Paris Hilton got into the wrong SUV while leaving Crimson nightclub over the weekend. She had to climb over some poor bastard to get out. While this sorry son of a bitch had to go home and burn his clothes, and presumably his car, in the backyard, I’m left wondering; what the hell happened to Paris Hilton’s lips? Did she pay for those? If she wanted full and, uh, beautiful (?) lips, I would’ve done it for free. While some doctors with their fancy degrees might use collagen, I would’ve used a simple procedure on Paris called “anvil to the face.” Unfortunately, my work continues to be rejected by medical journals because, according to the letters, it would “make the field of medicine too goddamn awesome.” True story.
Photos: Pacific Coast News
Italian Stallion | December 3, 2007 at 12:11 pm
That’s funny, I was just talking about this in the last post……….
none | December 3, 2007 at 12:11 pm
FIRST
ManOverboard | December 3, 2007 at 12:13 pm
Did Thom Yorke of Radiohead get a sex change?
mkell | December 3, 2007 at 12:13 pm
Nice try, none.
Holy hell, who’d have thought it’d be possible to make this ugly skank even uglier than before? Those lips belong on a hagfish, which isn’t too far off!
steve | December 3, 2007 at 12:14 pm
My god, she’s beautiful.
Jumpin_J | December 3, 2007 at 12:17 pm
Good Lord. Just when you think she can’t possibly get any more retarded and shame the family, she finds a way. I’ll give it to her, she doesn’t give up. Do her parents know what the fcuk she’s doing? Do they realize that Jenna Jameson, uh, Paris is going to inherit the family business? Shouldn’t that immediately scre the living crap out of them? What’s wrong with these effin people? SHEEESH!!!
hotguy | December 3, 2007 at 12:19 pm
She was said to have a personal account on a millionaire&celebrity dating club MeetRich.com with her hot pictures and blogs there. Where is her new boyfriend recently?
carl | December 3, 2007 at 12:23 pm
HER MOUTH LOOKS LIKE A PUCKERED ANUS
carl | December 3, 2007 at 12:23 pm
HER MOUTH LOOKS LIKE A PUCKERED ANUS
It's me Fuckers | December 3, 2007 at 12:24 pm
It looks like her vag infections have spread to her mouth… can you imagine being the poor bastard who took it from her vag to those lips? *gags* I wonder what HIS lips look like…
needle-dicked nate | December 3, 2007 at 12:24 pm
i bet you there’s no one on the other end of that cell phone.
she’s always holding it to her face, ALWAYS, but she has no friends. STRANGE.
Mr. Truth | December 3, 2007 at 12:30 pm
Holly crap, those things must suck some serious cock!
mixedmartialartvideos.com | December 3, 2007 at 12:35 pm
do the plastic surgery docs have duck billed platypus in their brochures?
SUMMERRAINN | December 3, 2007 at 12:37 pm
I THINK SHE,S CUTE,AND THE GUY IN THE SUV HE IS LOVING IT, YOU CAN TELL, STOP BEING SO ENVIOUS OF PARIS, GET YOURSELFA LIFE, SHAME ON YOU ,
shanipie | December 3, 2007 at 12:37 pm
you guys she so obviously didn’t get her lips injected,
its an allergic reaction to Brits toxic waste dump of a vagina.
I hear the same thing happened to Justin Timberlake and thats why they broke up.
gerard Vandenberg | December 3, 2007 at 12:39 pm
There we have our little disseas-girl!!
You’re seeing LIFE as one big fun-fair. With alot of things it’s quite allright but you simply can’t think and act mature and seriously. You really don’t know a FUCK what is happening in the world today. You are the whole FUCKING day surrounded by YES-MEN and by smiling HAAAAAI-assholes!!
Yep, this is serious varant of HERPUS!!
She sucked a cock from an asshole with HERPUS. This healing-process takes some time so KEEP ON TRUCKING HONEY!!
A stupid woman who burn her ASS must sit on the blisters!!
Shallo Val | December 3, 2007 at 12:43 pm
Wow, it’s not even a joke anymore. These useless, brainless, soulless twats are all in competition with each other and all for what? To see who can snag the most drunk pathetic bastards to swap spit with.
LADIES LEAVE YOUR MOUTH LIPS ALONE!!!!!!!
LayDeeBug | December 3, 2007 at 12:45 pm
Seriously, she looks like she put her mouth on a hot motorcycle tailpipe. What a waste of money and time. Sad thing is, her lips were the best looking part of her.
sweet_cheeks | December 3, 2007 at 12:49 pm
that’s not collagen, she has has a herpes flare up. and if it’s not herpes, her asshole must have run way from her vagina.
i bet brit brit did the injections for paris. she probably used some stuff from under her sink.
IKE | December 3, 2007 at 12:50 pm
She should do something sensible like get a boob job. No one wants to kiss her anyway. :)
Hmm, that wasn’t nice was it.
Ooops.
Tim | December 3, 2007 at 12:51 pm
It’s amusing to watch the bitches and the bitchy-gays rag on a hot girl.
AllyCat | December 3, 2007 at 12:52 pm
This site makes me LOL ~ why is it so great to be the first pathetic poster? seriously, please someone tell me………
Clem | December 3, 2007 at 12:52 pm
She looks like she got punched in the face by a jelly fish.
LayDeeBug | December 3, 2007 at 12:57 pm
TO SUMMER RAIN
#1 learn how to write and spell
#2 get off your parents’ computer and go back to school
#3 you’re probably a pre-pubescent, fat kid with pimples who wishes they looked like anyone except themselves, so Paris is a step up
#4 if I was in front of you, I would so drop kick you in the teeth for having such bad taste. I swear to Dog.
This is so unlike LayDeeBug, but it had to be said.
BaconMessiah | December 3, 2007 at 1:00 pm
I knew her head would someday prolapse.
Ah, Paris taking oral sodomy to a whole new level.
LayDeeBug | December 3, 2007 at 1:01 pm
To TIM 21-
Read #24 and put your name in place of SUMMERRAINS.
lux | December 3, 2007 at 1:04 pm
God, that looks horrible. When will these girls learn and stop doing this to themselves. It reminds me of this time we went camping and a hornet flew into my dad’s soda can, and stung his lip when he took a drink. We laughed at him. People pay for this shit?!!
Spanky | December 3, 2007 at 1:05 pm
“This site makes me LOL ~ why is it so great to be the first pathetic poster? seriously, please someone tell me………”
Easy, cause nobody wants to be #22, which is always occupied by some unfunny fucktard.
Tim | December 3, 2007 at 1:06 pm
To LayDeeBug -
Put in a new tampon. And a little Summer’s Eve (not rain) wouldn’t hurt either.
MMB | December 3, 2007 at 1:07 pm
That Thom Yorke comment was brilliant and DEAD ON!!!
23apples | December 3, 2007 at 1:07 pm
Wow that guy totally hates his life. He looks dumbstruck in the photo where Paris is holding his chin as if she is about to kiss him… but who wouldn’t look that way when a duck-woman is sitting on your lap and is way too close to your face for comfort
Mr Semprini | December 3, 2007 at 1:09 pm
I was asking Paris a question yesterday but I couldn’t understand her because she can only speak French right now. By Friday we’re hoping for Dutch.
my comment | December 3, 2007 at 1:11 pm
Trout pout,
chewed, raggedy chipped nails,
black tights and silver Frankenstein shoes. Total disaster.
El-Coyote | December 3, 2007 at 1:12 pm
Those lips signal a Valtrex moment….
23apples | December 3, 2007 at 1:17 pm
Just look at that vapid stare in picture 3… it’s like she’s a robot
Dee | December 3, 2007 at 1:18 pm
looks like she’s got a couple of earthworms stuck to her mouth
p911gt10c | December 3, 2007 at 1:19 pm
#22. It’s cause there are losers abound on this interweb. But don’t worry, we’re keepin an eye on ‘em and callin it like it we see ‘em.
Tony | December 3, 2007 at 1:19 pm
Her lips look like a puckered hemorrhoid stricken asshole!
The Real Scooby Doo | December 3, 2007 at 1:20 pm
Man, those lips are hideous. But they do remind me of Scooby snacks.
Tiny | December 3, 2007 at 1:21 pm
They’d look just fine wrapped around my johnson.
Sofia | December 3, 2007 at 1:32 pm
How dare you compare Thom Yorke with this ho? He actually got famous by being talented, not opening his legs to everone.
squirlgal1 | December 3, 2007 at 1:33 pm
Oh holy hell. Who tells these women that this is a good look?? Can’t we just drop a bomb on Hollywood and be done with all this nonsense.
Jade | December 3, 2007 at 1:34 pm
she looks like squidworth.
hill | December 3, 2007 at 1:38 pm
what a jackass not to get out of your seat to let the lady out of the car. Jesus, that dude is climing all over her… oh wait, that’s Paris…. nevermind.
RENEE... | December 3, 2007 at 1:38 pm
Eeww, gosh does she look like a tired old whore. And how old is she, like 25? Scary shit man. Britney looks fresh in comparison.
Mr Semprini | December 3, 2007 at 2:00 pm
Man, that is like a Hollywood Oreo – two crusties on the outside and a pale squishy center.
Snarky McComments | December 3, 2007 at 2:07 pm
#14: SUMMERRAINN is your screen name for this site, isn’t it Paris?
Tapeworm | December 3, 2007 at 2:09 pm
What did she just gain like 20 pounds? Her thighs are enormous.
Her face looks like a duck. She’s the laughing stock of Hollywood, and perhaps all of America.
Way to go, cunt!
zsa | December 3, 2007 at 2:21 pm
Is it that the dude wouldn’t get out of the car to let her out like a real gentleman? As for her lips, they definitely look weird, but then when she’s not puckering they look kinda like normal. Hmmm.
=)
Bob White | December 3, 2007 at 2:22 pm
You new system of handling photos sucks. It takes FOREVER to look at a pic and then get back to the next story.