Paris Hilton gets pwned by Sarah Silverman

June 4th, 2007 // 380 Comments

superficial

  1. Cleaniac

    I’m not jealous of someone who has herpes. Period.

  2. Man, I have admit, Sarah makes my penis rise. It’s just something about that jet-black hair, brown eyes, firm body, and the potty-mouth… Mmmmm, yummy… And then I think about her and Jimmy Kimmel and it all shrivels up in disgust. Oh well, I’d still have at it if given the opportunity.

    And no, I don’t feel bad for skank. Her and her little network of sleaze deserve all the humiliation they can get. Christ it’s so annoying constanly hearing about these crack-ho’s!

  3. SM@SH!

    Yo can bas mouth Paris Hilton all you want, but i’ll be damned if I’ll sit quietly by and listen to all you pampered, ineffectual, over-supervised emo fucks bad mouth the time honored tradition of drunk driving. Drunk driving is not a crime, it is a sport, a calling, and for some, like myself, a way of life. If you haven’t ever been drunk driving then you, quite simply, do not drink nearly enough; and for that, I am truly sorry.

    Drunk driving, like any other worthwhile skill, can be developed and honed nearly endlessly. I have been drunk driving literally tens of thousands of times and I feel as if I have only scratched the surface of the possibilities of this magnificent art form. Yet, in all my practice sessions, I have yet to get pulled over even once and have never hit anyone or wrecked a vehicle. How is this possible if drunk driving is the horrible scourge that all of you have been told it is? Quite simply my mush brained friend…you have been LIED to. Drunk driving is a fine and noble undertaking and well worth your time and effort to master. Drink my friends drink like it’s your last day on earth and then, when you are good and drunk, get in your effing car and drive!

  4. Yourfairytale

    Who the hell are all these morons defending Paris? Shut the fuck up! Paris isn’t even a person so how are we enjoying a person’s misery? Fuck Paris. She is FINALLY getting what she deserves. I wish that bitch had broken down and cried and then everyone had thrown trash at her. When will she realize the world hates her stinking guts? Thank god for Sarah Silverman!

  5. julius

    Jessica #132! you again! shut the fuck up you dumb fat bitch, go to a paris fan site, and get the fuck out of this forum this is a nota fan site, but then again your stupid redneck ass probably didnt know the difference.

  6. EMILIO

    hahahahaha poor paris :):(

  7. Jen

    Sarah Silverman is an ugly jew bitch. What a cheap shot. Very unimanginative Sarah Silverjew.

  8. EsteeFlwrPot

    Um I think everybody forgets that this is the same girl that badmouths and hates Jews, Hispanics, Blacks, asians, etc. and doesn’t mind letting the rest of the world know. The same girl that treats the rest of the world like shit because she thinks shes better. Everyone forgets that and when shit like this happens all of a sudden its “why are they so mean to paris?” why dont you look back and find out instead of flap your gums like the dumbass you are

  9. zzz

    SHE DESERVES A PUNISHMENT!!!!! BUT THAT JOKE WAS SOOOOOOOOOOO MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  10. Macks

    Those who make fun of Paris because she was maybe going to cry are morons. I don’t know much people who wouldn’t feel bad if a room full of loosers who worth like 10$ were laughing at him or her. C’mon maybe Paris is stupid but humiliating her in front of tones of people is the lowest thing you can do to someone…

  11. LOVED it! i laughed so hard that i almost wet myself!

  12. Ana Rita

    Perhaps Paris is not the best person in the world (YES, SHE ISN’T) but, in my opinion, that situation is not desirable for anyone even being Paris Hilton, she has no fault of being rich and a big child, probably her parents are not feeling guilty, but they must to.

    Sarah Silverman didn’t say anything that everyone around here didn’t know before. I think that you’ll be more comic if nono had laugh. xD

    I don’t like Paris, but that moment may be the worst of her life. Poor Little Girl.

  13. Lowlands

    Just throw that Sarah silverman bitch in the jail and let her have a gasshower…Oh,now it’s suddenly not funny anymore?Why’s that?

  14. Ana Rita

    a mistake:
    *if no one had laugh

  15. Whammer Jammer

    You morons defending this skank are just like all the Michael Jackson supporters: STUPID!!

    The skank needed this to show her what people truly think of her. The one and only thing wrong with this is that it didn’t happen a lot sooner.

  16. HonestAbe

    I thought the clip was really funny, but when I read some of the comments (especially #157, #45, and #109) I found out that Sarah Silverman is jewish! Now I don’t know what to think. I mean, I thought she was funny at first, but now that I know she’s jewish I feel more like vomiting rather than laughing. Thank God for people like Jen, Dirty Sanchez, and Dianne who are brave enough to do their civic duty and publicly out these heebs on an internet message board. If it wasn’t for them, or people like them, I very well could have lived my life completely unaware of Sarah Silverman’s jewry. You guys are the real American heroes, and I look forward to finding out how many other jew rats there are in Hollywood through your future posts.

  17. Aeva

    HAHAHAHAHAH YAAAAAAAAAAAAY.

  18. bedbugsandballyhoo

    I hope Parasite is paying you guys overtime for this. You sure do provide us with a lot of comic relief with your “poor little Paris, mean ole’ Sarah” diatribes.
    I heard they just made a revision to Webster’s…if you look up the word hypocrite, there’s a picture of a bald-headed, wonky eyed, brown-eyed girl in an orange jumpsuit and flip-flops.

  19. Vi

    I’m not much of a fan of either Paris or Sarah, but please stop with the jew jokes.

    You fucking SOUND like Paris Hilton–just as trashy. Not funny or clever at all.

  20. Vi

    I’m not much of a fan of either Paris or Sarah, but please stop with the jew jokes.

    You fucking SOUND like Paris Hilton–just as trashy. Not funny or clever at all.

  21. Vi

    sorry for the double post. but I mean it.

  22. Ben

    #157, Jen: “Sarah Silverman is an ugly jew bitch. What a cheap shot. Very unimanginative Sarah Silverjew.”

    Well, you sure showed her how to be creative and imaginative. What are you, a gradeschooler?

  23. Aeva

    I think it should be noted that everytime someone makes fun of Paris Hilton, a kitten gets its wings.

  24. Harvey Keitel

    Sarah isn’t even telling a joke here. Nobody gave a shit about this stupid ugly bitch before her crappy sex video circulated. It wasn’t even a good porno. It’s all blurry, her fruitty boyfriend is really fucking annoying, and Paris is not much to look at. At least the Pam Anderson video was worthy of jerking off to. Half of you posters are obviously not regulars. This is a site for people who hate Hollywood, and Paris is the epitome of that hatred. She’s as classy as a chav. This is just awesome coming from Silverman, a female comedian who is actually funny, and good looking without makeup and photoshop.

  25. C

    I wonder if Paris go lick-a-de-split in prison, yet?
    Or better yet, do you suppose is the licker or the lickee?
    Gov.

  26. Sheva

    Paris is rightly slammed for her blatant violations of the law and is in jail now so justice in a way is being served but I do have some qualms with it.

    Who is this yenta to attack her for giving blowjobs? Like it’s a bad thing. Blowjobs are a good thing. And even if Paris isn’t that good at it and doesn’t finish the job properly at least she’s trying to make people happy.

    And I always support those that try to make the world a a happier place.

    So you just keep on blowing Paris.

  27. Aeva

    I don’t think what Paris does with her mouth to a man’s penis could technically be called a blow-job. More like oral herpes transfer.

  28. Jessica

    #155 I’ve never posted on this site before, you must have a different Jessica. Honestly. I’m just standing up for what I believe in. Yes she should be punished for what she did, definately. But it’s just not nice for anyone, and I mean ANYONE who is in that situation to get the piss taken out of them on TV. That’s just not right.

  29. wedgeone

    #14 – Why do you think MTV even invited her? Because she’s a recording artist? Don’t kid yourself. She was there to be a target, & she swallowed that hook so deep into her gullet that it’s currently being removed by her Butch roomie at Lynwood!
    #22 – Olga, it’s called SCRIPT WRITING. Do you really think that Sarah made that up on the fly? Take you sanctimonious self back to English class & learn to spell the words accurately before you come back.
    #42 – You sure you’re real name isn’t Edna?
    #99 – go to urbandictionary.com and look up pwned. They will tell you where the phrase originated.
    While you’re there, go & vote a thumbs up to the definition that I recently posted about Paris Hilton: HEIRHEAD!
    Good riddence to her – finally some relief from Paris & Lohan for a few days. Bring on some new articles – and NOT ones about Britney.

  30. Aeva

    178–it may be wrong, but it feels so right.

  31. FOR ALL THE PARIS HATERS, SUCK BALLS, COW BALLS! DON’T HATER BECAUSE YOUR POOR!

  32. Aeva

    181–

    Ooh! Can I hate her because she’s a waste of space and a smudge on humanity? Because she’s a black hole of goodness and a seedy tramp? Because the only reason she can’t actually be called a real whore is because Daddy’s money is her real profit? THERE ARE SO MANY CHOICES!

  33. freakoid

    you know, ridiculing someone’s behavior (like Paris) is completely different and much funnier than ridiculing someone’s heritage (Sarah is jewish)

  34. Melissa

    this is just the most hilarious thing i have seen ever.

  35. Nate

    Why is Sarah Silverman being vilified?? Apparently, those bashing her don’t bother to watch Letterman and Conan who make jokes at her expense. So those guys aren’t funny? (Or for the anti-Semites, are they funny because they’re not Jewish?)

    Paris can claim to be taking responsibility after she attempted to weasel her way out of jail by starting a pathetic petition for clemency from the governor. Way to own up to your actions.

    Furthermore, she didn’t have to show up to the Awards. Anybody who’s been watching them for the last 15 years knows that the humor can get cheap at the expense of those in the audience. She opened herself up to this by freely choosing to attend.

    I thought the joke was hilarious, as was Jack’s reaction. And for those who like to say that the rest of us who feel no sympathy for her are jealous, sure, I’m poorer than Paris. But I do have a Master’s degree and will be working on a second one this fall. If you think I’m jealous because I don’t have her money, you’re as fucking retarded as she is. And please join the real world.

  36. wedgeone

    #117 – OK, posting that comment under THAT name is fucking hilarious. LMFAO!

    #132 – Paris didn’t “admitted to her wrong doing” until after the judge told her to piss off & sentenced her to 45 days, and she found out that she couldn’t buy or fuck her way out of it. Paris tried to blame her publicist for giving her incorrect information, remember? That’s when she fired him, then rehired him two days later? As far as Naomi, LiLo, and Pete, Get your fuckin’ facts straight about those who post on this site! We rail those two bit whores and strung out wastes daily!!!

  37. Paris’ look was like ‘Eat shit and die. But wait until after the show when I show you how a rich princess will kick a crude-lame-unamusing-bitch’s ass.’
    I love Paris.
    Her looked burned through Sarah.

    …Michael.

  38. cinnarose

    I almost felt bad for her, then I remembered this is Paris Hilton and she obviously has no shame, so then I laughed. Twenty-three days in jail is not long enough!

  39. Meatus

    I love how all of these dumbasses feel so bad for little Paris. If you heard of some schmo on local tv getting busted for multiple DUIs like this bitch, you’d be calling for his head on a pike, but since it’s a talentless millionaire dropout whom you’ll never meet and has done nothing to improve your or anybody else’s life, you take pity.

    Why was she at the awards? Had to fit in one last appearance and party before turning herself in to the authorities? How many people have had that luxury?

    BTW, it’s not like a real prison, it’s jail. It sounds more like she’s being sent to her room than doing time.

    I’m waiting for the televised shanking.

  40. Sheva

    Hey Mr. Johnson, well the show ended and Paris’ retort was to go directly to jail and have her PR person express humility for her stupidity behind the wheel.

    But as for her whoreness, yeah she’s great.

  41. Meatus

    I love how all of these dumbasses feel so bad for little Paris. If you heard of some schmo on local tv getting busted for multiple DUIs like this bitch, you’d be calling for his head on a pike, but since it’s a talentless millionaire dropout whom you’ll never meet and has done nothing to improve your or anybody else’s life, you take pity.

    Why was she at the awards? Had to fit in one last appearance and party before turning herself in to the authorities? How many people have had that luxury?

    BTW, it’s not like a real prison, it’s jail. It sounds more like she’s being sent to her room than doing time.

    I’m waiting for the televised shanking.

  42. Sheva

    Hey Mr. Johnson, well the show ended and Paris’ retort was to go directly to jail and have her PR person express humility for her stupidity behind the wheel.

    But as for her whoreness, yeah she’s great.

  43. WHAT EVER

    To all of you thinking it’s sooooo wrong because Paris was humiliated…

    She laughed her ass off during the FIRECROTCH episode, totally humiliating Lindsey Lohan..Paris was laughing so much she sounded like a cackleing witch..

    not to mention all the relationships she has had a hand into breaking up…all while she’s laughing about it.

    That Bitch Paris deserves every nano second of humiliation that she feels..PERIOD!

  44. Michael Johnston

    I’d love to see a porn of Paris fucking herself up the ass with a KFC drumstick. Or would I love to feel her fucking me up the ass with a KFC drumstick? Decisions, decisions.

  45. HoLy

    This is totally not funny!!!
    Seriously, she is in the place…you must be a little bit respectful !
    She did nothing wrong to the rest of the world, except being herself and according to me, it is not a good reason. I’m not telling you this because i love Paris Hilton but because it was too much!! I feel sad for her!

  46. JEW AND PROUD

    109 + 166 YOU MAKE ME PHYSICALLY SICK YOU ANTI-SEMITIC PIGS HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!

  47. me

    #163 go to hell

    I hope someone throws you or your lowlife family in a gas shower for raising you to be such a waste of life

  48. Sarah Silverman, I don’t know who you are, but after seeing this I so fucking want you to be my wife!

  49. me

    you people are so sick and disgusting you should all be ashamed of yourselves. This goes farther than paris hilton this is the type of ignorance and bigotry that will never make the world change for the better. I hope one day the tables turn on you. Karmas a bitch and youll deserve every bit of it

  50. Josh_Spain

    Poor Paris,… she is amazing!

    Sarah, eres una pu*a bollera reprimida!

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