Penelope Cruz in a bikini

January 14th, 2010 // 125 Comments

Before jetting off to Rome for the premiere of Nine yesterday, Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem hit the beach in Brazil where they attempted to set a new world’s record in grab-assing. They’ll of course have to compete with the time I convinced Kim Kardashian I was the President of Reality TV and basically every single morning when Tom Cruise cages an extra in a meat locker until he Greco-Roman wrestles his way out. (R.I.P. Man Buying Newspaper in Jerry Maguire. I swear you’ll be avenged. — Eventually.)

Photos: Fame
Who is your recent celebrity crush..? - Yahoo! Answers
Penelope Cruz - Penélope Cruz Wallpaper (4919126) - Fanpop
Penélope Cruz
Penelope Cruz: Information from Answers.com
Penélope Cruz to Make Oscar® Show Appearance
Beverly Hills, CA – Academy Award® winner Penélope Cruz will present at the 84th Academy Awards® ceremony, telecast producers Brian Grazer and Don Mischer announced today. Cruz won an Oscar in 2008 for her supporting role in "Vicky Cristina Barcelona.

Comments (125)

  1. machachacha | January 14, 2010 at 12:39 pm

    first

    Reply
  2. vato | January 14, 2010 at 12:40 pm

    Odelay

    Reply
  3. hollywood gossip | January 14, 2010 at 12:40 pm

    she has a great body.

    Reply
  4. kingofbeer | January 14, 2010 at 12:44 pm

    NICE!!!! FAPFAPFAPFAP

    Reply
  5. jlylec | January 14, 2010 at 12:48 pm

    fat. gross.

    Reply
  6. Richard McBeef | January 14, 2010 at 12:49 pm

    Hot body.

    Face of a baby bird.

    Reply
  7. QueLastima | January 14, 2010 at 12:50 pm

    Of course neither is anywhere near overweight, but like most Spaniards both clearly don’t exercise and probably smoke.

    Reply
  8. Solo | January 14, 2010 at 12:53 pm

    I would give almost anything to release on that belly.

    Reply
  9. Solo | January 14, 2010 at 12:53 pm

    I would give almost anything to release on that belly.

    Reply
  10. T-Bonz | January 14, 2010 at 12:55 pm

    wait….did you really just call her fat? um. that’s a joke right?

    And Javi transcends body type, if you mean him, he is that hot.

    Reply
  11. Valerie | January 14, 2010 at 12:56 pm

    Well. She’s an apple not a pear.

    Reply
  12. Taz | January 14, 2010 at 12:57 pm

    That is one hot woman

    Reply
  13. Parker | January 14, 2010 at 12:57 pm

    It’s funny but the minute I saw photo 8 the first thing I thought of was the time I imagined slipping my sausage into Penelope’s tight ass. Ah, memories.

    Reply
  14. superficial--dish best serve Rough | January 14, 2010 at 1:05 pm

    Thank god she was reared in other culture similar to that Bahlz chic, I would not worry about that X-tra 5 pounds, as a matter of fact it enhances her (Boobs)figure…Havier looks hideous, im sure hes a great guy…im just jealous!

    Reply
  15. Heywood Jablomi | January 14, 2010 at 1:08 pm

    #5 why don’t you upload a couple of your pictures, I’d love to see what perfection looks like.

    Reply
  16. McBiff | January 14, 2010 at 1:13 pm

    I knew it would only be a couple of posts before some faggot would start calling her fat.

    Reply
  17. Viv | January 14, 2010 at 1:13 pm

    A female ass that’s smaller than the male hand that grabs it is not grabworthy at all…what is he grabbing? bone?

    A good ass should be round and plentyful, so that it can be grabbed and taken the way it’s meant to, including and all those nasty things you guys always talk about in this site.

    Reply
  18. dude | January 14, 2010 at 1:13 pm

    Agree with Richard McBeef! Nicely put sir.

    Great ass, but she’s still a fucking chihuahua. And her voice induces impotence in healthy males.

    Reply
  19. jlylec | January 14, 2010 at 1:16 pm
  20. a2425536 | January 14, 2010 at 1:19 pm

    #19, you are an idiot.

    Reply
  21. Pseudopodia | January 14, 2010 at 1:21 pm

    Will be a heffer once she’s close to 40 and metabolism slows down.
    Look at that bone structure around the pelvis.
    She’s doomed.
    Rotund.

    Reply
  22. You must be the real jlylec | January 14, 2010 at 1:26 pm

    #20, you’re a #19

    Reply
  23. Anon | January 14, 2010 at 1:47 pm

    BUTTERFACE!!!!

    Reply
  24. nastyjay | January 14, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    i love when boobs are visible from underneath

    Reply
  25. Kangaroo | January 14, 2010 at 1:49 pm

    She’s not ‘fat’ but she is kinda thick around the middle. Not a big deal. Her real downfall is the beak. I know you Jewish guys love it (the body says ‘spicy exotic tempttress’, but the nose feels like home) but it just looks bad to me.

    Reply
  26. Les | January 14, 2010 at 2:01 pm

    Most Americans are fat and she got back in shape after having a baby. Of course she probably uppgraded her implants when having the tummy tuck. But still sexy.

    Reply
  27. kerri | January 14, 2010 at 2:04 pm

    if you people think she is fat or even slightly less than perfect i have officially given up on the human race. i fear for the future, you idiots.

    Reply
  28. Sam | January 14, 2010 at 2:06 pm

    Javier: “Don’t put that asscheek in your bikini bottom, ma’am. Don’t put it in your bikini bottom. It’s your lucky asscheek.”
    Penelope: “Where do you want me to put it?”
    Javier: “Anywhere not in your bikini bottom. Where it’ll get mixed in with the other asscheek and become just a butt. Which it is.”

    Reply
  29. God of Thunder | January 14, 2010 at 2:07 pm

    OK body, fugly face. BTW whats she doing with “Easter Island Head?” Pic #6

    Reply
  30. God of Thunder | January 14, 2010 at 2:14 pm

    #25. Kangaroo. I’m not Jewish but would like to know what the hell would a Jewish person have to do with anything?

    Reply
  31. ANita | January 14, 2010 at 2:26 pm

    if any of you “only self-loving” commentators think that Penelope is fat then you should all get help asap…before it’s too late. morons

    Reply
  32. maudina | January 14, 2010 at 2:28 pm

    Awesome body (penelope), i couldn’t help grabbing her ass all the time if i was by her side, just like Javier.

    Reply
  33. Vinnie the Chin | January 14, 2010 at 2:38 pm

    Javier knows what he (and everyone else) likes!

    Reply
  34. Hefe | January 14, 2010 at 3:05 pm

    I love how those massive mammaries don’t come anywhere close to fitting in that bikini top.

    Reply
  35. LikeItThatWay | January 14, 2010 at 3:13 pm

    She is gorgeous head to toe — beautiful face, eyes, hair, and body. All you haters can now return to whacking off to photoshopped pics of skinny-assed, faked-boobed bitches.

    Reply
  36. pimp | January 14, 2010 at 3:16 pm

    now that’s some sweet pussy…too bad there’s a fucking ogre all over it…

    Reply
  37. Rod | January 14, 2010 at 3:32 pm

    #13 - spit chocolate milk all over my screen. well played, sir.

    Reply
  38. weirdo | January 14, 2010 at 3:42 pm

    I’d love to bury certain body parts deep into her sweet warm asshole!

    Reply
  39. assman | January 14, 2010 at 3:53 pm

    ASSTASSTIC!!!!

    Reply
  40. jlylec | January 14, 2010 at 4:21 pm

    heywood and mcbiff…go blow each other and die.

    Reply
  41. Ass Xxx | January 14, 2010 at 5:14 pm

    nice ass!

    Reply
  42. teebol | January 14, 2010 at 5:18 pm

    she’s my dream. Lucky man.

    Reply
  43. Carolyn | January 14, 2010 at 5:19 pm

    #26 As far as I know she’s never had a baby. I have seen her smoke, don’t know about him in real life but he’s smoked in movies.

    Reply
  44. SO RIGHT | January 14, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    Are you kidding me? This is a beautiful natural body! She is gorgeous from top to bottom. Her butt is darling!

    Reply
  45. ___ | January 14, 2010 at 5:57 pm

    That’s a perfect ass. Not too big, not too small. Just right.

    Reply
  46. nat | January 14, 2010 at 6:05 pm

    She’s absolutely gorgeous. Simple.

    Reply
  47. Stupid | January 14, 2010 at 7:06 pm

    # 19 that is one ugly pic, yuck.

    Reply
  48. sushi | January 14, 2010 at 7:31 pm

    she is UGLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Her body is average.
    Average body… ugly face

    not as bad as Sarah Jessica Parker though.

    Reply
  49. Smarm | January 14, 2010 at 7:46 pm

    “17. Viv – January 14, 2010 1:13 PM

    A female ass that’s smaller than the male hand that grabs it is not grabworthy at all…what is he grabbing? bone?

    A good ass should be round and plentyful, so that it can be grabbed and taken the way it’s meant to, including and all those nasty things you guys always talk about in this site.

    I know that’s probably what the plethora of random scumbags tell you so that they can fuck your nasty, fat, ass, the bigger the better and all that shit, but the reality is, this chick is fucking stunning and you will never, ever, look this good- you dont like whats posted on this site, get the fuck out, cow. Bone? You’re fucking retarded. You have no fucking clue what a good ass ‘should’ look like. Understandable, given the fact yours is the size of the average third world country.

    And jlylec, in case you havent figured it out yet from all of the posts shooting your stupid ass ‘shes fat’ comments down, you’re wrong. And a moron. Fat? Seriously. Some people I think just post shit to go against the grain and try and sound fucking cool.

    Let me guess- Lindsay Lohan is ‘thick’, huh?

    Reply
  50. tkdchick008 | January 14, 2010 at 7:51 pm

    smarm- youre an idiot…you just argued a quote that supports your own post that cruz is hot…which she is

    Reply

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