Paris Hilton rebounds with Cristiano Ronaldo

June 11th, 2009 // 85 Comments

Just 24 hours after breaking up with Doug Reinhardt, Paris Hilton continues her quest to unleash an itchy apocalypse upon the world by hooking up with Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo last night. The Sun reports:

“She was clearly flying under the radar with her sister. She had a couple of cocktails and she was fiddling with her phone throughout the entire meal.”
The pair then headed to MyHouse at 11.20pm and Paris made a beeline for Ronaldo’s table. The Portuguese star left the club with Paris at 3am and drove to Nicky’s pad in West Hollywood. He was spotted leaving at 5am, sporting trademark grin.

I’m going to have to call bullshit on this story because here’s topless photos from last August of Ronaldo’s ex Nereida Gallardo who is an insane calibre of woman. Hooking up with Paris would be like going from Megan Fox to sticking your penis in a blender that can talk and has a lazy eye. Who does that?


  1. Sport

    Hey Mullet Nation.

    Dont come on our sites to talk about our fucked up celebrities and try to preach us about Futbol. Its fucking soccer over here and all of our kids play it.

  2. therush

    “sail away into mexico – June 11, 2009 4:11 PM

    Douche + Douchette.”

    FTW. Put this story in perspective.

    Fuck Ronaldo. I can’t wait until his career falters at Real Madrid because he’s not surrounded by amazing talent (Rooney, Carrick, Evra, Tevez, Berba etc) and perhaps the greatest manager in football history. Manure doesn’t give a shit that this diving tool is leaving. They’ll take the $131 million, probably buy Ribery and Lavezzi and thank fascist Real for vastly overpaying for a gutless pretty boy.

  3. Rickyvega

    Cristiano Ronaldo only the best soccer player in the world, and the most famous man in the world except in usa.

  4. Tanzarian

    Thankfully Paris is pushing up, cause if I’m gonna jerk off to a fantasy it better be as fantastical as it can get. Bonus for covering the knees and feet.

  5. Monica

    As a portuguese girl, I am officially disgusted and mortified.

  6. Porto

    Ignorants Americans stop calling “soccer” to futbol,….that is a made up word, (soccer) it does not exist, educate yourself…stupid ignorants

  7. Dr.Salazar

    Hey americans,you haved the ass kicked in vietnam.
    you have been beaten by people using woodsticks and arrows as weapons.

  8. ishi-san

    @ 24: READ! a lot of people do apparently – I didn’t start that discussion…..

  9. Lizz

    @ 29: Ever heard of Rugby? who are calling sissy now? *lol*

    Why is it that Americans always need to insult other people? It is ok to correct other people when they’re wrong, but do it with arguments and a tiny bit of decency! Take an example from # 25!

  10. KoRneY

    whatever, fuck soccer

  11. mu

    good to see that he and rooney hang out off the pitch

  12. devilsrain

    Thats nice, what did that take all of 4 days? Put another notch in that lipstick case Paris. Although who am I kidding, it would take a 100 ft wall to accommodate all the notches.

  13. CrunchPop

    Since when is Ricky Martin a soccer player?

  14. LMS

    Spreading the herpes one dude at a time…

  15. thandi

    oh paris
    u lucky lucky fish

  16. God, look at that big Italian un-Waspy nose of hers. And remember…naturally BROWN eyes.

  17. Ginzo nose and brown eyes.

  18. Ginzo nose and brown eyes.

  19. Cathy

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    you can experience the site *******C o u g a r C i r c l e . c o m******** you can sign up for free. it is very good a place!HAVE A TRY!!!!

  20. unite pangea

    You’re all so full of shit.

    The Europeans that come to this website to feel superior over comments posted by the dregs of internet society are part of that populace.

    Not that I expect any of you ridiculously idiotic patriots, mindlessly championing your countries and nations, to understand anything other than too much beer and sports.

    Viva La Evolution!!

  21. ishi-san

    @ 70: True – we have good beer and superior sports! Thanks for noting that! :)

  22. Rhialto

    I’ve no idea how she did it.Due the crisis her price was dropping a bit.But maybe this will keep her from the crisis.Lol business first.

  23. Darth

    She must have a guardian angel sitting on her shoulder.Probably a dark angel in her case.

  24. Nero

    Is that Nicky Hilton dressed in the jaguar print?

  25. fons

    messi is so much better than this loser.

  26. Kelsey

    He looks like an even bigger douche than the last dude, I didn’t think that was possible.

  27. Michelle

    His shocking taste in women continues then.

  28. Anon

    It’s football. Stop defending yourselves Americans.

  29. RtSS

    Damn… Almost an upskirt shot on Ashley, Paris is just disgusting, but I’d do her little sister. Agreed all you non-American losers STFU about soccer vs. football. Why is it called World Cup Soccer ? Duh? Also, just a bit gay to have him wearing a pearl necklace. Wow, if that doesn’t scream fag-eee-toe, I don’t know what does. I want an upskirt shot of Ashley and that leporad print skirt.

  30. Erica

    He is so gorgeous.

  31. desmond

    It will be funny if he contracted some disease from paris hilton and then he is unable to play for real madrid anymore.

  32. John

    Did you just compare Nereida Gallardo to Megan Fox?
    That’s like comparing decaying roadkill to a cheese steak.

  33. Arroyo

    I’m guessing that Cristiano could afford her fee for anal?

  34. flygirl

    WTF christiano ronaldo is too gud for that paris fag and he is damn hawt!!!!!
    i didn’t believe this shit untill i saw pics 1 and 2 the wall is exactly the same!

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