Paris Hilton’s virginity mystery solved

March 27th, 2007 // 94 Comments
superficial

  1. gambitzero

    First. Just so no one else can have it

  2. no1justminda

    All of a sudden she likes to pretend she has boobs…it’s silly.

  3. gambitzero

    Now That First crap is over. I’ve always wondered about Paris. I mean would you hit that or not. And disregard the myriad or diseases you would catch.

  4. veggi

    I don’t understand. Did we just find out Paris is from the moon?

    I shouldn’t have drank so much last night… ugggg!

  5. Z-Star

    Bah, not a day goes by without something ridiculous revealed about this attention whore of a woman….a nasty woman.

  6. flavio

    I am really, really surprised that the general public hasn’t made more, or at least some, of a big deal about Paris’ breast implants. Those are not her ta-ta’s!! Since when do boobs grow that much overnite and the media remains silent? Is this America anymore???

  7. veggi

    I’m trying my very best to keep my veggi sandwich down, but looking at that corpse fondle that alien transvestite induces my gag reflex.

  8. schack

    hahahaha

  9. schack

    nice dress, though- on the thing next to the corpse. really nice dress.

  10. mismint

    The new boobs are just another step in her gender reassignment…one day Paris you will be a ‘real’ woman.

  11. bex*

    Now is it me or has her sister got new mystery boobs too??

    Maybe they got a 4 for 2 deal!?

  12. potentiial

    When did Paris’s boobs come?

  13. Ossie19

    I thought for sure she would have lost her virginity when she was 11 or 12. I guess she was probably the slut 6th grader touching boy’s penises for lunch money. Not because she needed the money but because it looked good on her resume.

  14. almostfamous

    I like the one where she’s dancing and all the guys around her are actually just ignoring her. And her watch is apparently ridiculously huge

  15. MethodX

    Check out the feeders on Paris. Did she get those for her birthday or ‘just because?’

  16. leezastudio

    so Firecrotch dying her hair fucking blond is more news, like all over the globe news, than herpies whore getting breast implants, i mean, who did she pay to keep this freaking quiet, i mean, they are there and they are huge and they are plastic, ‘cmon, this is not big news anymore, WAAaaaa

  17. Sheva

    Didn’t think there was anything wrong with the original pair but if that’s what you need to do to compensate for the herp down below and the cooters running around, okay go ahead.

    Now we’ll have dozens of pictures of her and every other one will be her staring at her taters.

    Just when you thought an attention whore can get no worse.

  18. xeurohottiex

    Damn that skank is really ugly. Who are the morons who keep taking pictures of this ugly prostitute.

  19. Binky

    She still says that’s the only spelling she remembers from school.

  20. veggi

    19- hahahahah!!!

  21. schack

    y’all- it COULD just be those silicone bra inserts. everytime we’ve seen the tittays this big, it’s always been with a bra. until we see bikini shots, we don’t know for sure.

  22. JaeMae

    #13- “looked good on her resume” HA!

    Paris cracks me up because shes so nasty, yet she always has that look on her face like shes the hottest woman alive.

  23. tasje

    Unless i see some photographic evidence, i won’t believe she’s got implants. Anyone know the release date of her new home-vid?

  24. veggi

    That boy can dance!

  25. She looks like a cheap male prostitute. The fake boobs are the cherries on the cake.

    She’s gross, the more I look at her, the more I am in love with Bruce Willis daugther.

  26. chiris

    Good one, Binky #19 LOL

  27. schack

    rumer is beautiful. and paris has a lazy eye. and binky, really good.

  28. bungoone

    i’m not convinced either. look at the profile shot, there’s nothing there because she’s smooshed what little she had in & up.

  29. veggi

    schack…

    a lazy eye……………..

    and a penis.

  30. IFuckingHateYou

    Rumor Wills – fugly horse.

    Paris Hilton – fugly tranny.

    At least now we know what happened to Paris, all that Spelling ugly oozed all over her.

  31. veggi

    Tori must be pissed!

  32. supafreak

    The longer Hef touches her, the more the life is sucked out of him.

    She actually looks great…..unitl you have see her her head on.

  33. DrPhowstus

    This stupid bitch could be jumping on a trampoline during a fucking 9.0 earthquake and still could get her tits to bounce. All that styrofoam in her bra has increased her body weight by 50% at least. It’s sad really, because all of the tit you see there is literally all the tit she has.

    Fish, please show pics of Bai Ling’s tits. Interestingly enough, I think I’ll do take out for lunch.

  34. schack

    well, maybe all this bra stuffing is in preparation for the real thing. maybe she thinks we won’t notice if we get used to them looking that way.

    paris has a retractable penis.

  35. blondewithnobrain

    i think she got the implants for 2 reasons…1) Kim Kardashian’s monster knockers steal her limelight 2) Hef has been trying to get her in Playboy for a while now and she’s always said “no”, and i think she wouldn’t do it because she was always so small on top…i think she’s getting ready to say “yes”. My guess is she’ll be in Playboy within a year.

  36. fergernauster

    Look at Hef. Just look at him.

    That geriatric, cod-lipped tycoon is still going strong. Guess that’s what banging (or at least pretending to bang) harems of 25 yr.-old blonde starlets can do for you.

    Too bad when he dies, he’s going directly to hell.

  37. Jimbo

    There is no way you can stuff enough toilet paper in her bra to get her tits to look that big.

  38. jrzmommy♠

    I like little bits of chopped hardboiled egg in my tuna salad! Delish!!

  39. WTFiswrongwithUppl

    Now Paris is going after Holly’s man. Ooh I see a major catfight coming on!

  40. schack

    holly looks like a cartoon.

  41. I still say her mamma Kathy is still hotter…

  42. whitegold

    “He’s so ugly I imagine he’d be too afraid of himself to even masturbate.” That was hillarious haha!!!

    I never knew this Randy Spelling guy even existed! And why is he going around talking about other celebrities? Is this his big attempt to get his name in the gossip pages?

    And why does Paris keep looking really hot in pictures these days? It makes it very hard to understand how to feel about her?!

  43. ch474

    Why does Hef seem to be saying “Fresh meat … urgh … fresh meat good … must eat fresh meat”?

  44. jhndillion

    I heard him say this on the Howard Stern show, it was a very interesting interview, especially Rod Stewart’s kid talking about looking at his stop-mom sunbathing…

  45. kamihi

    ugh this man looks like her dead grandfather they have the sae ugly nose, this man is sick, much much sicker than her.

  46. B_rightside

    Has she gotten implants? There’s no way those tiny tits could ever look that big.

  47. she MUST have got a boob job……….they are like twice the size the used to be

  48. Puh-LEEZ!

    She is doing him a favor since they are friends by lying for him. He is a homo, she is helping him out by backing up the story.

  49. licklick

    Like her lower lip makes me puke like I’d rather fuck that funny corpse next to her than like. Like.

    Lick. Lick. not.

  50. licklick

    And like Bai LIng has got as much sexy as a withered tit.

    Lick. Lick. yuck.

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