Paris Hilton Hates Reality, Has A Butt Crack

Once, when she was very little, Paris Hilton met an old sailor who told her that, “Argh, nothin’ relieves a below deck itch like a fresh waft of sea air on your biscuit,” so that explains these photos. With that in mind, here’s another story about Paris getting pissed off after a reporter dares suggest she won’t be famous forever and ever. Via RadarOnline:

Correspondent Edwina Bartholmew also politely asked Paris, “What about when you’re not famous anymore, what are you going to do?”
The 31-year-old Hilton responded by saying that she “just wants to be able to have children and have a normal life with my kids.”
Although she said it all in her typical Paris baby-tone complete with a smile, her publicist later made it clear that the heiress was not happy with being asked about losing her fame.
Sunrise producers were told that if they aired the full interview they would not be allowed on the red carpet at the club opening that night.
The show didn’t take kindly to being threatened by Hilton and ran it anyway.

In the end, Paris Hilton actually did have the Sunrise crew banned from the club opening, but only because she’s banging Afrojack who will clearly do anything for an itchy handjob. Otherwise, I like to believe Paul Hogan would’ve went, “Oy! Who’s the Sheila tryin’ to ban me mates?” and then whipped a boomerang at her vagina for looking like vegemite.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Splash News