Paris Hilton and Shanna Moakler both filed police reports this morning alleging they were attacked. Paris claims Moakler punched her in the jaw and Moakler claims Paris’s ex Stavros Niarchos poured a drink over her head and shoved her down some stairs. So basically today is the best day ever. The incident happened at Hyde at around 1:10 AM when Shanna confronted Paris and started screaming obscenities, at one point punching her in the jaw with a closed fist. The bad blood is the result of Paris getting it on with Shanna’s estranged husband Travis Barker, and a source close to Paris reveals that Shanna has been leaving “menacing” messages on Paris’s answering machine.
I don’t normally pick sides when it comes to catfights – I usually just pour some jello or mud on the contestants – but in this case I’m going to have to side with Stavros Niarchos. Pouring drinks on her head and pushing her down the stairs? All he needs to add to his repertoire is pinching her arm and accusing her of having cooties and he’ll be the oldest 4th grader in town. Classiest too. And as for Shanna herself? Well for now we’ll just refer to her as Superman, because punching Paris Hilton in the face is right up there with pulling babies from burning buildings and fighting terrorists.
Some more shots of Paris and Shanna at Hyde after the jump.
Man…I have to say is EFF PARIS HILTON! EFF HER! I’m glad she got sucker punched…maybe she’ll quit galavanting around Hollywood like she’s the second coming of Christ! The only thing is Shayna made herself look bad by even being at the club at 1am. She just supported her estranged husbands accusations of being out all night partying and not being a mother to their kids. Oh well…
Brain Embolism, are you THE Walrus? The one who does Zipperfish, with the immortal Reginold?
@42
Thanks. Wonder what she looks like now? It would be funny to see her with a “pirate patch” to cover the bruise. Arrrrgh, matey!
Lucky Shanna Moakler–doing what the rest of us can only dream of!
http://glossedover.com
#40
hey rose!!!!
have’nt been here myself due to ass-wipes beyond my control…
i bet u could beat-down both those bitches…and i’d pay for the pics…
YAY for Shanna!!!
woot!!!
I don’t get why people always forget the last step: LIGHT IT UP. When you pour your (hopefully extremely flammable) drink on somebody, you’re supposed to set them on fire! See, that’s the kicker. Piss them off, then send them screaming towards the closest source of water. You could always offer to urinate on the flames to put it out afterwards.
” And as for Shanna herself? Well for now we’ll just refer to her as Superman, because punching Paris Hilton in the face is right up there with pulling babies from burning buildings and fighting terrorists.”
Quote of a lifetime.
TEAM MOAKLER
TCLTC
I wish that SM had punched her in the right eye and knocked that one wonky, too.
#55
Hi ptprez!
@ #34, pinkynip: that is the most wonderful sentence I have ever read on this site.
I dunno – I’m looking at Shanna walking out – and that dumb blonde hair doesn’t look like a drink was “poured over her head” – nor does that ugly denim covering look like it was dragged down some stairs. On the other hand – Paris looks no worse for the wear (no worse than her usual drunken whorish self).
Team Shanna all the way!
I can’t believe anyone would fight over that junkie. Sex with him would be like fucking a tattooed Q-Tip dipped in herpes.
52 InstantAsshat-AddFame –
No!!!
@63 FagMags – Maybe the Superfish used old pics??
P.S. Click the link, it may be right up your alley.
Fighting over Travis is just disgusting. He’s just proof that Paris Hilton will fuck just about anyone. What ever happened to her saying “no” to sex for a year. They both need to get punched in the face for touching Travis. He looks like he has every STD known to science.
@31…So just because Travis says Shanna cheated on him, that’s what happened? I really somehow doubt that’s what happened. Travis seems like the kind of piece of shit who would make her look bad just to take the blame away from himself. I rarely watch mtv, but I do remember seeing a couple of episodes of their show and Shanna seeming to obsess over the thought of Travis cheating on her.
I agree with 68…Travis is definitely not worth fighting over. He dumped his high school sweetheart for Shanna, the Playboy model, and now he’s moving down the chain to Paris. And he’s not even that great a drummer.
Actually, this is just the second-best day ever. The first will be the eventual “kiss and make up” video.
http://www.reidaboutit.com
The only way he could be a worse drummer would be a complete absence of limbs. And why does he ALWAYS have that bizarre dragqueen expression on his face-with the pursed lips and one eyebrow raised?
I want this video!
http://www.AlternativeAddiction.com
@ number 44, thats just wrong and disgusting…good job :)
On as serious a note as possible: It’s pretty sad when someone gets punched and the whole internet applauds. That should be a sign that the whole ‘celebrity gossip’ thing is getting out of hand. I recommend Paris take a couple months off.
Back on topic This is the best day ever. The only thing better than Paris getting punched by another skank would be Paris getting vag-punched by a midget skank.
I would punch her in the face, too, if I was trying to get back together with the father of my children and this biatch was getting in the way. I wish Shanna had gotten her better, I don’t see any evidence in Paris’ face.
Elliott Mintz is such a knave. I mean, really, a tool.
Did anyone watch Meet the Barkers?! Shanna is a LAZY be-OTCH! Shanna prolly made some comment about hating Paris (while her and Travis were together) and he thought it would be a nice way to piss Shanna off and catch a wonderful new STD.
I agree that Shanna didn’t hit paris hard enough. But maybe she didn’t want to break skin and run the chance of catching something herself.
team paris all the way!
Team Shanna…. Paris needs to stick to Ugly Foreign Heirs…. Travis is not divorced yet. A little respect to the wife should be had.
Well, last night sure was a monumental night..but I agree that the bitch has long deserved a serious beat down…but who wants all those diseases jumping off. Kudos for her for even being willing to have her skin came close to that skank. God, I wish I could “accidentally” run into that ho Parasite…and have my way..but we can always dream…right???
I’m surprised that Shanna could wake up long enough to go out and punch Paris. Now her arm will probably rot off. And, wasn’t the rumor that she was fucking around on Travis, so really she should be pleased that he will soon be infested with the Herp.
Still, I’d bang Paris in the ass, serve her teabags, and give her the Golden Shower Award.
That Paris is a real floozy. Maybe she is the father/mother of Ana Nicole Smith’s baby. Who haven’t those 2 trollps slept with?
Hahahahahaha,damn I wish there was video for this!
That guy deserves a good swift kick where his nuts used to be,what a pussy.
Parasite has a habit of getting hit by angry ex wives…didn’t Shannon Doherty also give the slut a smack once or twice before? Hey Shannon and Shanna should get together and tag team her…throw in Nick Carter and we’ve got a bitch fight of the century.
You know the fight part is great and all, but what i still can’t figure out is all these losers that bang that pig Paris and sport her in public, all proud of the fact. How can you walk into a room where 90% of the people have fucked your date? Would’nt you feel like a loser? They used to say ‘sloppy seconds’. Now they have to say ‘sloppy thousandths’. The only thing i would do to that walking sewer is lay a lincoln log on her forehead and wash it off with a hot piss.
I would love to see Paris with a broken jaw and her mouth wired shut
Go Shanna!!!
is she fucking her publicist?
I’m with you #2. I’d give Paris more than that, for all the pain she’s caused other people. She’s a loser and can’t stand anyone else to be in the spotlight. She’s a disgrace to Conrad Hilton, I bet the man is turning in his grave, poor guy!
Paris Hilton is the most disgusting and overrated personality on this planet. She needs to get over herself and before claiming ‘I’m so beautiful’ she really needs to look in the mirror in bright daylight and tate a good look at herself, that’s if she can get passed that huge, ugly nose on her face…….haha!
wow, i would have loved to see a video of that