Paris Hilton Almost Got Stabbed

A double-knife wielding assailant apparently tried to make his way into Paris Hilton’s house to do the Lord’s work this morning only to discover she’s rich and can afford things like security cameras and alarms. I guess the mansion didn’t tip him off. People reports:

“In the early hours of this morning an armed man with two kitchen knives attempted to break in to Paris Hilton’s home when she was sleeping,” her rep said in a statement Tuesday. “The security cameras and alarm system were alerted and the police immediately came to the house and arrested the intruder who was attempting to break a window when they arrived. Paris is naturally shaken by the events but is unharmed and well.”

On a related note, this news explains why there was a two-hour gap between the Miss Universe and Lindsay Lohan posts. I’m sorry, this seemed much better on paper, but at least my attorney was right and everyone involved realized no jury would ever convict me. But, as a consolation, Paris managed to snap a picture of me getting cuffed, so here you go so I can stop getting e-mails asking what I look like. (Note: I’m kind of having a fat day.)

Photos: Fame