Paris Hilton’s house burgled, $2 mil in jewelry stolen

December 19th, 2008 // 66 Comments

Somebody broke into Paris Hilton’s house that she earned all by herself thanks to a healthy dose of hard work and karma. The burglary took place early this morning and with surprising ease, according to TMZ:

According to cops, a man in a hooded sweatshirt forced entry into her front door and ransacked her bedroom. Preliminary reports indicate $2 mil in jewelry and other belongings were taken.

So, $2 million in jewelry, but she can’t spring for ADT. Social Darwinism, I love you.

Photos: WENN
superficial

  1. The whole time she was in the bed saying: “I’m over here.. Are you here to rape me? Oh, no, please don’t rape me! Hey, wait! you are leaving? I thought you were going to… oh shit… lost another one…”

    http://internetmiscellanea.blogspot.com/

  2. Obama the Messiah

    I did it. I am just trying to “Spread the Wealth”.

  3. b

    Its about time i get what i wanted for christmas!!

  4. BigSteamyOne

    Wow, she is one unlucky person , guess she will have to make another crappy burger commercial to make up for her loss.

  5. It was Greasy Bear…or a publicity stunt…

  6. whattheFFFF

    don’t tell me she doesn’t have a security system or cameras on that multi-million dollar property. if she doesn’t have anything like that….wow, she totally deserved this.

  7. bakinmycake

    2 million in fake jewelry….thats a whole lotta nothin

  8. Ted Mosby

    He forced entry and went for the bedroom? Probably Herpes Rage.

  9. SouthAfricanHotti

    South Africa Rocks…….

  10. Uncle Eccoli

    Nobody but the queen should have that much in jewels in the first place.

  11. Anonymous

    The guy ransacked her bedroom? He’s going to need a good scrubbing.

  12. p0nk

    probably the same people that stole her Faberge Egg a while back.

  13. jt

    one word: jared’s

  14. havoc

    I’d dip all that fucking jewelry in bleach.

    Just in case….

    .

  15. Truth doctor

    OJ did it

  16. Vince Lombardi

    Bwah-ha-ha-ha-haaa!

  17. grobpilot

    He saw her lying in bed and was thinking of tapping her, then remembered all the shit he’s read about her on this site and thought, “hey, I can make off with $2 mil AND keep my dick” and walked away.

  18. Mr. Jones

    All they need to do is scan suspects for signature viruses and bacteria.

    They can catch him herpe-handed.

  19. Kurgen99

    At least we’ll get another sex tape out of it…

  20. angielee

    lol, i cant help but laugh after she just blabbed about how awesome her house is in the previous post

  21. angielee

    lol, i cant help but laugh after she just blabbed about how awesome her house is in the previous post

  22. Plobes

    Ha ha!!!!

  23. Vince Lombardi

    My guess is: During her long 22-day stay in jail, PH befriended the suspect, gave her home address, phone number, IM name, and her alarm code to her new friend – let’s call her “Lindsey” – and invited her to drop by any time. So “Lindsey” got out of jail, see? She told her lesbian pal – let’s call her “Sam” – about Paris’s invitation. So “Sam,” being someone who prefers to dress and characterize herself as the dominant male role in the relationship, dropped by as per the personal invitation. Sam, feeling that it was Christmas and she hadn’t gotten anything for “Lindsey,” decided to “borrow” some stuff.

    It’s all good clean lesbian fun.

  24. After that, the hooded robber continued on his rampage and robbed another CHICKDOWNTOWN

  25. Is that Tito Ortiz?

    Wow! Tito Ortiz and Jenna Jameson look so healthy in your photographs!

  26. KC

    You might want to goggle the difference between “robbery” and “burglary.”

  27. MC

    I love how karma has come back to take shit she doesn’t deserve.

  28. dork

    I guess her karma wasn’t good enough for a house with a safe.

    Just for spite, the burglar probably took all the dresses she was saving for her kids… I would.

  29. dragon43078

    Nice scam. You get/inherit/suck for, 2 million in jewelry, buy 200 dollars in fake jewerly, have the fake stolen and claim insurance on 2 million real stuff. Nice.

  30. Dar

    $2 mil in jewelry. $0 on security.

    Gotta love people who are rich and stupid. Eventually, they’re just stupid.

  31. Dan

    “So, $2 million in jewelry, but she can’t spring for ADT.”

    That’s because this never actually happened. Her publicist himself might’ve done it; I dunno. There’s no jewelry. Her only point of interest is that she’s “rich”–her family’s rich. She’s low on cash and if everyone knows it, she’ll have to do the whole “Britney Spears crazy” thing to keep interest.

    They phoned in a fake report to try to convince everyone that she had $2 million in jewelry just lying around. She didn’t. She doesn’t. She never did.

  32. RIP Superficial

    thanks for the chuckle #24…see people? that’s actually funny.
    It reminds me of the old superficial writer…Vince Lombardi, why aren’t you writing in this site?
    New Superficial writer: You are not funny. Get out.

  33. Eva

    Oh puleeze!

    I remember the Mothers Day gifts that were stolen from Paris before she could have given her mom, supposedly containing $10,000 worth of stuff. Gimme a break.

    The only things Paris had that was worth stealing was the engagement rings that Paris Latsis gave her: a $5 million 24 carat canary diamond ring and a $2.1 million 15 carat white diamond ring. I think she sold those on Ebay.

    We all know everything else (the real jewelry) is pretty much borrowed from Jacob the Jeweler.

  34. blank

    She hid the jewelry in her crouch cause, yes, there’s just that much room for penis, i mean things.

  35. fearsarewishes

    goggle = Google
    crouch = crotch

    JFC, I hate you morons

  36. nommer

    does no one else notice how weird her right hand looks?

  37. mm

    Ha, there’s her karma.

  38. Bob Frapples

    Not buying the story.

    No one has ever had to “force entry into her front door”.

    BooooooYAH!

  39. boo

    Hasn’t this been done before? I seem to recall Lindsay claiming a purse with jewels being stolen. These pubicity whores need to come up with a new schtick. Rehab, jail, drunk driving, pornos, millions of dollars of jewels stolen, fake weddings, fake lesbian relationships. It’s ALL getting old.

  40. n

    Yeah…what is up with her arms in pic 1??? How is that possible?

  41. PostmortemG

    “These pubicity whores need to come up with a new schtick. Rehab, jail, drunk driving, pornos, millions of dollars of jewels stolen, fake weddings, fake lesbian relationships. It’s ALL getting old.”

    I agree. I think the only kind of publicity stunt that will arouse my interest in these whores now, is nothing less than violent physical injury.

  42. hahahahahaha !!!!!

    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    that’s hot fuckers.

  43. She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?

  44. indiana

    You don’t mean Social Darwinism. You mean Darwinism. Social Darwinism pertains to ethnic and racial groups; Darwinism to individuals.

  45. mimi

    After all those pictures of Kim Kardashaskank, Paris Herpes Hilton looks good. That’s how disgusting and nasty that maggot Kim K is.

    Pray for Amy!

  46. 1moreidiotintheworld

    Who fucking cares??? Paris losing 2 million in jewelry is like one of us losing a dollar in a Pepsi Machine….. at least we can get the satisfaction of kicking the shit out of the machine.

  47. Vince Lombardi

    @41 – There’s a chick on PH’s right holding her arm – leather sleeve. PH has bare arms. Otherwise, yeah, physically impossible.

  48. lonelilylana

    Actually the vapid cunt left her front door unlocked.

  49. theOutsider

    So:
    Breaks in.
    Finds the bedroom in which I am assuming to be a fairly large house with more than 1 bedroom.
    In the bedroom, finds the $2million of jewelry.
    Bounces out and doesn’t get caught by the police.
    But they know he was wearing a hooded sweatshirt?

    Maybe the actual story explains that, but I’m too lazy to click through and see, so I am going to assume it doesn’t and I am awesome.

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