Paula Deen’s Getting Fired From Everything

June 24th, 2013 // 102 Comments
Paula Deen
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When we last left Paula Deen before bailing for the weekend, her company released a statement literally reminding everyone that Paula Deen is very old and from the South, so it’s really not her fault she’s a tad racisty. She also bailed on Matt Lauer and then began a very public tailspin in which she released a bizarre series of apology videos (after the jump) that started out as so blatantly scripted by a publicist you can literally see the edits when Paula flubbed the lines she was supposed to memorize to an off-the-cuff, unscripted Paula who wants you to bring her your darkies, your Jews and even your gays for she shall love them like no one has ever loved them before in her warm, buttery embrace. And just to demonstrate how well these went over, The Food Network not only fired Paula Deen but specifically cited the videos as the reason for it. TMZ reports:

According to our sources, her management’s clumsy damage control — backing out of the Matt Lauer interview and releasing multiple lame mea culpas — was the primary reason the Food Network pulled the plug on the celebrity chef.
We’re told the apology videos were the last straw — clinching the Food Network’s decision to drop the ax on her.

On top of that, QVC is slowly backing away from her, and Random House is contemplating pulling her upcoming cook book. Naturally, this has caused anger and confusion amongst Paula’s fans and Internet racists who think white people should be allowed to call black people niggers without fear of reprisal. So for those people, I’ve compiled a handy guide to help you navigate these deep-fried times:

How’s come they gotta fire poor ol’ Paula Deen just for saying “nigger” when y’all know she can’t help being from the South?

Well, for starters, this situation isn’t really about Paula Deen admitting to saying “nigger” in a court deposition. It’s about her unwittingly revealing her restaurant’s practice of discriminating against black employees. From paying them less, making them use a separate restroom, calling them “my little monkey,” letting her co-owner brother tell them they “have no civil rights here” and openly wishing she could decorate his wedding with “tap dancing niggers.” All of which I understand harkens back to a simpler, more regal time before the North made you stop owning people like property, but it did and you’ve had plenty time to get over it, so suck it up, Jethro.

Whatever happened to f’eedom a speech?!

Did Paula Deen go to jail for saying the word “nigger?” Welcome to the end of this transaction. Also, take note, that she isn’t being punished by the government, but instead the free market through precious job creators whose penises we must suckle tenderly and often lest America fall into the hands of Satan.

Black people call each other “nigger” all the time, why can’t white folk call ‘em that?

Get spayed or neutered. Today.

Paula Deen’s just bein’ truthful and showin’ character. Shouldn’t we applaud her for not being you one of PC liberal phonies?

Here are three videos of Paula Deen tossing her “principles” out the window so fast, that I will genuinely be amazed if there’s not a fourth of her shitting on the Confederate flag while swearing allegiance to The Lord of Light. “For the night is dark and full of terrors, sugar.” *lights stick of butter on fire*

Paula Deen Apology Video 1:

This was one was pulled from YouTube in less than an hour. I can’t imagine why.

Paula Deen Apology Video 2:

Paula Deen Apology Video 3:

Photo: FameFlynet

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  1. The problem, of course, is that to understand the real reasons the Queen of Budda (y’all) got canned (tubbed?) would require actual thought and processing of information. It’s much easier for the dipshits to simply say she got fired for uttering a bad word 30 years ago. Which would be ridiculous.

    • rme

      I agree with you. Since she was raised in the South, and I’m sure had many black friends/employees, therefore the conversations would be as relaxed as anyone would be with any friend. Be it under duress or friendly talk, what difference does it make. What happened to freedom of speech people? Blacks call themselves the N word like crazy! Italians were called ‘ginnies’ Puerto Ricans were called ‘spicks’ . why does anyone have to treat blacks any different?

      • First of all that N word doesn’t have any relation to black people God made us all the same, who are you to say what I am I have a name and it’s not the N word, go and educate yourself and learn the real meaning of the N word, and Paula Deen is a raciest she has been getting by for a long time by treating people badly because they are not anglo’s like her and she’s crying because she see’s that every anglo person is not raciest. I thought age came with wisdom but not everyone she needs Jesus and get a life!!!!!!!!

      • Freedom of speech only protects you from being censored by the government.

        What you’re witnessing is other Americans’ freedom of speech in reaction to Paula Deen’s fully exercised and intact freedom of speech. It’s a very simple concept, but I have some puppets in the back if that will help.

  2. Ming the Malevolent

    Yeezus, it was an entire generation ago people! Overreact much?

  3. Kanye W.

    George Bush hates black people

  4. Dick Hell

    Amanda Bynes shot Paula’s apology videos on her iPhone but somehow the production values still came out looking like shit.

  5. Average Guy

    Paula Dean and James Deen should make a private video to launch her next career.

  6. Robb7

    Poetic justice when the Food Network rams a stick of butter up her fat ass!!

    • kris

      why dont you get informed. Do you have any idea how many blacks are on air at FN…That and only that is why they fired her. They were scarred to death they would look like they were racist if they kept her because the dont hire blacks……Theyve got you right were they want you!!!! pitiful

      • No, what’s pitiful is that your badly reasoned and painfully illiterate little missive is a reminder that morons like you not only reproduce, you vote. I can only pray that something shiny will continually distract you from doing both.

  7. FromTexas

    I wish people would stop saying “But she’s from the South.” I’m really weary of this idea that every person who doesn’t live in New York or LA is a racist idiot named Jethro. There are dumbasses everywhere, people. Don’t put this crap on us, her attitude and general worthlessness are not due to where she’s from but rather due to who and what she IS.

    • Average Guy

      C’mon. Anyone who has spent time in the South knows racism runs strong and deep there. Not everyone in the South is racist, of course, but it’s a higher ratio then the general population.

      The South has:
      1. More racists
      2. More Bible thumpers
      3. More Illiteracy
      4. Fewer college educated people.

      • Deacon Jones

        Try coming to Philadelphia….

        Im heading down to North Carolina on Wednesday, in the heart of hickville at a beach town on the outskirts of Wilmington, NC, so that should be interesting.
        I heard its like Myrtle Beach aka The Redneck Riviera

      • It’s a tourist town Deacon. You’ll be fine. There’s a beach, lots of golf, and crappy strip mall stuff. We’re not so bad down here in NC.

      • Deacon Jones

        Yeah, I love the OBX, but the beaches around Wilmington dont look anything like them. Ill be drunk for 5 days, so fuck it.

      • Average Guy, you wish – that’s a really comforting illusion that because racism might be more overt in the South, that’s the only place it exists. It’s alive and well in New York and New England, and it’s sure as shit present in California, where I heard my district manager, who was of my generation, refer to a client by the n-word, and then try to laugh it off when I called him on it. You ought to check out some of the comments on Deen’s FB page, because her supporters, justifiers and apologists are NOT all from the South.

      • It’s like people forget Ohio even exists when mentioning backwards rednecks. I had a man hand me a business card recruiting for the KKK when I lived in Ohio. Just stopped for gas and the guy wanders up and says he has an opportunity for me. Or that the Neo-Nazi party romps around loudly and litigiously in Illinois. Nope, those mess up the narrative.

      • Not sure how active they are there now, but Indiana used to be the real KKK stronghold (even to running candidates for President), and it was plenty active in Michigan (and not just in the Motor City, either) as well as Colorado and Oregon. Most people have no idea, and assume burning crosses and wearing sheets stop at the Mason Dixon line.

        I grew up in Massachusetts, about 25 miles outside of Worcester where the Klan was wicked popular before WWII. It died out there, but not because people decried its racist stance against blacks – it’s because the Klan also hates The Church and MA’s political machine at the time was predominantly Irish Catholic.

      • CD

        Actually, as someone who has lived in the south a long time, I here more racism from everyone when I travel north of the mason dixon line. Just like the NY, where the F bomb is part of everyday communication.

      • You say that New Yorkers use the F-bomb as part of everyday communication as if that’s a bad thing.

      • hank

        What does the F bomb have to do with racism?

    • When she was raised back in the 60′s, “nigger” was a very common word in the south and youngsters were brought up thinking it was the correct term for people with black skin. So in a way that is a valid argument. Frankly, though, losing her career over an utterance she made 30 years ago, seems to me to be way too severe of a punishment. Sounds like they wanted to be rid of her anyway and this serendipitously fell into place.

  8. anonym

    It’s clear Obama is staying far away from this.

  9. anonym

    N__ger came about because southerners couldn’t pronounce Negro.

    • Nonnie Moose

      Actually, it started from Dutch usage (neger) in New York colony in the 1600s. It didn’t become a pejorative until the 1900s. Nice try, though.

      • Dr. Porkenheimer

        Actually you’re both wrong.
        It’s a bastardization for “nigra”, which is Latin for black.

      • Nonnie Moose

        Ummm, no, actually, I’m not. Latin wasn’t exactly widely spoken in the New World. While lots of people could read/write it, it wasn’t a spoken language. Spanish, Portuguese, French, yes. And of course Dutch in New Amsterdam which became New York. And in North America the word that became “nigger” first started from the common Dutch use of “neger”.

      • What’s he trying to say is that he can’t read a wiki entry and that variants of “negro”, meaning “black” in several Latin-based languages, migrated to English to describe blacks, more specifically African slaves. Since slaves in the southern colonies weren’t traded in the US, but bought in the West Indies well until the mid-1700′s, you can see how that term migrates to the US. FYI, the Dutch variant of “neger” that specifically refers to blacks/slaves also probably came that route as well, since “zwart”, rather than “neger”, was actually the common term for “black” in the 17th century when referring to the color.

      • Also, the term become a pejorative long before the 1900′s – don’t depend so heavily on wiki for the “truth”. The fact that it was applied without discrimination to blacks, Indians, Mexicans, French-Canadians means that it was meant to apply to anyone not a lily-white Anglo Saxon; i.e. it was a discriminatory term.

    • So they could pronounce “secession” but not “negro”? Try pronouncing “moron” while looking at yourself in the mirror.

      • Have you ever heard a Southerner pronounce “secession”? Most of them pronounce it “succession.”

      • negative zero

        “Most of them pronounce it “succession.””

        Talk out of your ass much, Jezzer? Not that the topic even comes up very often, but I have never, even once, heard anyone say that, and I’ve lived down here since ’83.

      • Silly, don’t you realize that all Suthruners talk like they have a mouth full of corn pone, sorghum and missing teeth, and can’t pronounce big words like “secession” for squat?

  10. Fatty McButter is the type of person who claims she’s not racist because she doesn’t swerve to intentionally run over black people so it’s okay to hit them when they are directly in front of you.
    She’s fat enough for the Superficial to gush over her bikini pics, tho.

  11. kris

    This author…and i use that word loosely is a fool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dubya got millions of people killed and mutilated and he didnt get fired!!!!

  12. Ronald Reagan

    I liked it better when the minorities were whining.

  13. Sweet Jesus, Apology video 1 was a ye olde good laugh! So when A redneck feels shame(loss of $) your face becomes pink as your hideous pink clothes? Love the stuttering in a southern accent about blacks, religion and gays.

  14. adm.fookbar

    All shit aside, thank you for not writing “n-word” out repeatedly. Its assinine. Even this “news” site is allowed to report on what stupid people say.

    Also, blacks DO call each other that all the time. Maybe they should take a hint from whites that its every bit as ignorant regardless of for lineage?

    Anyways. Carry on.

    • I find it interesting that White Folks who say they Hate The Word so much,don’t seem to put up much of a fight when they hear Black Folks using it. If you truly believe that the word shouldn’t be used,then maybe not automatically assuming that All Blacks are comfortable with other Blacks using it would help. I often find that a lot of Whites who make the “Double Standard” argument are not upset that Blacks use it,but more upset that they can’t! If more Whites would show anger against ANYONE using the word,than maybe it wouldn’t be so common. By using the”it’s okay if Blacks say it” argument,it just makes it worse.

  15. Not Pictured : Sanity

  16. Oxford

    My parents would have beat the crap out of me if I ever said that word. I’m not from the South, nor have I ever been there, but are they all so stupid there?

  17. JPC

    The part I love is her defenders screaming “But she’s an old Southern lady! She grew up with racism, so she doesn’t know how offensive it is!”

    Bitch was born in 1947. She grew up in the Civil Rights era. She knows exactly how offensive “n****er” is.

  18. Cher X

    Yeah if you go on yahoo articles – the racist ignorant comments are all like “rap people say it!”. Cause I’m sure that they speak for an entire race of people, right? Idiots. I’ve been writing back – think of it as the word “bitch”. You may think it’s funny to call your friend that but if someone says it out of anger or hate, it takes on a WHOLE different meaning.

    • I can (and often do) call my sister a shrill bitch as a joke between us. If someone outside of our private joke circle does that, then I’ll need to be tazed. It really isn’t hard to figure out.

  19. This site is a POS now… Just received a notice that comments are now being approved by Admin before posting for public view, even AFTER “signing in to comment” like an obedient little lemming. This is the first time this has happened (at least to me)…and it seems to be in response to me trying to post the links to the actual deposition and the complaint on this matter. If this is how it’s going to be from now on, f*ck this sh*t.

  20. figmo

    I hope she is held up as a shining example of what happens when you bend over allow political correctness to take you from behind! She came crawling back, hat in hand, begging for forgiveness and she is still crucified.

    If I was famous and somebody dug up some dirt from my past (of which there is plenty) – I’d just own it. My apology video would be “that was then – this is now – deal with it or suck me”

    Yeah – I’d be out of a job for sure. But at least I’d have my dignity.

    This poor women groveled and is still spit on by public opinion. All you casters of the first stone should be ashamed of yourselves. As if *YOUR* life is so f-in perfect….

    • JPC

      Well, my life isn’t perfect, but I’m pretty sure I’ve never talked about wanting to “dress up some tap-dancing n****ers like slaves” for my party. I also haven’t blatantly discriminated against black workers either. I guess you can’t say the same?

      Something tells me your “that was then – this is now” wouldn’t be true, cause you certainly sound like you are exactly the same as you were back then.

    • Google “Talks at the New York Times” Fall 2012, Paula Deen;

      You can hear hear discuss her condescending viewpoint towards racism, her rationalization of slavery, and her insulting, then humiliating her “black friend” from the audience.

      That was October of last year.

    • Nice attempt at spin by trying to claim this took place in her “past” – like she was some sort of reckless juvenile n-word user who just now got outed because some nasty old media crusader dug up dirt on her misspent youth. This “poor woman” and her brother are being sued for discriminatory and harassing workplace conditions that happened within the past few years – and the lawsuit was brought by one of her white employees, so you can get off that PC-victimzation high hobbyhorse you’re riding any time now.

      As for the unending repentance parade of videos – fucking spare me your hand-wringing as to how she’s being treated so badly when all she wants to do is apologize. Being truly sorry for something you did, and being sorry you got caught doing it, are two very different things. The only thing she’s sorry about here is that her showcases are dumping her and that it’s gonna impact on her financially, and you can see exactly how much she values her “dignity” (by which I assume you mean standing up for her racist views) when it comes to losing her bottom line. Get a fucking clue: she’s upset that people are offended enough to dump her, but she’s not sorry she has a deplorable racist mindset – and there is a distinction.

      The fact that she stated in the same breath that she knew the public wouldn’t approve of her dream slave-theme wedding means that she actually DID know that her viewpoint wasn’t acceptable, but looking at why that is, and questioning the belief that black people aren’t put on earth to be inferior to her obviously never happened, since she didn’t give enough of a shit to do anything about the discriminatory practices that were going on in her restaurant.

    • No you wouldn’t.

      Also, this is probably why you’re not famous.

  21. Smithfield Foods has also severed ties with Ms. Deen.

    Smithfield Foods is positioning itself for a $4.7 Billion buyout by China’s Shuanghui International.

    Having a product spokes-person who has caused herself a race problem is probably not in the best interest of the head of Marketing keeping his job when his new boss is not going to be white.

    • joe cano

      Like the Chinese have any fucks to give about America’s internecine little racial dramas. Thats just #firstworldproblems

      • If you have get to be involved in International Business dealings, you’ll get to realize that there is an underlying mistrust by people of color (all colors) of white people in business dealings. After all between the British and the US we’ve been treating people of color like they are stupid children (at best) for centuries.

  22. I bet she used to attend all the black lynchings, with a basket of fried chicken for the folks that put the ropes around the blacks neck, in the south. Just looking at the oppressive b**** makes my skin crawl.

    • She’s a democrat and she supported Obama in 08. She even had Michelle on her show. She’s just being a true southern democrat, they did start the KKK after all.

      http://www.breitbart.com/InstaBlog/2013/06/21/Paula-Deen-Democrat-Campaigned-For-Obama

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MLRxzu9lfI

      • *sigh* Do your fucking homework before you embarrass yourself further. The “southern democrats” that you think started the KKK are not the southern democratic party today, primarily because they haven’t been yellow dog democrats (look it up, I’m not fucking spoon feeding you everything) for well over half a century. When Harry Truman created the President’s Committee on Civil Rights and abolished segregation in the military in 1948, a shit-ton of segregation-loving whites fled the Democratic party to start the short-lived Dixiecrats, making the so-called “solid South” not-so monolithically solid.

        Ever heard of Goldwater’s “Operation Dixie” that evolved into the “southern strategy” under Nixon, to woo disgruntled whites into finding a home in the Republican party in the early 60′s? They emphasized the fact that blacks were voting Democratic (when they could vote, that is) and that voting Republican would mean they could undermine their interests, weakening the Voting Rights Act and other Civil Rights measures that the more progressive Democrats were behind. In other words, the Republican party will be sure to represent your white (read: segregationist, State’s Rights) interests, while the Democrats will not. This is where the “party of Lincoln” shifts away from its formerly Northern, abolitionist image to embrace the openly racist strategy of segregationist politics.

        Also, you might want to actually read the article you cited. You apparently think Deen’s party affiliation actually proves something, but unfortunately you linked to an article in which the author states right off the bat that Deen’s party affiliation is a pretty trivial and insignificant factoid.

        FYI, what Deen does, and who she interacts with, when the cameras are rolling and what she does in her own restaurant when she thinks people who don’t matter can hear her are two very different things.

  23. Hitler’s granddaughter.

  24. Tm C

    She tried to apologize but no one is having it. She can and will move on with her life, no one died and the sun will come up tomorrow so we can all move on.

    • No, she will continue to beat it to death in the hopes that she can convince the networks that dumped her that this was just a small lapse and that she will take the “opportunity” to “grow” from it – in the same way that OJ was equally determined to convince everyone he wasn’t a double murderer. The people who want to “move on” appear to be those who are uncomfortable with the thought that racism isn’t limited to ignorant incestuous Southern ass-scratchers, and can’t sweep that idea under the rug fast enough.

      Quite frankly, who would want someone on the payroll who’s so fucking obtuse that in 2013, after literally living though the Civil Rights movement in their youth, they think that any variation of “I didn’t know any better” is a valid and acceptable excuse?

  25. Grand Dragon

    She hates black people, she can’t be all bad

  26. Marie

    How an uneducated, unhealthy cook was ever listened to just blows my mind, so it seems like poetic justice to me. Way to go Food Network, Smithfield, & QCC. I hope others will step up to the plate. In the days of a Black President, there is no room for bigots parading to be unbiased!

  27. mora

    Thank glory we have a white run blog to define racism on behalf of black people, being black people are just not capable of speaking for themselves. white people must teach other white people abou racism. HILARIOUS. Bitch should have hired a guest blogger of COLOR to talk about it, but I guess she does not know any. No. thats not racist at all, is it you fucking cunt?

    • I think you meant to post your comment on Yahoo.

    • Youve nailed it. Episodes like this are really just opportunities for one group of whites to lord over and feel superior to another group of whites. Blacks couldnt give a shit about Paula Dean.

      • Were you deliberately dropped on your head as a child, or was it an accident?

      • Do you honestly believe that any black person was damaged by or even cares about Paula Deen’s comment? This is all part of a weird little game that white people like to play and minorities are no more than props to be used.

      • That’s like asking me if I honestly believe that any black person was ever damaged by being made to sit in the back of the bus, because that’s just a weird little game that white people like to play. Since it’s obvious you don’t bother to read anything – even Fish’s post, above – it’s clear you have no idea that her admission was gained in deposition from a lawsuit that charges her with gross discrimination against her black employees. Using the n-word isn’t something that occurs in a vacuum, it’s part and parcel of how she sees black people. And it takes a special brand of fuckwit to actually declare that a black employee who objected to being called “my little monkey” and threatened to go to the EEOC about it couldn’t possibly care about being addressed that way, nor were any of her other black employees damaged by being disparaged and not being treated the same as the white employees.

        Congratulations! Because you, my friend, are that fuckwit. Now you can tell us how women really aren’t ever damaged by being sexually harassed or coerced at work, because it’s just a weird little game that men play (probably because they really, really like them), or that gay people honestly don’t care about not being able to marry or adopt, because it’s just a weird little game that straight people like to play, and they’re just props to be used when they call them “f*****t” and claim they shouldn’t be allowed to teach in elementary school?

        BTW, spare us the rebuttal in which you try to save face by claiming that the only reason any black employee would make a fuss over Deen’s words and her overall attitude is because they think they’ll get a big settlement in the lawsuit. It’s about as credible as your statement that no one who’s black has ever been damaged by a racial slur, and that they don’t care what white people say about them, anyway. If you can’t see that sort of moronic, idiotic rationalization is the most lazy-ass, flea-bitten ignorant excuse for letting racists and bigots – of any color – have a pass for their abusive, toxic, corrosive shit, then I’m going to have to say that mom clearly dropped you more than once – hard – and it definitely wasn’t accidental.

  28. Jenn

    Eh. Now Paula needs to go and take kids with her. The Jackson woman needs to go as well.

  29. Who really gives a shit….nigger, coon, jungle bunny, spear-chucker, nig-nog. There’s dozens more but you get the point. There’s supposedly offensive words to describe everybody…wop, dago, limey, slant, zip, fish-head, jewboy mick, wetback. C’mon folks… its here and its here to stay so let’s just get on with life and not worry about this kind of crap….unless you want to see the ‘thought police’ become a reality!!!!!

  30. After all this time that Paula has HAD her various enterprises on the market, she should have NO PROBLEM getting by & living quite nicely (sadly) despite being shunned by her previous business associates. She can quietly fade into non-celebrity status & focus on having “plantation era themed” events for her family & whomever still remain in her circle (dwindling) of friends. Economically she most likely will not suffer.

  31. jean

    Thats enough now, over one word, who of you have never said it, please.

  32. chris

    amazing! the vitriol being pumped out – perhaps to help wash everyones sins away? Dean is from a different time…ok, but please stop being so “offended” – after all most of you probably never watched her shows or even knew her name before this tawdry mess made it on the news.

    Cultures are almost naturally xenophobic – we try to pretend that it is not so, but behind closed doors and in private we all stereotype and generalize to some degree.

    If you don’t care for Ms. Dean – don’t buy her products, but save me (and everyone else) from the excessive and unqualified stints on the soap box. Particularly the low rent junk posted above.

  33. I was more pissed off when she hid her diabetes and pushed her unhealthy food until she had a money deal to promote a diabetes drug. But then, I’m fat and not black.

  34. mdr

    what i dont get is why its ok for black folks to be calling each other the nword and white folks cracker and u hear no one screaming racism

    • Why do you ASSUME that it’s “Okay” for Black Folks to use it? If your so upset about it,why not raise the issue when it happens instead of pulling out that B.S Double Standard Argument.

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