Paris Hilton rebounds with Cristiano Ronaldo

June 11th, 2009 // 85 Comments

Just 24 hours after breaking up with Doug Reinhardt, Paris Hilton continues her quest to unleash an itchy apocalypse upon the world by hooking up with Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo last night. The Sun reports:

“She was clearly flying under the radar with her sister. She had a couple of cocktails and she was fiddling with her phone throughout the entire meal.”
The pair then headed to MyHouse at 11.20pm and Paris made a beeline for Ronaldo’s table. The Portuguese star left the club with Paris at 3am and drove to Nicky’s pad in West Hollywood. He was spotted leaving at 5am, sporting trademark grin.

I’m going to have to call bullshit on this story because here’s topless photos from last August of Ronaldo’s ex Nereida Gallardo who is an insane calibre of woman. Hooking up with Paris would be like going from Megan Fox to sticking your penis in a blender that can talk and has a lazy eye. Who does that?

superficial

  1. Joel

    First.

    Ronaldo’s portugese by the way…

  2. boogermeister

    Size 11 feet; just sayin; and possibly first

  3. ERICA

    that’s hot

  4. Javiera

    Tanta ignorancia!
    Ronaldo is from Portugal! and second, he is a Football player, not a soccer player. It does not mean that Football it is the same as “american football”, a sport that is not even play with the “foot”! and actually it is not as famous over the world.
    You are soooooooooooooo IGNORANT!

  5. lizzy

    god he’s so fucking beautiful, i hope it’s not true. paris is so undeserving of his hotness.

  6. ardjelina

    whoa… he is super hot!

  7. ERICA

    javiera, it is FUTBOL.

  8. Lol, just been sold to crappy Real Madrid for £80 000 000, and celebrating with Paris Hilton. His career is so over.

  9. takethecake

    @Javiera

    STFU

  10. bah

    enjoy your new herpes, soccer fag

  11. Soccer is an art, just because madison avenue didnt teach you to like it, it doesnt mean it sucks…now! they didnt get married fish, were talking about the queen of, see you, like you, fuck you on the spot….99% of relationship prone dudes will tap it…

  12. will bull

    @4

    your aware soccer is what americans call football?

    also, just proves hes gay really

  13. omg nooo

    #5 i totally agree with u

    i’ll still do him anyway lol i just lost the respect I had for him

  14. KoRneY

    #4

    we call it soccer in our country. now stfu before we revoke your green card

  15. miau

    damn ronaldo is the hottest male on the planet!!!!!!

    but paris hilton…???this cant be true…oh please..

  16. She’s not greta but a blender a little harsh

  17. angie

    holy shit that man is soooo hottt… but he seems like a total whore….

    and paris thats disgusting… shes sooo fucking nasty….

    and yes – she does have size 11 feet and wears blue contacts, what a loser.

  18. Kurgen99

    Hey, one night and a condom, why not.

  19. dirk

    Sooooo, good ol’ “Blisters the BoneBag” is spreading the love to every country.

  20. fearsarewishes

    @4

    Yo, Javiera. You did a shit job cleaning my pool and if you don’t improve your service I’ll have you sent back to that third world backwater you call home.

    Fuck you very much!

  21. fearsarewishesisgay

    im gay

  22. ishi-san

    @ 14: So? the rest of the world calls the ‘real’ football -> football and not soccer! So democratically that makes us the majority!
    And by the way – who wants your green card??? We have social security and health insurance for freeeeeeeee!!!! Viva Europa!!

  23. Zanna

    Who gives a fuck what he plays. I look at him and see a man who just contracted the Herp.

  24. rhetoric

    @22

    Who the fuck cares? Idiot.

  25. Anon

    #4 correct
    It’s football as that is the sports name.

    Just because some ignorants seem to think they can call it something else then thats its name is wrong.

    Its like everywhere in the world calling a car a car apart from one inbred country calling it a “horseless carriage” and then expecting the rest of the world to do the same!?!

    It was called football long before grid iron was invented and the reason grid iron is sometimes referred to as football is because grid iron is another sport who’s origins come from football.

    but then these jokers seem to think they can change a whole language’s spelling just because they’re too dumb to spell the words anyway but phonetically.

    Either way Ronaldo is a little girlie boy who throws tantrums and Utd are better off without him.

    He has no loyalty and integrity.
    He’s like an amalgamation of Thierry henry and Nikolas Anelka

  26. p0nk

    @9 my thoughts exactly word for word (or acronym for acronym).

  27. plaga7

    american idiots… jus as green Gay names your ignorant and belicius country!
    enougth of the american dream lie!! you´re ecomomy is dead!

    Football is great casu is cheap, what is wrong with that? cheap is good, cheap includes all people around the globe.

    and… i from Argentina, and i will never climb a pool

    ;) just do some adverstising.

  28. plaga7

    LARGA VIDA A BOCA JUNIORS!

    and what about the americans? can you speak another lenguage? do you care?
    jajajajaahahahaha

    so stupids… so belicius…

    Footbal the greatest sport in the world. Ehy? jsut because is cheap to play. that is very human.

    USA: OH! who cares i only cares about my yard! lests make some war and scream as assholes! jajajajahahaha

  29. Mr. Obvious

    Good god…. soccer/football, noodle/pasta… We know what you’re talking about. Plus, Ronaldo would be killed if he played american football.

    AF = bunch of guys who can take a hit, except for the kicker.
    WF = bunch of actors that fall down at the slightest touch.

    To appreciate AF, you have understand the strategy, planning, and execution of the sport. Yes, the action is not fluid but it’s not suppose to be. There are battlelines to be won and a frontline that moves at every play. It’s about a bunch of guys going out there trying to legally beat the crap out of each others. And that’s why it’s awesome. It’s a very raw sport. Not as raw as rugby. Those guys are insane.

    WF is a fluid sport where the game can instant turn.

    To each his own.

    BTW, I thought Ronaldo dumped that hot ex because she was a price hooker.

  30. Mr. Obvious

    Good god…. soccer/football, noodle/pasta… We know what you’re talking about. Plus, Ronaldo would be killed if he played american football.

    AF = bunch of guys who can take a hit, except for the kicker.
    WF = bunch of actors that fall down at the slightest touch.

    To appreciate AF, you have understand the strategy, planning, and execution of the sport. Yes, the action is not fluid but it’s not suppose to be. There are battlelines to be won and a frontline that moves at every play. It’s about a bunch of guys going out there trying to legally beat the crap out of each others. And that’s why it’s awesome. It’s a very raw sport. Not as raw as rugby. Those guys are insane.

    WF is a fluid sport where the game can instantly turn.

    To each his own.

    BTW, I thought Ronaldo dumped that hot ex because she was a price hooker.

  31. Hash

    Agora fala-se português aqui, é? Anyway, o ronaldo é uma besta, bronco nas horas, tem a pele toda destruida e aquele sotaque, jesus. Se ao menos as gajas/gays que comentam aqui percebessem as burrices que diz…

    [So we're speaking portuguese now, are we? Anyway, ronaldo is an ass, way too stupid, has his skin totally fucked up and his Madeira/street-kid accent, jesus. If only the girls/fags who post here could understand how dumb he sounds to someone who speaks his language...]

    Btw, “futbol” is spanish. If you wanna go for portuguese, it’s “futebol”. And Europe is not a country. Thanks America!

  32. Jack

    Cristiano won’t be grinning in 4 days………..that’s when he finds out he has herpes and/or syphilis. Probably by pissing blood and/or hurts like hell!

  33. plaga7

    HASH i think you prefferd MEssi….

  34. sail away into mexico

    Douche + Douchette.

  35. Hash

    plaga7, Ronaldo is without any doubt an above average player, he was great on United because he had a whole team playing -for- him. I personally prefer Real to Barça, so I hope he’s the best next year, but for now, Messi has the edge…

  36. Hash

    Great, now they can get their manicures done together. Looks like they already have.

  37. Hash

    #36, how ’bout not using my nick?

  38. Harsh

    I thought yours said Harsh. So I thought of Hash browns…

  39. BadMrFrosty

    I think ronaldo is miles away from the greatest futebol players in the world… but i wish he BANG HER HARD!! and keeps on scoring.. and i’m not talking about goals…

  40. Hash

    I don’t care what you saw. Don’t ever use my nick again, got it?

  41. Hash

    Slashing Slasher

  42. Superbiggerevil

    Paris the Virus strikes again! Ronaldo’s game will suffer and never be the same…I mean, how can you play futbol when your crank is dripping like a Ben & Jerry’s container in August?

  43. manny-o-matic

    @ 31, this man speaks the truth.

    Ronaldo is the supreme douche of douchebags (we call guys like him “mitras”, think of it as the portuguese version of british chavs), it would actually be fun watching him develop all sorts of STD’s.

    It’s fucking wrong to idolise these people and pitch them as role models. He has the mental ability of a mentally challenged amoeba and all he can do is kick a ball better than anyone else, there are football (or soccer, whatever) players as well as other athletes with much more value.

  44. N

    the rumors are trueeee…i went to my house in hollywood last night and they were literally together the WHOLLLLLLLLLE NIGHTTTTTT..she actually looked really pretty in person..he looked orange (fake tanned) and his eyebrows looked overly plucked lol

  45. William

    Cristiano Ronaldo Is the best Soccer player in the World and is according to a recent reliable study one of the most Famous/Popular Human being in the whole planet as well !

    The guy Hash number 31 is one tipical Portuguese Faggot !

    Actually all the Portuguese from the mainland i met so far are sissy faggot gays.

    Fortunately Cristiano Ronaldo is not from the mainland ! He is from Funchal – Madeira Island.

    Azores forever !

  46. PO

    HE HAS LONG NAILS!!!!!!!!!
    THATS VERY DISCOSTING

    IIIUUUUU

  47. Hash

    William, butthurt much? It’s not your fault they use young boys’ anus to lubricate cocks before doing your mom, back in the islands. Go die in a earthquake, inbred fucktard.

  48. plaga7

    The best player in the world at this moment is the european champion Leonel Messi.

    well people, is late, and i got a dinner with friends…

    Goodnight from a very cold Buenos Aires!

  49. Jacc

    I hope they don`t have anything. She’s a fuc*/&% bitch!

  50. Pedro

    #45, do you think he even remembers where madeira is? He doesn’t give a shit. Nor does he feel any kind of sympathy for you for being another poor immigrant from the archipelago, why do you even bother defending him here? Grow up man.

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