanda Bynes vacations in Cabo San Lucas with her parents. (April 6, 2014)