Paris Hilton still has magical breasts

April 17th, 2007 // 144 Comments
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Splash News

Paris Hilton and her new boytoy Josh Henderson, were spotted at Saddle Ranch getting dinner. And I thnk I finally figured out why she’s trying so hard to inflate her boobs. Either she got mistaken for a dude one too many times or she finally bought a mirror and saw her face. When she’s not wearing her magic bra, people on the street probably think they’re a gay couple. And when she does wear her magic bra, uh, people still think they’re a gay couple. Seriously, what’s up with this Josh Henderson character? His name says man but his face says pretty daffodil girl.

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  1. honeycombs_big_yeahyeahyeah!

    I’d have no qualms about curbing her head. Just sayin.

  2. Beazel

    Bit weird how they increase and decrease in size

  3. Adrianus Smith

    .
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    WOW, her nipples must be tire valves…
    .
    .
    .

  4. honeycombs_big_yeahyeahyeah!

    Superfish fella, you changed your comment! It’s much funnier now I must say. “his face says pretty daffodil girl.” That’s going in the vault.

  5. Anexio

    Her titties are the best thing about her.

  6. mmmBitch

    I smell a BRAVA bra….

  7. Nsomniac

    I’m too scared to open the pictures for a closer look. Last time I got chlamydia through the monitor. This chic has strains of STD’s that could bring down modern civilization.

  8. Jimbo

    WOOOO HOOOO The big boobies are back. She looks so much better with big tits

  9. veggi

    Look Joshy washy. I can write things. I was learned this yesterday. My name is spelled

    %&*@$%.

    Now lets go to sea world and take our pants off.

  10. guymorgan

    “And I thnk I finally figured out”

    haha, superfish can’t spell.

  11. BigJim

    She’s even more delusional that John Travolta if she thinks those are fooling anyone.

  12. Lowlands

    I didn’t expect her single braincell would split itself in two that fast.

  13. biatcho

    So, AdriANUS Smith, is there some type of conspiracy we should know about?

  14. D'arcy

    Ah… her boobs are like ripe fruit. I just want to — *fingers twitch* … well, I won’t get too detailed.

  15. Jimbo

    do tell D’arcy. we would love to hear what you would like to do with that ripe fruit

  16. Lowlands

    According to the sizes of her two braincells,she must be pretty intelligent now.

  17. lambman

    What’s going on with this post? There’s no news story and no jokes…its just pictures and rambling.

  18. Juliabella

    Maybe it’s just me but she really has small titties…more like moskito bites. HOW THE HELL COULD A BRA PUSH THEM LIKE THAT??? It comes with extra skin??? What the fuck??

  19. tits_on_snack

    Sooooooooooooooooooooo… we all know she’s flat. So what’s the deal with the sudden boobs-out-of-nowhere-and-constantly-on-display.

  20. wedgeone

    Someone tell me where Richport, jrz, and AFJ are hanging out, please. Why are they hiding from me?

    This is prom night all over again.

  21. Fishstick

    boring. *yawn* I dont come to work to actually DO WORK, i come to dick around on the internet all day and be entertained. C’mon people, let’s make an effort shall we?

  22. Cho Seung-Hui

    I’d like to have a SHOT at being her boyfriend.

  23. katzie

    im not gonna sit here and bash hiltons chest b/c i can sympathize with the small girls being one of them myself… but dang yo someones gotta give me the name of that bra she uses. i would mind having magical breasts.

  24. Juliabella

    22
    It’s a little too early for your post to be funny.

  25. #4 what did it used to say?

    #19 when is she NOT on “display”?

  26. Juliabella

    what do guys think of that? you meet a girl in a club, she’s hot and full and, when you bring her home for the “lets get to know each other” she takes off her top and bra and has nothing left…doesn’t it piss you off?

  27. crestlin

    Josh actually LOOKS like a pretty daffodil. Seriously, how much more sculpted can those eyebrows look?

    …And I KNEW that was just a bra. Seriously Paris, you have the money, just buy some permanent ones.

  28. Lowlands

    26)If i would find a pile of 20-dollar billets as well in her bra,i wouldn’t mind.

  29. katzie

    permanent ones can look like shit tho. its good that she hasnt fallen into societies model of what “the perfect chest” is supposed to look like. even tho she is by far nothing like a role model for young adults its good that shes not promoting surgery like that. if a bra works good enough to give u THAT much cleavage why use the money or go thru the pain of all that. plus. if any guy is a decent guy the boob size shouldnt matter.

    im done with the serious posting..=P

  30. Juliabella

    28
    wouldn’t you be looking on the floor to see if she dropped them??? start crying cauze you think it’s your fault…grabbed them too hard and it squashed them??? it freaks me out! it’s like meeting a guy (for me)with a banana in his pants…take them off and out I go!

  31. I have a magical flute. It’s made of skin.

  32. Juliabella

    31
    now you’re talking!!! i say no to fur but YES to skin!!!

  33. Cho Seung-Hui

    So today I saw on the charts that “Let’s Do the Hokie (Pokie)” is suddenly #33 with a bullet.

  34. Binky

    Apparently Pledge ™ furniture polish with orange oil will get you the same color for a lot cheaper than the stuff Paris uses.

  35. Negatrice

    Is it me or do her boobs look totally square in frontal shots?

  36. Fishstick

    mmmm…square boobs.

  37. FRIST!!!

    #33 You are a sick individual

  38. FRIST!!!

    #21 I’m with you there. I sit here for 8 hours, but I only do about 15 minutes of actual work a day.

    So these posts better get more exciting than stupid fucking Paris boobs SOON!!!

    Plus I’m hung over, so I’m not moving from my chair today :(

  39. imran karim

    amazing bra

  40. I like the super boobies.

  41. ballie

    hey binky! Chu Seung-Hui was korean! I smell a nice little conspiracy theorie here!

  42. Fishstick

    I wonder if anyone in my office would notice the blood if i begin to methodically bang my head against the monitor….

  43. wedgeone

    There should be a warning on bottles of Anal-Eze. Sure, I was quite the daredevil last night, but today I can barely fucking walk! Talk about “Fissure Price Toys” ….

  44. I wish I was Josh Henderson’s penis, cause I would somehow convert my sperm to battery acid so when my owner blows my load on Paris’s face, she gets a much needed face lift. Sure her skin would be melting off her skull but you gotta love the ”do it urself” makeover!

    GROSS? UR RIGHT THAT WAS!

  45. LoneWolf

    If the universe was fair, she would have been a student at Virginia Tech.

  46. FRIST!!!

    #42, if yours is anything like mine, they wouldn’t notice if you stuck your letter opener into a power outlet and fried the whole building.

    #43 what?!?!?

  47. Jimbo

    FRIST – Thanks for the web site. They had some good videos

  48. 45

    Paris and college? Those go together like Chinese food and chocolate pudding.

  49. Jimbo

    @45 if the universe was fair, Paris would come back as Britey’s Spears tampon

  50. Fishstick

    Frist – thanks for the idea! At least I’ve got a better rack then Paris – so thats comforting.

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