Paris Hilton’s neighbor offers $27K/month to get rid of her

May 17th, 2009 // 65 Comments

Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt just moved into a new Hollywood Hills home last week, and already one neighbor is willing to fork out almost $30 grand a month to get her the fuck out. TMZ reports:

The neighbor says Hiltie is ruining his life. She’s lived there a grand total of 5 days … already cops have been called twice because of loud parties, screaming and yelling, and vandalism.
The house in the Hollywood Hills had been listed at $22,000 a month. So the neighbor is willing to give the landlord $27,000 a month if Paris goes away.
And get this … we’re told the neighbor complained to Doug yesterday about all the ruckus since Paris moved in. Doug said, “This is what you have to expect because Paris and I are public figures.”

Jesus. I’m pretty sure that last sentence alone is legal grounds for firing a gun into Doug Reinhardt’s nostril. Granted, it’s been a while since my law school days (Ladies?), we’re talking a clear case of self-defense here. — That was your cue to start shooting, so whenever.

Photos: WENN
superficial

  1. SoCalSteve

    FIRST

  2. SoCalSteve

    Second

  3. meee

    she looks really fucking weird. why do her armpits always look gross & her legs look like chicken bones?

  4. Potty Girl

    According to evolutionary psychology, males are attracted to women of child-bearing years who have symmetrical balanced and attractive facial features as well as wide hips (i.e., wider than a 12-year old boy’s hips but not as wide as K.K.’s hips). The facial features signal good health and genes.

    Hilton, with her wonky eye, surgically enhanced facial features, elongated torso that is out of proportion with her legs (fugly legs, as the photos reveal), and overly narrow hips, is not a good selection on this count. (Keep in mind that the real Paris Hilton is not a Photoshopped image but a herpes-laden skank who was ejaculated into by one of the double-chin twins, among many other genetically challenged males.)

  5. Anon

    Potty I think you summed her up.

    Good to see Genetically challenged females and males sticking together.
    Keep their gene pool to themselves.

  6. vito

    On the other hand she IS a pretty good cocksucker!

  7. zorg: king of koalas

    There’s nothing wrong with her legs. She’s a freakin’ robot. That’s just the titanium sticking through. I mean, who the hell stands like that? It hurts just to look at.

    I’m sure, if that $27k/month wasn’t enough, the internetz could just start up a collection to get them kicked out of whatever craphole she’s living in currently. Technically, isn’t the thing now classed as a whorehouse?

  8. #6 Yeah, if you like immortal super bugs homesteading on your cock! Yeah, she gives good head with EXTRA sauce. Uck!

    Arson anyone? LOL

    To cleanse our palate from this filth, check out:

    http://reverbnation.com/lovebomb

  9. #6 Yeah, if you like immortal super bugs homesteading on your cock! Yeah, she gives good head with EXTRA sauce. Uck!

    Arson anyone? LOL

    To cleanse your palate from this filth, check out:

    http://reverbnation.com/lovebomb

  10. Ellen

    Superficial writer – You ARE the In It But Not Of It writer. I KNEW it!

  11. AlxH

    im sorry but sriously can anyone remember why she is famous?
    and why do people still care about her?

  12. Public figures? HA!

  13. Rachell

    Marcus LOL…

    Yeah that statement about being public figures is BS. I hate people that think they have a right to be an annoying shitfucker simply because they have money and get their photos taken.

  14. freddo

    I’m pretty sure that for 27k one could find someone willing to insert a bullet into each of their skulls.

    Just sayin’….

  15. Christina

    He’s not even that hot, in my opinion he’s average. Paris is starting to look like an insect with human skin and a wig.

  16. t

    um, if you didnt put every little move they make into your blog, they might not actually be public figures

  17. larrythecableguy

    Obviously both of these idiots (public Figures) escaped from the Barby and Ken display from the Night at the Museum set and were never recaptured
    what a total waste of carbon dioxide

  18. mitch

    looks like he’s posing with his favorite walking stick

  19. kara

    too big shoes…

  20. Potty Girl

    Here’s a fantasy: The neighbor pays 27K to boys from the cartel to kidnap Paris and Doug. They are then taken to a remote location where they are buried up to their necks. Then, with camera rolling, a naked Kim K. sits first on Doug’s head while Paris watches Doug suffocate, then on Paris’s head. While suffocating Paris with her butt cheeks, Kim explains that this is her revenge for Paris comparing Kim’s ass to a cottage cheese filled garbage bag. Neighbor puts the video on the web and gets a huge return on his investment, and Governor Schwarzenegger holds a press conference to thank the neighbor for his public service. The excrement saturated heads of Paris and Doug are preserved in transparent containers and put on display at the Smithsonian, and are then auctioned by Sotheby’s, and the highest bidder is Angelina Jolie, who files for divorce after catching Brad having sex with the heads.

  21. smarg

    As long as she can deep throat a cock and take it up the ass, she’s OK in my book.

  22. unbeliever

    #21

    Like your brother is ‘ok in your book’, you mean? He can do those things too.

    Raise your standards man!

  23. immune

    every time she poses leaning backward like a f*$#&^g idiot, an angel loses it’s wings. :-(

  24. dirk

    I’d give her 2,700 yen to suckle my seran wrapped nuts. Herpes whore.

  25. Yoda

    Shit, two bullets are cheaper than $30K a month.

  26. Funeral Guy

    Too bad Charles Manson is still locked up. I bet he could find out where this house is.

  27. ew

    CAN ANYONE SAY SKELETOR?

  28. SlowMonkey

    I can’t tell him and Tori Spelling’s husband apart. Which one is from Canada?

  29. Paris Hilton, She is a cool chic. Maybe a little bit of hand full. She like’s being notice. But I sure has the heart of gold. She been helping hand when someone needs hand out. She speaks her mind. Their is nothing wrong with that.

  30. Who the hell stands like this?

  31. Dan

    She looks like a mummy.

  32. 1moreidiotintheworld

    Shit…. for 27K I’d “get rid” of her. Hell, I’d take $1.50 for the cost of the bullet…..

  33. He could hire a hitman for less and put us all out of the misery that is Paris Hilton.

  34. rey

    Are these two tools wax dummies or what? She looks like an extra from Zoolander with the risiculous poses! She is truly a fucking CLOWN!

  35. NastyBedazzler

    That main picture is like douche-o-rama.

    What the fuck is going on here?

  36. NastyBedazzler

    Also, I feel bad for Ryan Reynolds only because Doug Reinhardt only slightly resembles him. Shitty.

  37. --------------------VERY RELEVANT COMMENT-------------------------

    I just busted a nut to that second picture of Paris. She looks sooooo fiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnne!!!! Her lofty smug look has always turned me on. She is kind of skanky in some ways, but if she was at a party, or in your class at school, or in your office at work, most of you guys know you would be checking her out and want to fuck her. And girls you know that most of you are thanking god that a person does not have to be perfect to be fuckable, Otherwise, why would you be so attracted to your orangutang boyfriend, and he to moosefaced you?Paris’ nose and eye and body are all within the standard deviation from perfection that allows her to still be quite attractive.

  38. Creepy shoulders, but her feet don’t look as gigantic to me in those shoes. At least Parisites parasite Doug is showing a shred of dignity in these pics.

  39. Doug's massive ego

    @29..
    WTF? If anyone has a heart of gold, surely it is not Paris Hilton.

  40. want to fuck

    click name

  41. Carolyn

    #29. Wtf? A cool chic? As for the rest of it I have no idea what you’ve said.

  42. I thought after being in jail and having all those touch feely I-learned-my-lesson, post-can interviews, she’ll grow up and be actually a respectable person. I pity her. She should learn something or two from Nicole Richie who has family now and even started a foundation.

    click my name to check my website, thanks.

  43. %^$#@!

    #29 Why the fuck don’t you just go back to writing those incoherent spamming website posts?

  44. Mr. Jones

    Ever see those T-shirts back in the 70s “Keep On Truck’n?”. Paris seems to actually walk and stand like that.

    Seriously, what is her problem? Is she sway-backed? Or is she just retarded?

  45. Who the fuck is Doug Reinhardt anyways? Isn’t he only famous because he’s dating Paris Hilton…who is only famous because she is a rich whore.

    Goddamn…remember when celebrities actually had to DO SOMETHING to be famous?

  46. grobpilot

    “This is what you have to expect because Paris and I are public figures.” Are you fucking kidding me? I would have smashed his fucking skull into the curb as I told him “this is what you have to expect every time you act like a public figure.” Fucking entitled motherfuckers.

  47. Pilatunes

    I have a deal for the landlord. I could use some cash, and he wants to get rid of Reinhardt, so he should pay me $27k to beat the snot out of him. If one beating doesn’t work, I’d do it again next month. Sooner or later, he’d move, and I could pay off my debts.

  48. man she looks anarexic in some of her pics
    http://www.arobcorp.com/indexParis.html

  49. TODA

    Oh, Christian Louboutin. So beautiful. Does anyone know what these shoes are called/where to find?

  50. Mr Semprini

    A ten meter meteorite would wipe out half the world’s population. Hmmm, yeah let’s go with that. Only a 25% chance we would BOTH still be alive.

Leave A Comment