Paris Hilton got trashed last night and decided to regale patrons at The Estate in Boston with a rendition of her song “Stars are Blind.” Except as soon as Paris got on stage she had a “wardrobe malfunction” and showed the crowd some boob. So these poor people not only had to see Paris’ tits but then had to listen to her sing? Jesus. I’d ask for my money back. Or pull my classic hop over the bar and empty the cash register maneuver. Although it’s not very effective. But one time I actually pushed a button before the bartender threw a beer stein at my melon. I no longer have night vision.
Photos: INFdaily.com
check out the funbags on that hose hound
Disclaimer: Boston does not claim responsibility for Paris’ actions and is pretty sure she is the reason we lost the Superbowl. We are also trying to prove the fact that 1 out of every 4 americans has herpes rate is soley because of Paris Hilton. I for one think she should be banned from the city as her very presence there could infect everyone with the clap.
Everybody’s smiling; they’re having a good time, smiling; some of them are laughing at Paris Hilton, most of them are too preoccupied with their genitals to laugh at anything. The music is so loud that people scream and lean in to one another to communicate.
A handful of girls, and faggots, are jealous of Paris. They don’t understand what makes her so special. They say things to themselves like, ‘Why do people think she’s so pretty? She’s not pretty’, followed by the inevitable, ‘I’m prettier than she is’. Arms are beginning to cross.
The atmosphere is horrible: it’s loud, and the people are screaming, and the music is loud; people are watching Paris half-sing, and the music is getting louder and then out of the indecipherable din, comes.. this sound?
The sound is a hellish bending, twisting groan. Like someone’s being swallowed by the mouth of hell. Something’s not right but no one seems to notice and they continue to dry-hump everything in sight. All of the sudden, like a slab of concrete, an eighty pound light fixture heaves from the ceiling and falls directly on to back of Paris’s neck, and head.
The music grinds to a halt. Eeeaarugghchruch! People are stunned: the erections start to subside; the girl’s vaginas begin to dry up and de-lengthen. In unison, everyone breaks in to spontaneous applause. The DJ removes Paris’s CD from the player, holds it emphatically in front of the crowd, and breaks it in to three pieces. The crowd’s palms are bleeding at this point. Guys are high-fiving.
The DJ tosses the broken CD in to the trash. He smiles, flashing a lone, gold capped incisor, puts some trashy Annie Lennox ‘Sweet Dreams’ remix in to the player, and the crowd starts to grind, and grind, and pump, and grind. No one notices Paris lying, smashed, beneath eighty pounds of burning lighting equipment.
That 80 pound light fixture from Acme actually works.
Someone should have stolen her watch. You could feed the state of NJ with with it.
Apparently the lisping dudes hate her but I’m a straight guy so she looks ok to me.
stop tanning!!!
“I want to shhhing you a shhhong about where everybodysh knowsh yoursh namesh *huuurrrgh barf*” – Paris
“Shut up, hooker! Boosh!” – Xander Crews
Always thought Paris was pretty smoking, wonky eye and all. But since she got the herps her stock tanked. Any thoughts of banging her are now replaced by only sucking on her tits and busting a nut on them. That’s safe sex.
PS: No coochie or mouth action for Paris ever!
Hahahahahahaha!!! Fags and bitter cunts on this site always bash Amy Winehouse as untalented. You know how I know you’re a loser? Here’s who you called untalented:
2008 Grammy Awards:
Song of the Year: “Rehab,” Amy Winehouse
New Artist: Amy Winehouse.
Pop Vocal Album: “Back to Black,” Amy Winehouse.
Female Pop Vocal Performance: “Rehab,” Amy Winehouse.
Those awards will look great on her tombstone.
Ok, Dad…
I am out of alcohol :(
I dont get what is around her neck..it looks like something from a graduation ceremony
Try rubbing alcohol – some people say the initial hit is similar to heroin.
why paris seems not using her mind,. She’s so beautiful yet stupid
Come on #115, please let me write my own shit.
i just wanted to say. i was there last night. and she was totally shit-canned. haha it was great! i love her. i almost died when she walked in the door!
Did you notice?
Her fingers are looking quite similar with her TOES!!
Great… I see the tops of her nipples… and now I never wanna suck a tit again…
I have AIDS.
Why are her knuckles all raw and bloody?
#110? Yeah, good buddy. Judging talent by what the people at The Grammies — I’m renaming the Grammies, ‘Diapers’; because what they’re holding, all those peoples’ own shit — say is, well, hey, that’s fantastic, Petry dish.
One little tidbit of information that I accepted, that I honored, that I embraced in to my life lastnight is that winning a Grammy is at the top of the list of to-do things on every black performers agenda. Why do you ask? Think about it: Grammies are shiny. What negro isn’t stupified by shiny things? Exactly. Just like chimpanzees.
Also, I understand that Kanye West is going to dip his Diapers in chrome and lay them on ‘he’ momma’s grave. ‘Dese’s fo’ yo’, mommy. Dese’s . . . (litany of funny sounding sobs) . . . yo’.’
“almost died when she walked in the door”
Her STD’s are really that bad, huh?
#123 – You’re Black, aren’t you?
The reigning slut of the world just “hates” it, I mean LOVES it when she flashes some skin and gets extra attention. Add attention whore to the list.
It’s probably all been said before.
I suppose that’s a better headline than the usual “drunkenly sucks cock in LA”
#15. Just my dick, Rich.
I will send you $money$ if you don’t post about her anymore.
since britney has taken over the tabloids headlines n first pages lately n since nicole n lindsay are trying (apparently) to call it quits nowadays also since reality has given paris the perfect slap on the face with her being broke as her grandpa decided out of the blues not to give the family anything from his money so her manager was like “listen you are going to be history soon so you’d better start doing something (either stupid or nasty) to make to headlines and quick” so she decided to get drunk and sing a very awful song and show the world her boobs so all we have to do is sit back and see who’s gonna make it first page paris or britney. I’d say britney would surely make it since paris to clean to even make to the last page (hehehehe).
I’m so glad this stupid cunt never made it to Rwanda on Americas behalf
Ok, so it says her tits fell out. So, why don’t we have a pic of that? I think she’s hot.
paris hilton es en realidad una buena chica por que si fuera yo hace tiempo los hubiera mandado a volar a esos paparazzzi!!! invaden su vida … ademas creo q es buena … y le sonrie a la vida a todo tropiezo q tenga ….. eres muy linda y quisiera ser como tu paris !!! eres mi idolo … y q se vayan a la m……… todos los q estan invidiosos por no tener lo q tu tienes !!!!!!!!!!!! no les hagas caso a las tonterias q hablan de ti !!!!
This bitch deserves no more than 30,000/year.
Good for her Grandpa, giving away 97% of his money to charities.
oh dude paris again!?!?!
its like the slut wants her family name disgraced over and over. feel sorry 4 her father 2 be honest. if i had a dollar 4 every time paris got drunk and fucked up like now, id be a zillionaire. and id give every dime 2 charity, just like her granfather, such a good man
This bitch has no talent ,just a name behind her .No wonder why her grandfather wont leave her shit ,shes a disgrace to her family name.
Ain’t no way i would come out of that without a headache, deaf or blind. She really freaks me out. I wouldn’t go near her with a 5 foot pole.
#14 just owned this entire message board. hahahaha
Paris Hilton? Bad girl? I saw her profile with sexy photos on Richsoulmate.co m, where celebrities and wealthy singles hook up. She feels lonely, doesn’t she? Is she looking for a serious relationship or just for fun?
Paris Hilton is dissolute, still hunting young sexy men on Richsoulmate.c om.
How stupid…wadde f*ck
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That’s too low!
cool
cool
i like so much
i like so much