A rep for E! has confirmed that Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton are going to be counseling overweight campers on the new season of The Simple Life.
“They are going to be camp counselors at one camp in the Southern California Mountains,” says an E! spokesperson. “The camp has five different themes. Each week will be a different theme. And yes, one week is a weight loss/fitness camp. It’s not a fat camp.”
Because, really, who better to guide the fate of fat children than Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie. They’re gonna spend the whole time pointing and laughing and going, “Jesus, they’re so fat!” And then Nicole Richie will say, “Oh my God, Paris, they can hear you.” And then they’ll laugh some more and Paris will laugh so hard she’ll let out a little fart. And maybe a little poo will come out. Just a little. Because she’s classy.
Schnuggie | March 16, 2007 at 3:06 pm
I don’t get it. What do these two fat asses know about dieting???
Kate | March 16, 2007 at 3:10 pm
What’s the problem with these two counseling overweight people? I mean, they’re OBVIOUSLY super healthy themselves, what with the DUIs, drug use, STDs, and eating disorders…okay, I see the problem now. Good choice, E! Network.
ponk | March 16, 2007 at 3:11 pm
like fat kids don’t already have enough problems…. jeeeeeezuz.
rrd | March 16, 2007 at 3:12 pm
They are going to teach them how to puke!
Ok…take this finger…no, no THIS finger…yea. Now stick it way down, no, wait! lean over. yes, like that. Wait. want another doughnut first?
Donkey | March 16, 2007 at 3:13 pm
and people (sheeple) will still watch it.
Donkey | March 16, 2007 at 3:14 pm
look it’s Paris Hilton and her midget twin.
stevob2006 | March 16, 2007 at 3:14 pm
So
HerpesHilton | March 16, 2007 at 3:17 pm
I can’t wait to see the kids faces when Paris starts talking about one of the hazards of being skinny and pretty is getting ‘itchy’ down there.
Superevil | March 16, 2007 at 3:26 pm
I hope they get eaten.
freak_show | March 16, 2007 at 3:26 pm
They will sit around for the entire episode saying “Like, don’t eat so much because I don’t and I look like this (picture Paris w/ her little coy curtsy).” Nicole will say, “Yeah, and learn how to throw up, that’s what I do.” Then, they will all have the fat people skip out on the town wearing their clothing (or trying to do so). They’ll all go to the local 7-11 where Paris and Nicole have the pigs buy all the Ben and Jerry’s. They’ll go back to camp, wash it all down w/ Kool-aid and Oreos and then they will all puke and take laxatives together!
No, wait, that’s what my friends all do.
Hollywood headache | March 16, 2007 at 3:26 pm
The only person that they should council is the first person they see when they look in the mirror. I mean honestly how could the two dumbest people in the world teach you something about your self????????
hollywoodheadache.com
mrs.t | March 16, 2007 at 3:27 pm
It will be exactly like the episode of The Simple Life when they worked on that farm with the cows. Nicole will agree to be the one who has to, like, touch the fat people then she will chase Paris with her contaminated hand while Paris screams “Eeeeewwwwww, you bitch!”
Those are some kind of lucky fat kids.
Lowlands | March 16, 2007 at 3:28 pm
Looking at these girls the fat kids will get hungry and run to the nearest Burgerking.
schack | March 16, 2007 at 3:30 pm
#9…hysterical
schack | March 16, 2007 at 3:31 pm
i bet you’re turkish, lowlands.
Lowlands | March 16, 2007 at 3:32 pm
Paris Hilton can show them her video and explain them how to exercise to get the fat burned away.
Donkey | March 16, 2007 at 3:32 pm
Why don’t they put these two in a room together with a story line something like the first “Saw” movie.
Now that’s a reality show I could watch!
schack | March 16, 2007 at 3:33 pm
i mean, in the end, none of it matters. but in the meantime, a show like this is really nauseatingly cruel.
Lowlands | March 16, 2007 at 3:39 pm
#15)Allright i’ll take your bet.How much do we bet?
schack | March 16, 2007 at 3:41 pm
how are we gonna settle the bet? you’ll just lie to me
Lowlands | March 16, 2007 at 3:44 pm
I’ll send you a lousy webcampic as a proof.
mrs.t | March 16, 2007 at 3:46 pm
#16-Dude, exercise had nothing to do with Paris’ performance in that video.
She is, literally, a lazy fuck.
TJH | March 16, 2007 at 3:46 pm
Big deal. You know what they say about fat girls: find a fold and fuck it!
herb3 | March 16, 2007 at 3:48 pm
Paris has no feet.
mrs.t | March 16, 2007 at 3:48 pm
#23- I thought it was “Roll them in flour and look for the wet spot.”
ponk | March 16, 2007 at 3:52 pm
those camp kids will eat these two alive…literally.
ponk | March 16, 2007 at 3:53 pm
and look, there’s Danielle bottom pic, far left.
Lowlands | March 16, 2007 at 3:56 pm
#25)I’m wondering wat mr.T would say about this.
schack | March 16, 2007 at 4:02 pm
i don’t want a web cam of you. gross.
Lowlands | March 16, 2007 at 4:02 pm
The good news for Nicole Ritchie is she doesn’t need this flourbath.There ain’t any wet spot anyway.
mrs.t | March 16, 2007 at 4:05 pm
He would pity the fool who coined the phrase. Then he would thank god that his wife is stunningly gorgeous, slimly athletic, and perfect in every way.
Finally, he would kill you for talking to me, throw your body on the back of the van, and leave you in a shallow grave behind the salvage yard. What do you want? He’s Mr. Motherfucking T.
Lobo | March 16, 2007 at 4:07 pm
Any ideas/guesses as to the themes for the remaining four weeks?
NicotineEyePatch | March 16, 2007 at 4:12 pm
They’ll sneak in junk food and sell it to the kids at a 200% markup, like Cartman did on South Park. And then hopefully one of them will discover the deception and beat the living shit out of both of them on camera.
connie2331 | March 16, 2007 at 4:19 pm
2 stupid little bitches. paris is such a good roll model for anyone. i would not bang either one with a rent a dick let alone my own.
danielle | March 16, 2007 at 4:26 pm
Look there’s Ponk in drag. The ugly redhead.
woodhorse | March 16, 2007 at 4:49 pm
If Paris will teach them to pole dance, I will actually watch TV.
Spindoc | March 16, 2007 at 4:50 pm
I can just hear it now….
Nichole will walk up to them and say “Um, I got three words for you, METH METH METH”
PunjabPete | March 16, 2007 at 5:14 pm
Please god, let one of the mammoths kill Paris… Please god, let one of the mammoths kill Paris… Please god……
elizabeththewellread | March 16, 2007 at 5:53 pm
I’m betting that Paris Hilton will get picked up and cracked in half over somebody’s knee. Everyone with any sense hates her except as an object of ridicule, but some 400 lb. fighting bitch WILL have it out with her. Let’s watch.
iamsosmrt | March 16, 2007 at 6:00 pm
Dear America,
You gave the world Paris Hilton. This means WAR!
P.S. You
luvinit | March 16, 2007 at 6:01 pm
I hope when they “counsel” the fat kids one will have a break through and hug them, and they will be consumed by one of the rolls and never be heard from again until the fat kid decides to loose weight and two skeletons wrapped in pink clothes, monster sunglasses and starbucks cups fall out of the kid.
BarbadoSlim | March 16, 2007 at 6:20 pm
The only Simple Life I wanna see is the one time special were they each drink a gallon 92 octane and then they try to smoke cigarettes.
A very special final episode on the dangers of smoking.
RichPort | March 16, 2007 at 6:28 pm
Anyone else think it’s uber gay for these anorexic semen recepticles to wear matching, clothes. It looks like Richie borrowed Hilton’s shorts. Fuck, that’s nasty, …
15., 19. Dutch, as in “lowlands of Holland”. Euros would be fine, the dollar exchange is pretty good now.
Oh, and RPLTC like a dog with a bully stick! Where is that gay fucker, anyway?
WTFiswrongwithUppl | March 16, 2007 at 6:32 pm
41–Pure. Fucking. Comedic. GOLD!!!
RichPort | March 16, 2007 at 6:34 pm
40. Lean and mean, baby! And if you’re going to declare war, you should probably practice your two-handed salute, “cheese-eating surrender monkey”, …
iamsosmrt | March 16, 2007 at 6:57 pm
RichPort,
I have read many of your comments and you are hilarious. I’m just joking around. Because I am in fantastic shape I’m lover not a fighter. I think the stupidest people in the world are the one’s who actually think of a America as a giant group they can make generalizations about and I was wondering if I would get some comments of people agreeing.
Anyhow, if the entire world joined together to kill Paris Hilton and the festering wart she named Nicole maybe then, we would finally have world peace.
danielle | March 16, 2007 at 7:32 pm
Sooooo, all of your kids will be attending right Ponk?
imran karim | March 16, 2007 at 8:23 pm
richie looks good there
katlady12 | March 16, 2007 at 9:27 pm
Since when did nicole start to look like a blonde, white chick? shes looks like paris more and more.
okiedoke | March 16, 2007 at 10:27 pm
#18 – totally agree.