Penelope Cruz meets Suri


Penelope Cruz is the latest human being to come out and confirm they’ve met Suri Cruise.

“I met Suri. She is really beautiful. She is really special,” the 32-year-old actress told reporters Thursday at the London premiere of her new film, Volver. “One of the most beautiful babies I have ever seen. And I am extremely happy for them. They are really happy and doing great.”

I’m pretty sure Tom Cruise is just inviting people over to his house and then forcing them to pretend they saw his child. “You’ll do it because I know where you live. You tell everybody she’s the most beautiful baby you’ve ever seen or else I’ll destroy you. I’m Tom Cruise, bitch!” And then he dresses up Katie Holmes as a lumberjack and has sex with “her.”