reports that Paris Hilton stopped by a plastic surgeon’s office with her sister Nicky earlier this week to “fix her drooping left eyelid.” Paris allegedly had a surgery six years ago to lift her eyelids but the muscles in her left eye were damaged as a result, “causing it to droop more than the right.” And apparently by wearing blue-tinted contacts over her natural brown eyes she’s making things worse.
“They have been drying out lately,” dished the tipster. “She is ignoring doctors’ orders to not wear her tinted contacts.”
God, that’s a relief. All this time I thought that was Paris Hilton’s idea of looking sexy. Like some sort of seductive wink she read in a dating book. Only instead of a dating book she accidentally grabbed a medical journal with photos of patients with mild retardation. Which, coincidentally, might as well have been a mirror.























Rachel | January 19, 2007 at 12:06 pm
No matter how much surgery she gets, she will always be ugly.
BarbadoSlim | January 19, 2007 at 12:09 pm
Sadly, there’s no cure for her original disease, which is, being, Paris Hilton.
Except, euthanasia
HollyJ | January 19, 2007 at 12:15 pm
Every time I see her my privates quiver in repulsion.
Pointandlaugh | January 19, 2007 at 12:15 pm
she desperately needs a nose job.
I just have NO idea why anyone cares about this whore. So she is rich. Big deal. Why do people fawn over her? What has she ever DONE to merit such celebrity? NOTHING. Just like Za Za Gabor, Carrot Top, & Pauly Shore.
keys open doors | January 19, 2007 at 12:16 pm
and i thought she was perfect
misanthrope | January 19, 2007 at 12:17 pm
Oh, so *that’s* her problem.
amaritimer | January 19, 2007 at 12:25 pm
that’s the cover she is using. She is actually going to have some of the cakey crust chipped off of her cunny.
amaritimer | January 19, 2007 at 12:28 pm
The droopy eye look is a grimace from the chaffing of her crusty cunt. *gotta get that fixed*
gatorbates | January 19, 2007 at 12:35 pm
I bet that’s not the only thing that’s disfigured.
A limerick:
Paris Hilton’s, give it a rest
She opens her cooter to any willing guest
Her eye starts to droop
She thinks about poop
Then shit’s on Kardashians’ chest,
mike hawk | January 19, 2007 at 12:35 pm
my first comment was, – this is the after shot of paris and i doing it. then i remember that she looks like this girl i knew from highschool named cheryl who we used to beer baptise. so never you mind. i’d never hit that twig. York Hawk Smoker
BigJim | January 19, 2007 at 12:40 pm
“mild retardation”?
There is nothing mild about it.
Twisted Humor | January 19, 2007 at 12:46 pm
Clearly, that is Paris’ screw-face. Like Grandma said, “If you keep making that face, it will freeze like that!!!”
And Paris kept on making that face, night after night.
Jenna | January 19, 2007 at 12:47 pm
See boys and girls, this is what happens when you have too much plastic surgery.
pol pot | January 19, 2007 at 12:52 pm
‘Paris Hilton stopped by a plastic surgeon’s office with her sister Nicky’
as Paris left 2 hours later, the receptionist said “So, Nicky, just to confirm, we have you down for January 23…January 31…February 5…February 15…”
rat_whisprrrr | January 19, 2007 at 12:58 pm
If I were her :::thankfully I’m not::: I would get my nasty snatch fixed! <]:)
RichPort | January 19, 2007 at 1:05 pm
Since when is a money shot considered a physical defect?
cole007 | January 19, 2007 at 1:11 pm
I love how trying to fix something that wasn’t broken in the first place at such a young age has caused something much worse in its place.
There IS a God, people. Fo-sho….
cole007 | January 19, 2007 at 1:11 pm
what’s even better is the NYPost headline:
EYE FIX BACKFIRES ON CELEBUTARD
Celebutard… gotta love New York.
Sassy | January 19, 2007 at 1:13 pm
Now if she would only get her overactive vagina fixed, she’d be all set.
Dean | January 19, 2007 at 1:13 pm
I always wondered why she looked high. I mean she’s probably high anyway, but this info helps too.
Lowlands | January 19, 2007 at 1:24 pm
Do you remember that ice-cube what hit her face?Look,it must have hit her eye hard.It’s all blue and closed.Her other eye seems normal as usually.
Giggles | January 19, 2007 at 1:26 pm
Maybe she’s drunk again.
crunt | January 19, 2007 at 1:26 pm
brandon wanted to get her other wonkeye fixed, but the proctologist wasn’t available.
BigJim | January 19, 2007 at 1:26 pm
For the good of humanity, the surgeon should sew her cooter shut.
Oh, who am I kidding? The toxic cooze would eat through the stitches in no time.
That’s why you never see her wearing underwear. She puts them on, but they disolve after just a few minutes.
JungleRed | January 19, 2007 at 1:36 pm
She looks like that banjo-playing, inbred, hillbilly kid from Deliverance.
fearsarewishes | January 19, 2007 at 2:07 pm
#18
Is that true? I guess that I can believe it because I saw some very fucked up headlines on that rag in the 20 years that I lived in NYC.
I remember the very first day I lived there, I was walking on Third Avenue at 43rd Street past one of those news shacks and I saw that paper with a full page photo of a woman falling out of a window of a mid-rise building to her certain death.
The headline in bold 3″ letters screamed:
SPLAT!
At that very moment I realized I was living in the center of the universe.
gout | January 19, 2007 at 2:20 pm
My god, she’ll be so beautiful afterwards! Like a grecian goddess!
We are lucky to be living in these times.
mrs.t | January 19, 2007 at 2:28 pm
Wonkavision.
ponk | January 19, 2007 at 2:54 pm
kids, if you’re gonna take the money shot, make sure it’s real spooge and not crazy glue.
spunkbubble on J.alba's face | January 19, 2007 at 3:33 pm
I swear to god i would love to punch this cunt in her face.
Jenna | January 19, 2007 at 3:36 pm
Further proof that Paris is a retard:
http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/archives/005276.html
Can somebody tell me what was so wrong with her face that she needed all this plastic surgery? And why in God’s name did she, her sister, and her mom all go to the same plastic surgeon that gave them all the same fucked-up nose?
wedgeone | January 19, 2007 at 3:55 pm
#28 – That’s “Wonk-Eye-Vision”. WEV for short.
#18 – Gotta love the Post, if that is, in fact, a true headline. Sign me up for a year’s subscription.
Guess we all know what she’s going to do with the million from the Vienna Opera Dance.
She’s just so easy to crack wise about. I’ve been laughing at most every comment posted on this article. >^D
supanigga | January 19, 2007 at 3:56 pm
you can’t fix that horner’s syndrome.
diarrhea riot | January 19, 2007 at 3:59 pm
She caught the dreaded “piss-eye” from Kim Kardashian.
A.V Phibes | January 19, 2007 at 4:04 pm
She looks like Owen Wilson in Drag.
cherie | January 19, 2007 at 5:04 pm
No wonder she looks like she’s half asleep all the damn time.
TJH | January 19, 2007 at 6:28 pm
If it weren’t for her daddy’s money she’d be working the counter at Jack-In-The-Box.
NicotineEyePatch | January 19, 2007 at 8:11 pm
The Vulcan ear really highlights the wonkeye. Probably not intentional though.
gossipmonger | January 19, 2007 at 10:36 pm
Regarding the comments of Mr. “Mike Hawk”-you my
friend are a complete and utter moron who came to
this sight by some cosmic error.
You need to try misogynistassholes.com where you’ll find more “people” who will appreciate your droll and amusing anecdotes.
MrSemprini | January 20, 2007 at 2:42 am
#4, please don’t lump Carrot Top in with those losers. He really is a talented soul.
Googolygoo | January 20, 2007 at 5:40 am
Oh yes, MrSemprini, I, too have always enjoyed Carrot Top’s joke. Talk about a plastic surgery victim AND a steroid abuser, thus the Frankencranium he’s developed.
RichPort | January 20, 2007 at 7:28 am
16. … I take money shots all the time, and I resent the implication that somehow makes me less of a man.
ToiletDuck | January 20, 2007 at 9:09 am
#42…
Rich, I think I love you…
ToiletDuck | January 20, 2007 at 9:10 am
I think either Paris’ tiara is set the wrong way, or she has had plastic surgery…
I can see this vain little cunt in 20 years with so many plastic surgeries that her navel will be on her chin…
drdisaia | January 20, 2007 at 9:52 am
Correction of eyelid deformities can be hard. Is she improved after her last operation? If she is going for a repair after already having had surgery, she should go to a good surgeon. She can afford it.
Dry eyes and contacts go together, but that usually only causes discomfort.
RichPort | January 20, 2007 at 10:26 am
45. Doc, I’m experiencing significant rectal pain, with some bloody stool, but I can’t figure out what’s causing it.
I’ve cut back on the butt sex, and sometimes, I’m even using lube. I just don’t get it, …
sarah | January 20, 2007 at 10:58 am
you guys are so fucking ridiculous. someone just took a picture of her while she was blinking, its not a “droopy” eyelid!
get a life.
Ems is da Shizz | January 20, 2007 at 1:48 pm
thats the face she makes when she’s having an orgasm
Lowlands | January 20, 2007 at 2:51 pm
Is there a videotape available from this photo??
LEATHERFACE45 | January 20, 2007 at 4:10 pm
WHY DOESNT SHE JUST GET HOGTIED, BALLGAGGED AND SPANKED WITH A PING PONG PADDLE WITH TACKS IN IT………THAT WOULD BE FUN