Paris Hilton had a shitty week

December 21st, 2008 // 31 Comments

So, remember when Paris Hilton’s house was broken into while she was at Christina Aguilera’s birthday party? Two fun facts about that: 1. TMZ reports Paris left the front door unlocked while relying solely on her chihuahua for security. And 2. Surprise! She wasn’t even invited to Christina’s party in the first place, according to Page Six:

Hilton and Flickinger were at LA restaurant Saam Thursday night in the private dining area when Christina Aguilera, who was celebrating her 28th birthday, walked in. “Christina was with hubby Jordan Bratman, Nicole Richie and Joel and Benji Madden,” our spy said. “Paris wasn’t invited and left shortly before they arrived so she wouldn’t have to see Benji or be asked to leave the private area for Christina.”

Didn’t Paris just say something about having great karma? Then again, when your vagina technically qualifies as a landfill, I guess getting robbed and becoming a social pariah still warrants a smiley face in your diary for the day:

“<3 At least nobody died from my genitals! Yay!! :D”

Photos: Pacific Coast News, WENN
superficial

  1. jaime

    i fart like a man.

  2. FedEx

    She looks like a fool.

  3. viva la vistroy

    Ouch – I actually feel a tiny tiny bit bad for her, sorry everyone, maybe its the holidays and the general feeling of good cheer that make me unable to laugh at her.

    HAPPY HOLIDAYS :D

  4. F-Obama

    WTF? Is she opening a new Indian Casino? Damn, Paris, if you want me to bang you, I need to see that outfit hit the floor FAST! Don’t even try and be sexy getting it off.

  5. PostmortemG

    The Navajo owned Fire Rock Casino just opened last month in Church Rock, New Mexico. Given the area’s infamous amount of drunks [ There was actually a documentary about the nearby city of Gallup on 20/20 concerning alcoholism years ago; Gallup was officially dubbed 'Drunk Town U.$.A.' ] and the politically incorrect humor of classic Westerns that mock Native Americans, I’d say Fire Water Casino is much more fitting. Paris Hilton is good for a laugh.

  6. dork

    27 is a tough age for anyone… to be 20 again and star as herself in Zoolander… those were the days…

  7. vagina landfill

    Yeah, I bet she has rancid pussy farts

  8. Tinkerbell

    Woof Woof Woof Woof Woof Woof Woof

    (translation: rápido llame a la policía)

    Woof Woof Woof Woof Woof Woof Woof

    (translation: Yo no soy una ramera pequeña)

  9. An unknown man entered Paris’s front door. What else is new?

    http://starcasm.net/archives/2247

  10. Loch Ness

    The more we see, and read about, Kim Kardashaskank the better this ignorant slut looks. She makes Paris look talented, educated and brimming with substance.

  11. What have you done?

    How do we know her vagina hasn’t killed anyone this week? I suspect her vagina devours any person unfortunate enough to get near it.

  12. Janie

    Are the rumours true that she has Herpes – or is it just a lie?

  13. Fernanado Narcos

    Goddammit,leave Paris alone!

    Mean shit like this will drive her away from us,and I really wanna wear her as a party hat on New Year’s Eve ( I figure her vagina’s about a size 8).

  14. Sport

    waste of flesh.

  15. jonny monstikio

    Yeah…..riiight. They snatched $2,000,000.00 worth of jewelry that was just lying around with the doors open. And I am the Prince of Persia! It’s all a big insurance scam. She probably lost $25,000.00 , TOPS! She probably arranged the whole thing in the first place. What a skank. The rich get richer.

  16. boo

    Gawd, I hate those idiotic headbands. NOBODY looks good in them but Paris looks especially stupid.

  17. scabbeus

    If you blur your vision while looking at the picture – she looks like a cock with a cock ring.

    She just seems kind of stenchy to me. Her mother is such an idiot it is quite possible she failed to tutor Paris on the wonders of feminine hygiene.

  18. sara

    goddammit, she’s the most glamorous hippie ever.

  19. She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?

  20. She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"” W e a l t h y D a t e r . c o m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?

  21. A panic situation?
    ……….IT LOOKS LIKE IT, folks!!

  22. ME

    no one mentioned the BBF winner Britney behind her in some pix. She is the one with the bitch face in most pix …the tag a long, sad that you need a show to help make friends ..you think ms. spears would be so desperate?

  23. Jeff W.

    I’m rooting for the robber! This pleases me for some reason. Perhaps because I despise people who walk around with an undeserved sense of entitlement.

  24. kak

    Why would the restaurant tell her to leave the private area because Christina Aguiwhateverhernameis came in? Sounds to me like she’s just reliving a skankier high school life.

  25. Sprmcandy

    Filthy nasty cuntress.

  26. She really is like a chameleon… but only because her wonky eye allows her to see two things at once.

  27. el ces

    Lets read between the lines here. It doesn’t matter if she was invited or not, you don’t turn away Paris Hilton. She is more famous than they are.

    Chris and the others were probably late, and Paris bailed after a bit.

  28. TRUTH

    PARIS HILTON IS GUILTY OF FEDERAL CRIMES AGAINST BRITNEY SPEARS AND BRANDON M. WITTE, A 32 YEAR OLD MAN FROM ARLINGTON, TEXAS. GOOGLE HIS NAME WITH : PARIS HILTON, RICK HILTON (HER FATHER,) AND NICKY HILTON. ALSO, GO TO PARIS HILTON ASKMEN.COM AND NICKY HILTON ASKMEN.COM FOR MORE PROOF OF THE FEDERAL CRIMES.

  29. REALITY

    PARIS HILTON AND RICK HILTON ARE GUILTY OF FEDERAL CRIMES AGAINST BRANDON M. WITTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  30. PARIS IS GOING TO PRISON

    FOR FEDERAL CRIMES COMMITED AGAINST BRITNEY SPEARS AND BRANDON M. WITTE. GO TO PARIS HILTON ASKMEN.COM AND NICKY HILTON ASKMEN.COM FOR MORE INFORMATION.

  31. PARIS IS GOING TO PRISON

    GO TO PARIS HILTON ASKMEN.COM AND NICKY HILTON ASKMEN.COM AND READ ALL COMMENTS!

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