Working For Paula Abdul is Rewarding

By: The Superficial / August 12, 2011

We’re into lists this week. Lists that show just how far celebrities are up their own asses that they’ve declared themselves Queen of Sphinctertown and demand a parade in their honor. So here’s Paula Abdul list of requirements for anyone who wants to be her assistant, and let me be the first to say, how the hell is bar tending experience not one of these? Us Magazine reports:

Each assistant must carry and use a tape recorder at all times “because she doesn’t trust her own conversations,” the source says.
“She also makes them check the TiVo for any mention of her and put it on a DVD.”
Abdul team members should also prepare to go through her email — and respond to family and friends as the star herself.
The “Forever Your Girl” singer also needed constant reminders that she is a “warrior, survivor and gift,” adds the insider.

Shorter version:

1. I say crazy shit.
2. I want crazy shit.
3. See #1.
4. See #2.

There. Small enough to tattoo on their foreheads. You’re welcome.

Photos: Getty