Paris Hilton is hawking hair extensions now

July 15th, 2008 // 50 Comments

These are promotional shots for Paris Hilton’s new hair extension line DreamCatchers. You can check out the company site here if you absolutely hate your eyes, ears and sense of dignity. In the meantime, I’ve come up with some slogans to help Paris in her entrepreneurial pursuit:

DreamCatchers: Because you’ve stopped taking your meds and stole your grandmother’s purse. Get beautiful!

DreamCatchers: Look we gave her some money and figured she’d choke on the extensions during the development process. Who knew?

DreamCatchers: Or you can keep looking like a trash bag full of cottage cheese, Kim Kardashian.

DreamCatchers: Because you know who gives great hair advice? Chicks with herpes. That’s science. Hair science.

Photos: The Sun
superficial

  1. If she had a penis, shed be a lot hotter. Then Id actually want to be with her.

    And if she was black That would be even hotter!

  2. sillysalamander

    FIRST THUNDER-CUNTS!!!
    Booooyah!
    Suck on that!!!!

  3. oh yea…and FIRST & SECOND LOSERS!

  4. grammarfreak

    That’s “hawking” not “hocking,” unless she’s taking the hair extentions to a pawnshop to make a few bucks on them.

  5. err, third!

    sillysalamander, EAT A DICK FUCKTARD. You lost again!

  6. jen

    OMG…the extensions look SO FAKE, and ratty!

  7. bb

    #1 & #3: Do you have anything decent to say? For once, at least?

  8. sillysalamander

    I don’t care what anyone says man. Look at the first pic I would totally spread her legs and muff-dive that chicka.

  9. havoc

    Lame.

    .

  10. anything decent?…

    well, first of all FUCK YOU.

    Decent huh?..

    Ok, here goes:

    Im Gay, proud of it and am going to California to marry my partner of 4 years Shayquan. He will be an american citizen after our marriage and all you repukeblicans cant do anything about.

    GAY AND PROUD BITCHES!!!

  11. bb

    #5: By the look of the “quality” that you post on here, it probably goes without saying that your attempt at higher education was just that: An attempt.

  12. If Thy Eye Be Single Jones

    I’m really afraid of looking like a trash bag full of cottage cheese. I’ll take one extension please * hands over $3.99*

  13. @11 – FINALLY. Someone that agrees with me about him. Hes always shoving being gay etc down everyones throat. He also acts so elitest and above everyone else. High 5 for the comments!

  14. Has seen smarter looking parakeets

    First Photo – Paris finally smiles when the photographer’s assistant dazzles her by turning on a bright light

    Second Photo – Paris is confused when the light “goes away”

    Third Photo – Paris collapses with exhaustion from trying figure out where “The Shiny” went

  15. bb

    #13: Your welcome.

  16. Meg

    Is it just me or does her eye just keep getting lazier and lazier?

  17. Randal

    Very nice Paris! What a difference long hair makes on you, accenting your high cheek bones and rose pedal lips. We’ll be seeing a lot more of you no doubt now on the Fish.

    Randal

  18. Meg

    Is it just me or does her eye keep getting lazier and lazier?

  19. grobpilot

    Why has PETA not descended on this snag? Killing, skinning and wearing the fur of poor, helpless animals on your head is grounds for a lynching.

  20. kenny

    #19 grobpilot
    Why don’t you go dive in front of a truck to save a frog you fucking PETA retard.

  21. toolboy

    Dreamcatcher.. the cheapest way to hide that wonky ass fucked up eyeball.

    Elliot_Spitz_on_her…I am a Republican (for the most part). Congratulations, may you and yours have the ability to channel David Sedaris-esque type sarcasm at will and may all your furniture match the decor.

  22. Ferdinand Narcos

    I’d look deep into her wonky eye and say “I love you”,right before I splooged up her nostril….

  23. Ted from LA

    DreamCatcher: Because CumCatcher was already taken…

  24. sebastian

    #10 Elliot, with respect sir, do you see any one here posting they are heterosexual and proud? just keep it to yourself and don’t rub in faces of the people. this behavior is tacky. no one gives a shit.

  25. p0nk

    23. thanks Ted. that needed to be said.

  26. anonymous

    Where the fuck are her pupils

  27. A-Rod

    Some should kick that wonky-eyed cunt in her box.

    I’m just sayin.

  28. Superevil

    hey sillysalamander i think its time to leave moms basement

  29. mat

    She looks like she’s wearing a mask.

  30. Mr. Sleepyhead

    Maybe she’ll get tangled in her hair extensions, trip, fall and break her fricking neck. I would propose a national holiday if that occurred.

  31. Do_FreeBird

    I’m confused:

    How do you attach the extensions after you’ve shaved your coochie?

  32. cady

    She is really sexy. Many of her hot videos and sexy photos can be found on Fitness Loving Do Tcom.

  33. Paris Scrotum

    They don’t even mention you can get them at Sally’s Shitty Beauty Supply on their website. How convenient.

  34. grobpilot

    #20: If you had a modicum of intelligence, you would have recognized sarcasm when you read it.

  35. ToTellTheTruth

    Fucking nasty bitch needs to be selling Herpes cream.

  36. No matter how long the extensions are, you can’t hide your monster feet, Paris. Maybe a chainsaw will solve your problems. Good luck, Hilton.

  37. bondge ducky

    The video of the product under “see it” features South African Afrikaans singer Patricia Lewis (who dated the Hoff) and ex-gladiator Fire and Candice Hillabrand. Infact the images are the same ones they used to flog hair extensions in SA a couple of years ago.

  38. WeHateFags

    @ #10 (Elliot):

    FAGGOT

  39. WeHateFags

    @ #10 (Elliot):

    FAGGOT

  40. WeHateFags

    @ #10 (Elliot):

    FAGGOT

  41. WeHateFags

    @ #10 (Elliot):

    FAGGOT

  42. Duke Steele

    Hey sillysalamander. So, what you’re saying is that you want herpes???

  43. Wow… I see Mike Oxbhig has a lot of time on his hands… it would probably be easier if I really were gay… then I wouldn’t have to buy my wife so much shit. I thought you morons could figure out who was who, like when fake Frist pledges allegiance to Hitler and shit.

  44. HOOOPS!!
    I DID IT AGAIN?
    sorry, I was born stupid, but the name is paris.
    A CITY IN WEST-AFRICA!!

  45. Paris sucks ass

    Paris is and will always be a whore. Being famous for a sex tape is pathetic. I think she looks horrible. What’s going on with her eyes? She always looks droopy-eyed. Why anybody thinks she’s hot is fricken beyond me.

  46. Kim Lardassian

    Why not grow your hair Paris instead of fake shit? you are a repugnant talentless vapid slag now crawl under a stone this instant and take your fake fucking hair with you, NOW.

  47. Kim Lardassian

    Why not grow your hair Paris instead of fake shit? you are a repugnant talentless vapid slag now crawl under a stone this instant and take your fake fucking hair with you, NOW.

  48. Nicole Ritchie

    Its a good idea … i mean its one of the only things she is known for… her fake hair! and you know the little girls of america are going to be on this shit like white on rice!

  49. Sendy

    LoL/ She is really sexy!!! I have ever seen her hot video on the wealthy dating club R I C H L O V I N G.C O M for hot guys and girls to hook up for Hot Love and Sexy Dating. She is really sexy with bikini in that video.

  50. This is news?

    This isn’t anything new. DreamCatchers have been out for quite a while now. Read a magazine?

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