Paris & Doug still beating the shit out of each other

Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt reportedly got into another drunken brawl this morning, according to TMZ:

Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt got into an epic fight early this morning … so much so the LAPD responded to a call — “Drunk people arguing” — this, according to law enforcement sources.
It happened a few hours ago in the Hollywood Hills. An eyewitness tells us he saw Paris in her driveway and Doug getting in his car, when Paris began screaming, “Don’t go, don’t go!”
The eyewitness tells us Doug got out of the car and the lovebirds began “shoving each other.”

Sonofabitch. How many times do I have to explain to Doug Reinhardt he won’t go to jail for murdering Paris in a “crime of passion?” No, really, I dare you to find one person who’d convict him let alone an entire jury. It’s the greatest legal loophole known to man.